Prancing around thinking they were God’s gift – 27th June 2001

Wednesday 27th P. [period]

Jake was at my house nearly all day but I had to get ready and then go to my college leaving do. He went to The Dog then The Coach and then his mates’ flat where he played with the hamster and talked, apparently.

The leaving do was pretty good and quite eventful actually. It was held at The Village Hotel in Warrington which is really nice. We had the do in a big room but we spread into the bar and outside as the night went on.

Cat’s dad took me, her, Karen and Lizzie there so we all met at Cat’s first. It was weird cos Sarah wasn’t there and we kept feeling like we’d forgotten someone.

[Cat, me, Lizzie and Karen pre-Smirnoff Ices]

Sarah decided not to go, even though we all had a go at trying to persuade her, because she was feeling rough (and embarrassed/guilty/worried) about her activities last night. I’m pretty annoyed with her about it actually. It was Lizzie’s birthday so a few of them went to Warrington (I had no money) and got reeeally bladdered. Sarah snogged 4 random lads including Isaac, had to be helped into a taxi and then slept where she fell on her kitchen floor with the back door open.

The bit I’m annoyed about is her activities with the lads. Poor Michael. I bet he wouldn’t do that to her. Anyway, I said my piece on the phone and she does feel very guilty about it. It’s also a shame she didn’t come to the do cos she missed out and she won’t be on any of the photos.

When we arrived at the hotel, we were greeted by glasses of champagne. The room was fill of balloons and streamers and there was some food out.

[Me, Isaac, Denny, Floyd, Lizzie and Karen]

Isaac made me feel sorry for him at one point when he asked me if the reason Sarah hadn’t come was cos of him. I told him it wasn’t cos as far as I know that’s true. He said he felt really guilty about Michael but Sarah did throw herself at him.

The gap between upstairs and downstairs people in college* was bridged a bit at the do and most people made the effort to talk to each other. It was mainly the lads from downstairs who were being nice to us but I was also talking to Daisy Smith and Josie Nichol who I used to be friends with at primary school.

*[We had one common room downstairs in the 6th Form College building but the swots/moshers/LGBTQ+ amongst us formed a breakaway common room in a disused classroom upstairs away from the popular people where we felt more comfortable all being mildly weird together. It was known as The Mosher Room by those that didn’t use it.]

However, some people did more than just talk. Lizzie got with Jez Greenhalgh and she have him a number 4 behind some building. Karen and Tunde also got together and did number 4 to each other on the grass outside!

[Jez and Lizzie mid-snog]

Adrian Ford felt my arse and then I had a long chat with Gethin in which he told me that he used to fancy me more than he’s ever fancied Jake. Ha ha!! I find that hard to believe actually. We’re friends again anyway.

[Gethin and I being bezzie mates again]

Aww, Mr P was there tonight with scan pics of his baby (his wife’s pregnant). I asked when it’s due and he told me November. I told him my birthday’s in November and he asked what date. I said the 12th and he looked freaked out for a second before telling me that’s the day it’s due. I hope it’s born on my birthday. That’d be really nice.

I spent quite a bit of my night trying to cheer up Denny. He was feeling a bit miserable cos of Jez and Lizzie getting together cos he still really likes Lizzie. He’s too nice for Lizzie and I really hope he gets a really nice girlfriend soon because I think he deserves one.

[Me, Lizzie and Denny in his fetching white suit]

Some daft awards were given out tonight after people voted in college. Here’s who go what:
[I can’t believe we were allowed to dish some of these awards out!]

Best looking lad James Douglas (Dougie)Mirror  
Best looking girlEmma ThornleyMirror  
Biggest beer bellyJez GreenhalghPie  
Biggest party animalFreda Fernandez (Freda wasn’t there so Pallav got it instead)Party hat  
Most unlikely coupleFreda Fernandez and Julian Olsen 
Most likely coupleGethin Turner and Paul Wenham (Big Paul)Confetti + 2 model grooms
Most likely porn star  Karen BrentPineapple condom
Biggest male slapper  Gethin TurnerPack of condoms
Biggest female slapperLizzie Bond  Pack of condoms
Biggest pissheadStuart Hobbs  Pint of something
Best arseTanya Potter (Tanya wasn’t there so Tara Costello got it instead) 
Best dressedShauna Adams   
Most likely virginAled Brownlee   
[Jez and his pie prize]

I could’ve slapped Shauna and Tara. They were prancing around thinking they were God’s gift all night after that. They were also glaring at Emma all night, obviously out of pure jealousy.

