I went without a shower for 3 days – 22nd June 2002

Saturday 22nd  The fieldtrip was hell. Last year they went to Malta, the Geography lot went to Switzerland and we get dumped in South Wales. Woohoo.

The place we stayed in was awful. From the outside it looked okay but once inside, ugh! It was freezing cold, the rooms were tiny and full of midges and it was just generally crap. I shared a room with Jen and Sally which we were very pleased about cos we could’ve been with the old people. However, we couldn’t actually get into our room at first due to the door handle being knackered. Once we did get in, the stuff we put on the floor (mainly clothes) ended up damp because of a wet patch across half the room.

After a particularly unpleasant tea on the 1st night, Sally, Jen and I decided to have a shower. We found some in the block that were pretty nasty looking with brown patches on the walls and hair clogging up the plug, but we were told they were for staff and ours were across the car park. The ones for us were 10 times worse. They were cold with muddy puddles full of grass on the floor, a vast collection of dead insects scattered around, cobwebs in the windows and brown/yellow stains everywhere. They looked like they hadn’t been cleaned for years. The showers themselves were pathetic trickles that took about 10 minutes to warm up and we later found out the water came from a stream (probably full of dead sheep).

If being traumatised by having daddy long legs flying round in the shower wasn’t enough, on my way out I spotted it. The biggest fucking moth I have EVER seen was sat on the door to get out. It was kind of sparrow-sized and I was sooo scared of it flying at me. It stayed there all week too and even the lads were scared to shift the thing. At one point I went without a shower for 3 days just cos of the moth!

We were out doing fieldtrips every day. Some were awful, e.g. when Dr V took 2 hours to explain something that could’ve taken 5 minutes while we were being eaten alive by midges and missing our dinner. Some, like the trips to the beach and rock pools, I quite enjoyed. We visited Port Talbot steelworks (Corus), sand dunes and rock pools at the Gower Peninsula, mud, beaches and a pub.

The fieldtrips would’ve been much more bearable had we not had Dr V rambling on and on and on. Just as you thought he’d stopped talking, he started again, usually due to an old person or Ben asking a question. Even the other lecturers got bored!

Another annoying thing about the damn trip was that we missed most of the World Cup. Just before we had to do our presentations on the last day (ours was on the rock pools – me, Jen and Sally did it) we got to watch England lose to Brazil on a tiny fuzzy black and white TV. Oh joy.

The whole trip just got to the point when it was so bad it was funny. On nights, we were working til 11:30pm and watched Archie trying to force down a shepherd’s pie, which he hates. Poor Julie even had to have her birthday there.

I got to know people I’d never really spoken to before and I found I got on really well with Sally. We talked loads and I found out she knows Pierced Sam who’s living with Jonas next year. We’ve got the same taste in lads, clothes, music and hate talking to our parents about lad stuff. She’s been going out with her boyfriend Harvey for a long time too. It’s just weird how I’ve never really bothered with her before because we’ve mainly stuck with people we met in Freshers Week.

Kevin managed to not only piss me off this week but piss off just about everyone else there too. Most people got to know and like each other more but Kevin just annoyed everyone. Here is a list of examples:

  • Jen was telling us how her Scalextric has trucks on it and we were all quite impressed. Kevin then felt the need to better her and reeled of loads of cars he’s got on his.
  • When we had a quiz, Kevin was so determined that his team beat me, Jen, Archie and Sally that he even pissed Ben off who was a member of his team. Ben later told me (on one of his many night time rants in our room about Kevin) that he was actually hoping we’d beat them because of Kevin!
  • Jen put the tiniest bit of vodka in Archie’s pint and Kevin said very loudly how immature it was, I think in the hope Archie might be grateful.
  • Kevin basically said people from council estates are scum. Jen lives on a council estate.

There were many more incidences of Kevin being a prick but I’d be here forever if I wrote them all down.

Ooh, I’ve just remembered another… During our presentation of our project, Kevin said to Archie, “I bet that’s all she’s gonna do” about me when I was changing slides. He was wrong. Grrr! However, Rick and Ben called Kevin “Shit” all week. It started cos they’d called him “Tidy Ida” for folding his underwear and stuff. He didn’t like that so Rick pointed out they could call him much worse, e.g. Shit. Ha ha!

Ben also commented on the fact that Kevin always goes on about the size of his speakers. Ben started saying stuff like, “Which speakers are those then? I don’t think I’ve ever heard you mention them.” Hee hee!

I spoke to Jonas twice when I was in Wales. He said he loves me and misses me but wasn’t doing much but working in a wood yard. He said I could stay at his auntie’s house with him while he looks after it. I did get a bit upset once cos I missed him a lot. I can’t wait to see him.

Bye!

Love rats and trust – 9th & 16th June 2002

Sunday 9th  Jonas stayed at mine all this week cos he’s moved all his stuff out of his house and to his mum’s. I really like having him at mine all the time but I kept snapping at him for things like eating all my food. I think I’m a little bit worried about exams etc., I don’t really mean to do it.

I had a Water Science and a Microbiology exam this week. The Water Science one was okay but Microbiology was really hard. It was multiple choice but I couldn’t do it. I’m gonna have to rely on luck!

I went out on Thursday to Bar Non. It was very boring. I got a hug off one off Jill Baines but there was nobody else out really.

Jonas keeps saying he loves me! 🙂 I really don’t want him to go home. It’s going to be horrible not seeing him as much.

Bye!

Sunday 16th  Jonas went home this week so he can start his job in the woodyard. Before he left, we did stuff. He wanted to leave me something to remember him by but I don’t think I’m going to forget him! It doesn’t feel like I won’t see him for ages. We said goodbye at uni in the car with lots of hugs and kisses. I’m going to miss him so much! I do already.

Violet left this week as well so I’m not entirely sure who’s left now because I never see them.

We went out for Kevin’s birthday on Tuesday but it wasn’t all that exciting. I got upset when I got back to my flat cos I missed Jonas so much. I didn’t think he was going to ring but he did. He’s just been fixing his car and might be back on the 25th. He said he misses me and loves me and he hugged the phone and blew kisses down it! 🙂

Some gimp of a lad who was wearing a matching shirt to his friends came up to me in Warehouse and lifted my chin and said something about turning my frown upside-down. Hazel said the look of disgust on my face was funny. She asked me to go to the cinema tomorrow too. I felt really guilty for some reason. I felt like I shouldn’t be dressed up so things like lads coming on to me wouldn’t happen. I wouldn’t cheat on Jonas but even people coming on to me when he’s not there makes me feel bad, even though it’s not my fault.

I had my last exam on Thursday then Jonas rang me. He said he really misses me now but he didn’t as much before. I told him some creepy lad came on to me because he asked if anyone had. I then asked if he trusted me (I’d been watching Trisha about love rats and trust) but saying that probably made him suspicious. I just want him to know I’d never do anything and I want him to say the same.  I trust him anyway. Ooh, I love Jonas! 🙂

The stage which I’m going to miss Wheatus playing on went up right outside my bloody window on Friday. I’m sooo pissed off! I want to go to the Summer Ball, not on a crappy fieldtrip to Wales.

Jonas started work. He said he’s tired but it was easy and ok. He told me he’s been “bored” twice and was getting excited when I mentioned no knickers and dancing naked in the rain! He said he might get “bored” again! He told me he really does miss me now and he’ll worry something’s happened if I don’t ring from Wales. He said he loves me 🙂 mmm! I really love him and miss him too!

Bye!

Jake can bloody well piss off – 2nd June 2002

Sunday 2nd  I had my Atmospheric Science exam to start this week off and it wasn’t too good at all. I was expecting to have to write an essay at some point in the exam but the entire exam was 3 essays. I don’t think I did too well unless some of my waffling happened purely by chance to be correct. Jonas came round later to cheer me up.

Jonas was happy on Wednesday cos he got some good comments for his work. I actually have no idea how well I’m doing in some subjects. I would quite like to know then I can either not stress or decide to work harder.