The only other things that really happened was a fight between Orson Platt and Adrian Ford over Poppy Kaye, and David Ingle being sick due to excessive amounts of alcohol cos it was his birthday!


She’s really false – 25th & 26th June 2001

Monday 25th I went to the Trafford Centre with Jake. We got the bus there and Robbie’s girlfriend Amy got on it too. Jake seem to like her and get on with her but she completely ignored me. I wish Robbie liked and got on with me.

When we got there, we also saw loads of people from Jake’s year. Earlier we saw some of them drive past and then we saw a couple of others and then his ex-girlfriend on the way home. The lad (Alex) was the only one who acknowledged my existence and asked me if I’m going to the college leaving do on Wednesday cos he is seeing as he stayed back at college a year.

They all asked Jake about Canada (grr!) and he informed some of them that he’ll go back at some point to renew his qualification thing. He said I could go with him but it involved money which I don’t have and I’d be stuck on my own while he pissed off and skied.

Ugh, he also said Jodie Nichols is going to Huddersfield too. This is not particularly good news as she really gets on my nerves. She used to be my best mate at primary school but then she started ignoring me and now she’s really false when she smiles or says hi and stuff. Plus she was openly flirting with Jake once when she thought I wasn’t there.

Grandma’s still in hospital. If something happens to her and everyone goes up to Scotland, I won’t want to go to Barcelona. I don’t know what to do if the worst happens.

Jake’s not got a job in that architect’s office cos there was nowt for him to do. He’s now decided he wants a job in the Quiksilver shop in Manchester.


Tuesday 26th Gethin asked Jake round to his house this morning and I have to say that I was quite a bit pissed off. It was mainly because I felt left out cos he’s meant to be friends with both of us but he’d chosen Jake over me and could’ve asked us both. Also, I know Gethin used to fancy Jake and, even though I know Jake’s not gay, I still don’t like the thought of Gethin being alone with him cos that’s what Gethin would want.

So, I decided to send Gethin a short text message, just to let him know I wasn’t entirely happy, saying, “Why is it that you never ask anyone else round to your on their own? Hmm, I wonder.”

Then about 5 minutes later, the phone rang. It was Gethin asking what the message was in aid of. I told him basically what the problem was and then ended the conversation and thought that was the end of it.

However, when Jake came to mine afterwards, we fell out over it cos he couldn’t see why I felt left out. He started saying stuff about uni too and how we’ll have to have our own friends then. I pointed out that this was different cos we’re both friends with Gethin and I don’t have a problem with him going out without me with his mates that I don’t know as well.

I couldn’t stop crying but then I was also upset about Grandma at the same time cos Mum rang me from work and said she’s really ill.

We eventually made up and he went to Venture Scouts.


No shirt on and all his muscles – 24th June 2001

Sunday 24th Michael, Sarah, Jake and I all went to Radio 1’s One Big Sunday at Heaton Park in Manchester today. It was really good!

Michael drove and we got there at about 11am. We thought it’d be busy by then but it wasn’t at all. In fact, we managed to get really close to the stage. It started at 1:30pm and more people began to crowd around us so it got a bit claustrophobic. We decided to move and when we turned round there were 1000s of people behind us. It was actually quite scary that we hadn’t noticed before. We managed to battle our way through the crowd and found a nice patch of grass to sit on. We were side-on to the stage but still quite close.

All the bands and stuff were really good. There was Sugababes, Outkast (one of which was wearing bright pink fluffy pants!), Emma Bunton, Muse, Mis-Teeq, Usher and Wyclef Jean. Wyclef was the best and after the show went off air, he carried on for a bit.

There were loads of Radio 1 DJs there too including Sara Cox, Jamie Theakston and Nemone.

We saw a few people we knew while we were there too. We saw Abby and Connor and then Robert Osbourne who used to be in my form at high school. He was looking pretty fit actually. He walked past us with no shirt on and all his muscles on the way to the portaloos and he said “Hi”. However, I must say that I much prefer Jake, even if he isn’t quite so toned! 🙂

It took us ages to find and get out of the car park afterwards due to all the people and when we finally did, there were LOADS of police down the road and they’d sectioned off an area of grass and trees with police tape. I want to know why!

When we got back to Sarah’s we were really hot so Jake and I played with some ice for a bit. He then said (because I was sunburnt) that he wished we were staying at Sarah’s another night so he could rub aftersun all over me! J

When I got home, I was informed that Grandma L is in hospital. She’d been going to Thurso with Auntie S when her eyes started rolling and she began thrashing about. Auntie S took her to the hospital there and they transferred her to Wick Hospital in an ambulance. They diagnosed her there with pneumonia which Mum warned me is very serious for old people and Grandma’s very ill. I’m really worried about her now. 😦


Threesomes and foursomes and incest and stuff – 23rd June 2001

Saturday 23rd It was sooo nice waking up with Jake this morning. We didn’t get up for quite a while cos it was nice just lying there. When we were all finally out of bed, we attempted to make breakfast. I did scrambled eggs, Michael did pancakes and Sarah did toast and bacon. Jake served it all up.

We were at Sarah’s nearly all day before going home and then meeting all our other friends in The Dog to do The Run. Cat really pissed me off at one point by having a go at me for asking her very loudly if she was going to “shag” Floyd. I didn’t say that at all. I know because I wouldn’t have phrased it like that. She must’ve just misheard something else but she wouldn’t listen to me when I said I hadn’t said that.

Everyone went back to Sarah’s tonight. We all sat about for a bit before going to bed. We all got out of bed again though to look at the dodgy books Cat and Gethin found in Sarah’s parents’ room. There was one that explained about threesomes and foursomes and incest and stuff. Weird!

Jake and I did stuff but he didn’t ask if I wanted to this time, he just assumed. He assumed right though. We talked for ages and I know we’re being doubly careful as I’m on the pill for my skin but it was still in the back of my mind about that there could be a tiny chance of an accident somehow. So I asked Jake what he’d do if that happened, just as a matter of interest. He said he definitely wouldn’t dump me and would support me in whatever I wanted to do but seemed in favour of abortion if anything happened at our age because we haven’t got any money etc.

He said ideally he’d want to have kids in his early 30s and would want 2 of them (a boy first then a girl). He said he’d rather have 2 girls than 2 boys cos he reckons they’d be easier. He also told me he wants to marry me again but said after uni cos he want to travel round the world first. When I asked him who with, I was hoping he’d say me but instead he said Charlie Wilson and a couple of other mates cos they all said they would. I wasn’t even mentioned! 😦

I then got pissed off (cos when he got back from Canada he said he wouldn’t go anywhere without me again) then I got upset and then tried to get a moth out of the room and managed to break the curtains. Jake then apologised and cuddled me but then said something about Wick which upset me even more cos it doesn’t look like we’re going this year cos Auntie S isn’t coping very well with looking after Grandma L cos she’s old and has lots wrong with her.

Jake then got upset too because I was upset and said he never wants to go anywhere without me again but just didn’t think when I asked cos he didn’t think I’d want to go with the lads. It’d still have been nice if he’d wanted to go with me though.


That’s my last exam failed – 20th to 22nd June 2001

Wednesday 20th AAARRGGHHH!!! Panic! I’m NEVER going to pass Sports Studies tomorrow. I know nothing!

Mum and I went to HSBC in town to try and sort out a student account with them so I can have a free 4 year railcard. However, when I showed the woman my offer from Huddersfield, she started saying how it wasn’t an unconditional offer and that it should be. Duh! Hardly anyone gets them. She didn’t have a clue what she was on about and disappeared into the back loads so whoever was there didn’t know much either. She also started saying how we couldn’t open one until 2nd July but then in the next breath said she’d already opened them for people with offers that looked different to mine.

We also got my holiday money from Lunn Poly and my holiday insurance from Boots and when we got home, Mum rang HSBC and we found out that you can’t open student accounts in any bank until 2nd July for some reason.

I saw Jake this evening and completely out of the blue he said, “I want to marry you”. Obviously he didn’t mean now but it was very nice to hear. 🙂 He also kept cuddling and kissing me and telling me how nice I am. He realises even more how much he loves me when he’s been away. He gave me a lucky kiss for my exam tomorrow and drew a purple smiley face on my hand.


Thursday 21st Well, that’s my last exam failed. No more now. Yey!

I found out today that Mr L’s wife’s been killed in a car crash. It’s awful. She didn’t deserve that.

I went round to Lizzie’s house tonight for a small party to celebrate the end of exams. It was okay but we mainly just sat around and watched the South Park movie. Jake didn’t come because he was doing some pub crawl with his mates somewhere.

Sarah admitted to me that if she met Maz somewhere she probably wouldn’t say no if he launched himself at her. Why can’t my friends stick with one lad? When I point out that I have done, they always say that it’s different “because it’s Jake”.


Friday 22nd It’s so weird now. I keep forgetting I don’t have to revise and I don’t know what to do with myself!