On Thursday, there was the school disco that I’m on the flyer for. It was pretty good actually, even though I’ve been to loads. Jonas looked really good in the jeans he cut the bottoms off, a cap and some freckles for eyeliner. He said I looked good too. Rick off my course also told me I was looking good, Fit Phil (Jen named him that – I disagree) from Ben’s flat pinched my arse and so did some others. Dave told Jonas he’s really lucky cos I’m great. That was nice of him. Jonas said he definitely agreed 🙂 I’m lucky to have Jonas too.

When we were in Rock Café, Aletta from Ben’s flat spoke to me. I was surprised cos Archie told me she didn’t like me for some reason and she usually blanks me. I think it’s from the start cos they said we spied on them from our flat and I told Ben that they were being a bit pathetic.

Back at Storthes, Jonas started talking about houses together again. It makes me happy to think we might be together for that long and he’s thinking about it. He did scare me when he said there was a 1% chance I’d meet someone else over the summer. I don’t want him to think that cos he might meet someone as well. I want him to know I don’t want anyone else too.

On Friday, I went home with Jonas and Archie for Abby’s 18th birthday party. It was also a school disco!

[Birthday girls]

All my mates from home were there too so it was good fun. Archie got very, very drunk and snogged Karen. He then got upset cos she then went off and snogged Cat and Jake (at the same time!). He was then sick all over Floyd’s sofa cos we went there afterwards. He kept telling me how I’m his best mate, “Not just at uni, best mate ever!” Aww!! I have to day, I think he’s one of my best mates too.

[Jonas, Archie & me]

I saw Freddie Bevan at the party. I used to be really good mates with him when he went out with Emma T but he’s getting married now! That’ll be weird when my mates start getting married.

Jake said Cat and Karen are a pair of nymphomaniacs. He kept talking to my dad too which I didn’t like cos Jonas is my boyfriend now so he should be the one speaking to my dad. Jake can bloody well piss off. Mind you, he did spend most of his time sat in the corner with Connor. Hah!

[Gethin teaching us one of his dances.]

Yesterday, Archie wasn’t feeling very well at all. I can’t say I was surprised! He got the train home okay though. Jonas walked Mollie round the fields with me. It was really nice. We saw some ducklings and they sat incredibly still and well camouflaged in the pond when they saw us. I didn’t know ducks did that. We came back to Huddersfield last night and Jonas stayed at mine all today.

Bye!

Just giving him certain looks may cause trouble – 26th May 2002

Sunday 26th  On Monday, I had a night out to Camel Club. Jonas was there too with his mates and a load of curly Scouser wigs. Paul, Dave and Mitch were all being really nice to me and Paul even hugged me at one point. Geeky Sid however didn’t really speak to me so I didn’t bother trying to make an effort cos when he’s pissed he always turns EVERYTHING I say into something bad and he sulks.

Jonas was pretty drunk too and had a stern word with me about being nice to Sid before I’d even seen him. Apparently I don’t always have to say anything, just giving him certain looks may cause trouble. Great. I’d better get a mask or something. Jonas was pissed so I didn’t take him being all serious too seriously and he did say later he didn’t mean it to sound like he was having a go at me. Before we left we spent ages searching for Jonas’s wig cos some girl nicked it off him and wouldn’t have it back til he bought her a drink. He didn’t. 🙂

Jonas stayed at mine afterwards and we had our most serious disagreement yet but it was nothing really, it’s just we haven’t really had one before. We were just lying in bed and he was basically not seeing how me not talking to Sid is the best thing to do. If I speak to him it’s even worse. Jonas said I should at least try and I pointed out that I had but it didn’t work. Jonas ended up getting a bit upset cos he said he didn’t want there to be tension between his mate and his girlfriend. I felt guilty then (even though it’s not my fault) so we made up.

Archie, Dave, Jonas and I all had a trip to the cinema on Tuesday night to see Dog Soldiers and Star Wars. They were both very good but Dog Soldiers was better. I did miss some of it though due to hiding behind my knees!

Archie and I were bored on Wednesday night so we went and joined Ben and his mates in Milton. It was quite good actually, considering I don’t know many of them very well. Ben told me that I’m “well happy now” and that he likes it. He used to say I was a bit miserable but I explained that it was probably Kevin’s fault! They all convinced Archie and I to go to Warehouse with them but I went to find Jonas who was working in the computer rooms til about midnight.

Thursday was quite a good night for Archie, Hazel and her new boyfriend Mike and I. We all went out. We started in Wetherspoons where some of Mike’s flatmates were. I got told that a lad called Kav (who I actually thought was quite nice when I’ve seen him around halls) fancied me. They were being evil and not telling him I had a boyfriend even though I told them they should. I wasn’t interested any more now I’ve got loverly Jonas. 🙂 Mmm!

Anyway, there was also a girl called Emma with them and she said she fancied Archie. Once we got into Bar Non, everyone was forcing them together and it actually worked. They ended up snogging loads in front of everyone. That left me as a bit of a gooseberry. I had one last wander round and saw Dave who seemed pleased to see me (I think he was pissed!) and Jake who told me Connor’s invited him to Abby’s 18th party. I then got picked up by Jonas which I was glad about.

Archie went out with Emma the next night to the cinema. The same night, a load of uni publicity people came to our flat with the Skool Disko flyers. I’m famous!

This weekend I’ve been with Jonas nearly all of the time, watching the F1 together and stuff. We’ve been together for exactly 6 MONTHS today. How good is that?! 🙂

Bye!

2 hours slagging off Kevin – 19th May 2002

Sunday 19th  Ooh, I really don’t like being without Jonas now, even for a few hours. I didn’t like it anyway but the more time I spend with him the worse it is being apart.

I only went out once this week. On Monday I went to Camel and saw quite a few people there including Jill Baines from my college who I spoke to for quite a while. I stayed at Jonas’s after.

Unlike most people, I made it into uni on Tuesday morning. There was only Ben and me there. Ben spent most of the 2 hours slagging off Kevin (I wasn’t going to stop him!), saying how he’s annoying and acts like his girlfriend, whinging when Ben goes out without him!

What really started up my hatred of Kevin again was when Ben told me how Kevin had wanted to delay sorting out our rooms for next year because he wanted to fix it so he got the basement. AAARRGGHH!!! He bloody well got it anyway! Bastard! He apparently wants it because he’s got the biggest speakers. Biggest head more like.

On Thursday I sat on the grass at Storthes Hall all day with Jonas and Dave because it was really nice and warm and sunny so we decided to have a BBQ. Jonas brought his guitar too. We were later joined by Archie, Jen, Alexa and a few others so it was quite a good afternoon. I got pretty sunburnt though.

I had a fieldtrip to Castleton in Derbyshire on Friday which wasn’t actually too bad. It was a nice day and we got to go in Peak Cavern and look at all the limestone landforms. Jen and I spoke to more of the Geography people and we got drenched by ducks flying over us.

Jonas went to Gainsborough this weekend for a christening and someone’s birthday. I really, really missed him. I could’ve gone but I only had 3 days to research and do coursework from the fieldtrip, plus it seems like a family thing.

Jonas did text me saying he missed me all night and he’d come and pick me up but I had to say no, even though I was very tempted cos I really wanted to see him. He rang me too and said he was really disappointed I couldn’t go. He said he’d be bored at the christening and stuff without me and said “I love you” before he went. He tried loads to persuade me and said he was looking forward to seeing me a lot so I felt really guilty for not going. I got my work done though.

That evening I went up to the Arb with Archie and Hazel. Archie was being evil about the study room in our house but did say Kevin doesn’t deserve the basement. He also said that Jen’s always trying to start arguments.

Today there was a bike race one and I’ve just had a big yellow Yorkshire Air Ambulance helicopter land outside my room.

Bye!