Michael picked me and Jake up this evening and we all went round to Sarah’s because her parents have gone to Cyprus. Sarah was still at work when we arrived but I had a back door key so we just sat around watching Big Brother and stuff. I didn’t want Narinder to be evicted!

We were all staying over so Sarah let me and Jake have the spare bed and Michael slept in Sarah’s bed with her. Jake and I just kissed and cuddled to start with and then things progressed when we were just about to go to sleep.


A total cock-up – 15th June 2001

Friday 15th Well, I thought those exams were going to be bad and so they were. I managed to answer all the biology questions but didn’t have a clue what I was writing about. The geography one was a total cock-up. There were 4 really hard essay questions and I had to do 2 of them. The first one I did was completely vague answers and the 2nd one I just shouldn’t have done cos I didn’t have a clue what it meant. Half way through writing it I realised I should’ve done a different one but I only had about 10 minutes left so it was too late.

Urrggh!! I’m never going to get into uni!

Jake met me outside college after my last exam and we walked back to mine. Well, we started to walk then it started thundering so we got on a bus instead.

He’s going to Scotland with his family tonight to visit friends on the Isle of Mull so we only had about 3 hours before his dad picked him up. We were just talking and for some reason got onto the subject of celibacy. He ended up saying that he’d still love me bit it wouldn’t suit him cos he would be too frustrated! He said he could cope if I didn’t believe in sex before marriage cos there’s the hope that one day it will happen. It was a very jokey conversation and he was telling me (when I pointed out that he went for 16 years without even snogging a girl) that when lads are 16 they always hope that they’ll get to have sex with a girl one day. Hmm, maybe not in some cases. I can’t imagine Rory really wanting to do it with a girl!

Ahh, Jake also told me that after the conversation about what he’d do if I had no legs, that he would still love me just as much. That’s good to know!

He told me he liked my teeth today too. I don’t. They’re all gappy. He said he likes that though. Fairy nuff, I suppose.

I can’t not see him for 3 whole days! Ugh! Ok, so it’s nothing compared to 3 months but I like seeing him and it’s something to look forwards to after revision all day. Ah well, I’ll just have to cope. I will miss him though.


I’m going through an ugly stage – 14th June 2001

Thursday 14th Uurrggh! Shiiiit!! There’s no way I can pass my geography and biology exams tomorrow. I am sooooo fucked!! I don’t know anything and the small amount of information I have managed to memorise means absolutely nothing to me. I’d better start collecting application forms for places like McDonald’s and Woolworths soon cos I very much doubt I’ll be getting 14 points from my exams.

I think I’m suffering from exam stress. Well, that’s my excuse for everything e.g. not emptying the dishwasher, getting pissed off with Abby etc.!

Robbie dropped Jake off at mine tonight in his new car. His girlfriend was in it too. Grrr! It was so good when Jake had a car. I don’t like to think of his bro and girlfriend having one instead.

Jake and I went to the Trafford Centre tonight cos he needed to feed his shirt buying addition. He bought 2. They are pretty cool though.

I blurted out that I didn’t like his brother (not uncommon knowledge cos he hates me) and Jake accused me of attention seeking!? In the end (when we made up) he said he just couldn’t think of anything else to say.

I’m going through an ugly stage (exam stress!) but Jake kept telling me I’m yummy whether I believe it or not. 🙂 I love him!! Actually, I didn’t feel too bad tonight. I’ve been feeling a mess all week but I’ve been stuck at home revising mostly so it was nice to be out tonight and not sat down.


We hid her bra under a bucket – 28th May 2001

Monday 28th Today was sooo good! Actually, it didn’t start off too well cos Karen demanded us to all be at her house for 9am so, because my parents were still in bed and there were no buses cos it’s a bank holiday, I had to walk there in the pouring rain with big heavy bottles of drinks in my bag. I gave up at the end of Crofters Lane and rang Sarah to see where she was. Luckily Michael had picked her up and was going to drive past me so I got a lift with them.

Then I got a phone call from Jake saying he was stuck at home and wouldn’t be able to go unless someone could pick him up. Nobody volunteered so he got pissed off with me (cos I was the one talking to him) which wasn’t very fair, saying that he always used to ferry them about when he had a car. That was a good point. Eventually it was decided that Michael would get Jake and Karen would go to Asda and get more food. Jake cheered up after that.

We were just about to get going when someone decided we needed spades (?!) so we took a detour to Cat’s house to get some and ended up with 2 huge garden spades.