I’ve got over my stupid insecure worryings – 12th May 2002

Sunday 12th  I’ve spent almost all week with Jonas and I’ve got over my stupid insecure worryings. I really, really love him and being with him and he makes me sooo happy! 🙂 Mmm!

Jonas came out with me and my mates to Visage on Tuesday. I was really pleased when he said he would and it was a pretty good night. I had someone to take the piss out of all the crappy dancey music with and he was all cuddly and kissy and nice and we had nice proper snogs. He’s got bright red hair now too. We dyed it again! I didn’t want to leave him the next morning at all when I went to uni but I got a big hug and kiss off him. 🙂

Jonas didn’t come out on Thursday. Pierced Sam was there and he said hi and kissed me on the cheek. Hazel said I’ll have to visit her next year and we can all meet at the bottom of the hill to go out.

I went to Lincoln with Jonas again this weekend. His sister got bollocked by his mum for drinking cider on the park behind the house. Doh!

Bye!

I really, really didn’t want to dump him – 5th May 2002

Sunday 5th  Since I last wrote in here, quite a bit has happened. On 25th April, my flatmate Layla went out for her birthday. She had a large gathering at the flat first before we all made our way into town. I hung round with Violet, Ronan, Vi’s mate Jo and his coursemate Max cos we didn’t really know many of Layla’s friends and some were pretty slapperish and annoying.

Jonas was supposed to meet me at some point but the first time I phoned him he was still in Sharkey’s with his mate Mitch so I went on ahead to Bar Non. At about midnight, I got a voicemail message from Jonas saying a drunken, “I love you!” and stuff with Mitch in the background but when I tried to ring him back, I kept getting his answer service. I kept trying but couldn’t get hold of him so I went back to Storthes without him.

I was a bit worried when I got back about where he’d got to but I eventually managed to get through and he just said, “Hello?” in a really dozy way before it cut off. I thought I’d woken him up at first but then I got another 2 voicemails saying, “I won’t to be able to stay with you, sorry.” I could tell he was crying so I was very, very worried and upset.

The only thing I could think of as to why he hadn’t met me or answered his phone and sounded upset was that he’d snogged someone else cos he was drunk. I couldn’t really believe he’d do that but then I couldn’t think of another explanation. Him being hurt didn’t cross my mind but then I thought he would’ve told me. However, I was wrong.

After sitting on my floor in tears, throwing my phone about in frustration and even trying to ring his housemate Russell, Jonas eventually sent me a text saying, “I’M IN HOSPITAL GETTING MY HEAD CHECKED” and that was it. My immediate reaction was relief cos he hadn’t cheated on me, then guilt for even considering that he had and then panic again cos I didn’t know what had happened to him. Before the text, I’d be worrying about what to do if he told me he’d snogged a girl. I really, really didn’t want to dump him but I thought I’d have to and that really upset me cos I didn’t want to be without him.

I eventually got a phone call from Jonas saying he’d been beaten up. He sounded very upset so that made me cry even more. He said he’d see me tomorrow and explain but I really couldn’t sleep for tears and worrying.

The next day after much more worrying, I got to see Jonas when he came round. He was all cut and bruised and very tired and a bit confused. He told me it was 5 lads that did it. He’d been in Warehouse and dancing a lot and apparently girls were watching him so some bloke shoved him and he shoved back. They got chucked out but the bouncers gave Mitch and Jonas a head start. The lad and his mates managed to catch up with them by the new Kingsgate Centre and Jonas pinned one down and said he didn’t want a fight.

The lad was obviously embarrassed by being overpowered by someone wearing a “I’m not a bitch, I’m THE Bitch and that’s Miss Bitch to you” t-shirt so he fought anyway. Jonas ended up being kicked in the head for about 5 minutes but luckily it was all on security camera and the police turned up and arrested 3 of the lads. I’m sooo glad he’s alright cos even the police said it looked really nasty. He was lucky. Mind you, even with head injuries we got to level 5!

That weekend I was with Jonas all the time. We watched the F1 together and went to the Arb with Archie and his brother. We also got to level 5 twice in the same night.