Once we finally set off, the day began to improve. As we neared Ainsdale, the rain began to stop and eventually we saw some sunlight in the distance. Nine of us went in the end. There was me, Jake, Isaac, Denny, Michael, Sarah, Lizzie, Cat and Karen, and we all get on (even though Karen can be very annoying) so that probably helped it to be a good day.

When we finally arrived, we looked like we were on some sort of major expedition on the walk from the cars to the beach. We had 5 disposable barbecues, a little pavilion thing, rugs, a big groundsheet, bags of food and drink, towels, changes of clothes and loads more! We got some funny looks from golfers and dog walkers!

There was a weird yellow substance in all the puddles on the way to the beach. This worried me and Cat cos it looked a bit dodgy. We intended to get a sample and force some chemistry teacher at school to analyse it just in case we were in danger but nobody wanted to touch it. Oh well. Maybe we’re better off not knowing!

When we reached the sand dunes, we found a nice little hollow and put the groundsheet down and all the other stuff. We set up the pavilion/shelter thingy on a flatter bit and the barbecues away from anything flammable. We don’t think we were really allowed barbecues there but there was no-one about and the ground was damp and we were starving so we started lunch. Mmm, I love barbecues and it was really good having one on the beach! We all felt like we were on that Survivor programme that’s on ITV at the moment! (Well, except we weren’t voting people off the beach and doing loads of stupid tasks and things.)


[Cat, Lizzie, Isaac, Karen, Jake, me, Denny & Sarah]

After lunch, the weather warmed up a bit and we actually caught a glimpse of blue sky. So, we all decided to go to the sea for a paddle. However, when we got there, there were loads of dead things floating about, brown water and a layer of yellowish foam. I decided not to go in too far due to this but Lizzie, Isaac, Karen and Cat waded right out.

Minging sea

It was pretty windy and so the waves were quite big and the tide was coming in. I kept losing sight of the 4 of them and they were drifting along the beach. They eventually swam back and were soaking. Cat said she could feel currents under them and it was hard swimming back. Glad I didn’t go in. I’m also suspicious (due to the colour and consistency of the water) that a sewage pipe may not be too far away!

When we got back to our little camp thing, I started digging a big hole. Lizzie also dug a smaller hole in which she buried Karen’s trainers! Other people helped me dig and it ended up really deep. I was proud. My shoulders now hurt though!

Tess in sand hole

I’m sure we shouldn’t have done it cos I remember from the Biology field trip that the dunes are protected or something. Oops.

Karen had hung her bra up on the shelter thing (it wasn’t even wet) and was wandering around wearing only a towel and a cardigan with only one button done up, obviously trying to show off her body to the lads there. This annoyed the rest of us so when she wandered off somewhere, we hid her bra under a bucket (childish, I know!) and replaced it with Cat’s which was wet and about 3 times the size of Karen’s. She didn’t notice until she went to put it on! Then we all felt a bit mean (except Lizzie who though it was hilariously funny) so we replaced Cat’s bra with Karen’s again. She must’ve eventually noticed cos a while later it’d gone. Well, unless it blew away!

Lizzie began to bury Denny’s legs while he was trying to sunbathe but she ended up modelling him a giant penis out of sand which wrapped around his sand legs and went on for miles. We called it Denny’s Anaconda cos we decided that to catch females it would wrap itself around them etc!

Denny's anaconda

Cat then made Lizzie a cleavage out of sand (she hasn’t got one in real life) and put Cat’s bra over it. It looked quite good actually, in a realistic sort of way.

Meanwhile, Sarah and Michael had wandered down to the beach… alone. I went up on the sand dunes to have a quick look at how they were progressing and I was very pleased to see that they were holding hand. 🙂

I went and sat in my hole for a bit cos it was getting windy and I was getting a bit sand-blasted. I then began to dig a lemming hole (well, obviously they live in snow but I like lemmings and it seemed about the right size for one) which ended up the length of my arm. Then Jake started digging downwards and the tunnels met up and we could hold hands. It was really good!

Lemming hole diagram



Sarah snogged Michael when they were on the beach. She told me when we were having another barbecue for tea.

When it began to get cold and our eyes contained more sand than we could stand and our hair became matted and our clothes wouldn’t dry, we dug up Karen’s trainers and decided to go home.

We stopped off at some pub with a Wacky Warehouse to get a drink and make use of the toilets on the way back. Then in the car park, the 5 of us (me, Jake, Michael, Sarah and Cat) in Michael’s car were just putting stuff in the boot and Karen wouldn’t even wait for 2 mins. She just said, “You know where you’re going, don’t you?” and then zoomed off. We didn’t know where we were going at all and got lost somewhere round Bootle.