The next time I went to Bar Non was a better night than the previous time. It didn’t take much though! Archie was trying to pull a girl called Natalie but was let down and was upset about it. I got dragged round by Hazel all night trying to find some lad called Simon. We eventually did and he lives with Bronwen’s brother at Primrose Hill. Bronwen’s bro (Tom, I think) tried to get me to go back to his house but, obviously, I refused. I had a few lads pinching my arse too. I wanted Jonas there.

I was going to go to a Mansun gig with Jonas in Manchester but I couldn’t in the end cos Pierced Sam was taking his girlfriend instead. Jonas brought be back a t-shirt though which was sweet. 🙂

I had a worry about me and Jonas again while I was watching Teachers because someone said if you have to ask if it’s ok, it might not be. However, I then realised I was just being stupid and insecure because I do love him and I don’t want to be without him. I’ve been through reasons about Easter and I think my brain might just be preparing me for the worst, just in case something happens e.g. an “Emma” and he goes off me. I’ve got to trust he won’t though cos I know he loves me and he’s not Jake, thankfully, cos everything went wrong with him. I prefer Jonas too!

I went to Gainsborough with Jonas today so he could clear his dad’s garage out. I actually enjoyed it quite a lot. We talked about my year work experience and Jonas said he’ll come with me for it if it’s far away 🙂 but he said it’d be awful not living together when we got back. True. I hope we’re still together then, I really do.

Bye!

I was very, very, very pissed off – 23rd April 2002 – Part 4

Tuesday 23rd continued  I’ve been to Manchester twice with Jonas to try and get tickets for T in the Park but unsuccessfully so we ended up buying loads of clothes and stuff in Affleck’s Palace instead.

There were rumours going round that Jake was seeing Sophie but Archie set me straight and said they just snogged and stuff a few times cos Jake isn’t that interested. That was during a good night in the Arb. Jonas ended up quite tipsy and asked if I’d marry him (in the future!). I said I would. He said he wants to be with me forever again. 🙂 He also bought condoms over the counter for the 1st time. What an achievement! 🙂

Anyway, since I’ve been back after Easter, my main concerns has been looking for a house for me, Archie, Jen and Kevin. It has caused me much stress cos I’ve been the one doing the ringing round etc. and being told “Sorry, the house has been taken” over and over again.

We looked round a house in Birkby owned by someone Archie works with. The house was quite nice but we’ve been told to avoid Birkby and Fartown in the past. So, I carried on going through uni’s house list and managed to make an appointment to see 3 on the same day. The 1st was a total dump. We decided we didn’t want to live in it before we even got inside! It had 4 bedrooms and 2 tiny kitchens and smelled funny.

The other 2 however were owned by the same people and they were much nicer. We found it hard to decide which one we wanted but eventually picked the 3rd one. They only problem with it is the scrap heap of a garden the bloke nextdoor had. Our landlord said he’s just a retired and nice enough bloke. Inside OUR house (I like saying that) is quite spread out. There’s quite a big lawn at the front with an old people’s home opposite and a Baptist church nextdoor on the right. The address is: 20 Cross Lane, Primrose Hill. But the house faces onto Industrial Street because it’s a quad terrace thing. It’s only about 10 minutes walk from uni. There’s a room in the attic and then a tiny study, bathroom and bedroom on the 1st floor. There’s a bedroom in the basement and one off the living room/kitchen area. Hazel and her mate, and Sophie will be living near us and there are loads of other student houses round there too. 4 lads are living in ours at the moment.

We picked rooms the other day cos we all want to know where we’ll be so we can plan ahead. We wrote all the rooms on pieces of paper, screwed them up and picked. Archie picked 1st, read it and while Kevin was whinging he didn’t want to pick first, he put it back. That made it unfair from the start. We did it again and I was very, very, very pissed off with the outcome:

Attic – Jen

Basement – Kevin

Next to bathroom – Archie

Next to kitchen – me

Jen got exactly what she (and I) wanted so she was hyper and smiling like mad. Kevin also got exactly what he wanted. Archie was just relieved he didn’t pick my room (probably for what would’ve been the 2nd time) because I got the room nobody wanted. The reasons none of us really wanted it were as follows:

  • It’s longer and narrower than the others and so it looks smaller.
  • It seems darker.
  • It’s right off the kitchen/living room so if work/sleep is needed to be done, we’d get disturbed.
  • It’s downstairs.
  • Have to walk through the kitchen/living room to get upstairs to bathroom.

So, I’m basically not very impressed, although I’ve got a bit more used to the idea than at first. I’m just going to try and get all my work stuff done in the study even though Jen said no (which I thought was incredibly selfish seeing as she got the attic) and I only persuaded Archie to let me have a few extra shelves. We should’ve agreed to start with that whoever got my room got that cos it’d be fairer and would’ve been compensation.

Anyhow, the main reason why I’m annoyed is because I did all the work to find us a house and I got the worst room but Kevin, who did fuck all and found eating pizzas more important than houses, got exactly what he wanted. It’s just not on! Grrr!!

I don’t know how but I’ve got to try and make my room really cool so everyone else wishes they’d got it. Maybe I can escape out of the window too.

Archie told me twice about Jen slagging me off to him recently. Once she said I was being bitchy about Maths coursework when I hadn’t said anything even though she “forgot” we were meant to be doing it and went to Morrisons instead. Then again she said to Archie that I’d seemed in a bad mood recently. Archie said I hadn’t. I hope she’s not going to turn out to be really moody and awful to live with.

Last Wednesday, everyone went and sat out on the grass at Storthes cos it was lovely and warm and sunny. Jake said Jen and I could come to his BBQ if we wanted but we didn’t bother.

Jonas has been really nice to me whilst I’ve been stressing about various things. He’s given me loads of cuddles and things and just been generally sweet. I wouldn’t want to be without him. I love Jonas 🙂 Mmm!

Bye!

He’s only 80% sure I love him – 23rd April 2002 – Part 3

Tuesday 23rd continued  I came back to Huddersfield the evening of my test after stopping and seeing Auntie G and Grandma on the way back. Grandma’s back at home again now with more home help.

I phoned Jonas when my dad left my halls and he came round pretty soon after. It was pretty weird seeing him at first. We just had lots of hugs and little kisses. It was nice though. Jonas said he had to keep pinching himself and said he missed me and loves me. It was sooo good seeing him again. Mmm! 🙂

That weekend I went with Jonas back to Gainsborough because his dad’s moving house and Jonas had to check the house was okay while his dad’s in the Falklands. The house is very nice. We went to Lincoln with his sister and drove around a lot taking keys to various people.

Everyone was very nice to me again. Jonas’s mum let us have her bed which I thought was very kind and trusting! We did get up to level 5 in it but stopped before anything happened. Jonas said he just wanted to lie there naked with me. It’s the first time we’ve shared a proper, comfy double bed!

When I got back to Huddersfield, I got to my 2nd lecture to be told I failed my Statistics tests by 2 marks. Grr!! I’ve got to resit it and the most I can get is 40%. I also saw Jonas for the 1st time in Huddersfield when he hasn’t been with me. We were in the Kingsgate Centre with our mates.

That Monday night, I had quite a good night in Camel. Jonas was very pissed and was putting on Jen’s eyeliner and lip gloss. Bronwen said Jonas is a “wicked dancer” as he moshed about on his own on the dancefloor. I briefly saw Jake who pecked me on the cheek and congratulated me on passing my driving test and saw loads of other people I knew.

I left early with Jonas and he came back to mine. For some reason he said he’s only 80% sure I love him as much as he loves me cos of Jake and Archie. I don’t know why cos I do! It’s scared me cos I don’t want him to think that. Jonas also said he’d marry me if he could but he doesn’t want to scare me. I’m not scared 🙂 I like that idea (but obviously not now)! He said he wants to be with me forever. 🙂 Mmm!