Eventually we found our way back to the East Lancs and stopped off at Mr L’s house on the way so we could see where he lives. The house was all dark so we turned round in his drive and I had a look over his garden fence. Just grass and a scrubby little path.

Wonder if his wife’s chucked him out. Hope so. Hope he’s having to sleep in a bin liner in a patch of brambles by the motorway so he has easy access to his potential new job at Little Chef! Ha ha ha!!! 🙂


Just face the fact he’s a complete twat! – 16th & 17th May 2001

Wednesday 16th I got hold of Jake eventually this morning when he decided to switch his phone on and we both apologised.

The gorgeous Mr P-K took our Sports Studies group to The Coach and Horses pub for our last lesson with him today. He bought us 2 bags of Quavers and a bag of peanuts between me, Lizzie and Maeve too. That’s got to have been the best lesson ever!!

I saw Jake after college today and we made up properly. 🙂 He kept looking at me and saying I’m pretty and he loves me and stuff!

Jake was telling me how for the last couple of weeks he’s been getting anonymous phone calls and whoever it is hangs up when he answers. That eliminates Hugo then cos he talks to him non-stop! It’s probably some sad little girl (one of the many!) who fancies/stalks him and they’ll have got his number from somewhere.

Jake also told me that he had my mobile number before we got together because he’d been getting weird stalkerish messages and asked Gethin if he had anyone’s number that he hadn’t checked already and mine was one of them! He said if I hadn’t have gone to the party where we met, he’d probably have texted me to let me know he liked me. I would never have believed it though and would’ve thought either he or someone else was just winding me up!

It turned out the messages were from the lad next door to Charlie Wilson (one of his mates) who’d got him to send messages as a joke! Strange!


Thursday 17th First thing this morning, Sarah told me that Robbie Taylor knows about her thinking the female orgasm was a myth and about the Bluebell thing (the story behind why Maz got a blue knob and was therefore nicknamed ‘Bluebell’). Apparently he and Declan were taking the piss out of her yesterday and said Jake had told him. So, I texted him and it turns out he did tell his brother that in order to get Robbie to tell him things. He apologised over and over saying he made his bro promise not to say anything to anyone and he didn’t think he would.

Sarah said she wasn’t bothered but she obviously was but didn’t want to cause trouble so I had a bit of a go at Jake on her behalf. I ended up forgiving him pretty quickly though cos he made me feel sorry for him somehow! His brother’s got a definite evil streak in him. He just doesn’t seem to have any consideration for other people’s feelings.

Yey! Sarah also told me today that she’s willing to give Michael Amhurst a chance! I’ve been trying to get them together for ages! He’s always been up for it but she’s either been stubborn about it or unwilling to get over Maz and just face the fact he’s a complete twat!


He’s a bit of a bitch – 15th May 2001

Tuesday 15th Declan told me in college today that Robbie was winding Rory up on MSN last night so maybe he provoked the insults aimed at me. He also told me that Robbie was slagging him off too to Rory and everyone and that he does it to everyone. So he’s a bit of a bitch basically then!

Jake came to visit me during my free periods today. I met him outside school and noticed Rory walking in front of me. It made me giggle to myself a bit cos Jake had threatened to thump Rory (Haha!! Yeah, right!) if he saw him and I could see Rory flapping about and apologising. Ryan walked off ahead very quickly and as Jake and I rounded the corner, Clara (Jake’s sister) was at the bus stop. When she spotted us she started pointing at Rory and telling Jake to go after him! Apparently she thought Rory was shady for calling me a dog too!

I feel really upset tonight but I’m not sure why. I think it’s a combination of knowing people (i.e. Rory) have been slagging me off for no apparent reason, my ever looming exams (and the fact I’ve hardly revised for them yet!) and the subject of Jake’s dad apparently not liking me coming up in conversation between us again earlier.

Jake started asking why I’m “running” and hardly ever go to his house so I had to explain that I don’t feel particularly welcome knowing his bro said that his dad doesn’t like me and knowing his bro doesn’t like me for getting him bollocked for saying that! The conversation wasn’t getting anywhere so I eventually hung up cos I was really upset. I felt immediately guilty and tried to ring him back but he seems to have switched his phone off. I’ve left him an apology message on his answer machine and sent an apology text message too.

Part of my spine between my shoulder blades doesn’t feel quite right. It’s not really painful, just sort of uncomfortable.