The next day, Jonas said he only said the 80% thing cos he was pissed but he does want to marry me and have babies with me (EEK! to the 2nd bit! It looks horrible!). He said he always wondered why people get engaged at uni and now he knows. It’ll be more special than it is already if he ends up being my longest lasting boyfriend. I hope he is!

Since then I’ve been quite busy. I’ve been out quite a few times and had houses to sort out etc. I’ve been to the cinema to see Bend It Like Beckham and Oceans 11 which were both very good.

I also went out to Bar Non which was an okay night. I was pretty drunk!

I’ve been told never to let on I know – 23rd April 2002 – Part 2

Tuesday 23rd continued  The main reason for me coming home was so I could do my driving test at 1:33pm on 12th April. All but the lesson but one before my test had gone okay but the one that went wrong (and I got upset) really worried me.

The day before my test, Denny, Isaac and Rocky invited me for a day out with them. We went to the Lowry Centre first after seeing Cat at work (I didn’t see Dodgy Dirty Dan but I saw Dougie). We then changed direction and went to Liverpool to see Sarah which was nice. It was a good day, I enjoyed it. Denny gave me 2 cards (one for my birthday last November and one for tomorrow) as well.

It was really not nice not hearing from Jonas much over the holidays. His mobile gets no signal and he has no credit so he couldn’t even text me. He was going to come and see me but couldn’t afford it which was a bit disappointing. I spent a lot of time thinking about me and Jonas though and some of that was worried thinking. At one point I felt like I wasn’t missing him as much as I did Jake but then I trust Jonas and I knew where he was and who he was with pretty much. Also, the hols were only 3 weeks and I think being apart from someone for 3 months in the past has made it more easy going.

I also began thinking that this love thing’s new to him but not to me and I kind of want Jonas to be my first love cos then it’s equally as special for us both. Still, he’s ‘had’ more girls than I’ve had lads. I hope we’re together for a long time cos then it will be very special cos we’ll be each other’s longest relationship.

I really do love Jonas and I missed him sooo much over Easter. I wouldn’t want anyone else. He did ring me a couple of times and I phoned him too. He told me he was bored too and 4 of his sister’s mates fancy him (GRRR!!) but they don’t know he’s taken. He was disappointed when we thought I might not be able to go to T in the Park cos of a fieldtrip but I can. Every time we spoke he said he loves me and misses me. 🙂

I got a few texts off him when he nicked his sister’s phone. One said, “ I am missing u + can’t wait to see u again! Bloody phones messing about – sorry : ) u ringing me 2mo? Looking forward to it. I was thinking about u when u rang. Love j x”. He kept telling me on the phone he couldn’t wait to see me and hugged the phone and made kiss noises to me!

Right, back to my driving test then. Since Abby did hers a few days before, I’d been really nervous cos she passed and it kind of put the pressure on for me to pass 1st time. However, Dad accidently let it slip that Abby didn’t actually pass 1st time, she failed her 1st attempt a month earlier. I was really pleased he told me cos it really took some pressure off. I’ve been told never to let on I know.

Even so, before my test I was incredibly nervous. My instructor (Charles) had been warning me about a “little Hitler” examiner and how he was really tough so when he came into the room and called my name I felt even worse.

I got going okay and did a perfect 3-point turn but when it came to reversing round a corner, I totally messed up. I almost hit the curb and realised but I couldn’t remember how the hell I could sort it out. In the end (after sitting there with a blank mind for a minute or 2), I pulled forward and reversed again and hoped for the best.

I really thought I’d blown it. For the rest of my test I could see the guy (Chris, I think he’s called) putting marks on the sheet so I just wanted to get it over with.

Just as I was halfway into the parking space at the end, I managed to stall the car which was more embarrassing than anything else cos my instructor saw. I really thought I’d failed so when he said, “I’m pleased to tell you you’ve passed” I was sooo shocked. I only got 8 minor faults too!

It still hasn’t really sunk in yet cos I haven’t driven anywhere. My sister has but I’ve not been insured on the car.