Everyone hates Hayley – 5th January 2001

Friday 5th A big group of us did The Run [a pub crawl] tonight and I discovered that everyone hates Hayley cos she’s been such a bitch to everyone.

The Run

[Left to right: Hayley, Cat, me, Jake, Floyd, Karen, Lizzie and Gethin.]

Sarah told me that when we went for a Chinese, Hayley had told her in the toilets that once Jake’s gone, I’ll try and muscle in on their friendship! Bitch! I don’t like her now either!

Jake got really, really pissed and was hugging everyone (he even managed to fall on the floor with Maisie!) and stuff. He started falling asleep in his Chinese when we got back to mine and I got photographic evidence!

Takeaway

[The photographic evidence.]

He stayed at mine and if he hadn’t have been so drunk I think something could’ve happened but he just fell asleep!

Bye!

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A pub not a youth centre – 4th January 2001

Thursday 4th We all had to go back to college today which wasn’t much fun.

When lessons were finally over, Hayley and I went to meet to meet up with Michael Amhurst. He’s got a car so he picked us up from outside the school and we went to The Coach and Horses.

We expected it to be awkward but it wasn’t too bad actually. He seems really nice (personality-wise) and was okay looking. He told us stuff about school and that he does rowing and which universities he’s applied for and stuff. It was quite weird seeing him after so long actually!

Reunion

[Left to right: Isaac, Hayley, me and Michael after getting chucked out of the pub.]

We ended up getting chucked out of The Coach by this big gruff woman who works there cos we weren’t all drinking something and she yelled at us about it being a pub not a youth centre or something.

There was no-one else in there except the 3 of us and a few of our mates so Cat decided to be cheeky and asked her if she needed the space! Then Hayley pointed out that she’d just finished her drink and the gruff woman turned round and told her to get out so the rest of us went too, leaving a completely empty pub!

Jake came round to mine eventually this evening. We didn’t do much except talk. He told me I’m a really good kisser and that if he was 3 years older he’d marry me! 🙂 Cool! He then asked if we can pretend instead so I said we could cos that sounded really sweet!

That Dido song that’s on the radio all the time now is really going to remind me of Jake leaving because it always comes on when we’re together now!

Michael gave me a lift home after that which I thought was really nice of him cos I’d have had to walk otherwise.

Bye!

Then Jake had a nosebleed – 2nd to 3rd January 2001

[Oh, God. I knew this was coming up soon and have been dreading it. It took me a while to to even read the diary entry in full, never mind type it up. Probably best you don’t read it really. Ok, bye!]

Tuesday 2nd to Wednesday 3rd This evening, Jake and I plus Sarah, Lizzie, Cat, Karen, Gethin, Floyd and Hayley all went for a Chinese meal at Cathay Dim Sum at the Trafford Centre. We got a big banquet and it was really good apart from Hayley who wouldn’t try anything until she realised that if she had her own dish she’d have to pay less (but ate ours anyway), the stingy cow!

After the food, we all went to The Dog. It was sort of Jake’s leaving do so we had to go there for it’s like tradition now!

Hayley and I had some messages off Michael Amhurst arranging to meet up while he’s staying around here.

After Jake dropped everyone at home, we headed back to the Trafford Centre because he booked a room at the Travel Inn there for us. We wouldn’t have been able to stay anywhere on New Year’s Eve so we did it now instead. We were in room number 3 on the bottom floor which is the 2nd window to the right of reception, I think.

We had the TV on for a bit and just cuddled on the bed but Jake switched it off so we could talk instead. I was pretty tired and kept almost dosing off. I wouldn’t have done cos I was a bit nervous about what might happen later though. Even so, Jake kept telling me that I wasn’t allowed to fall asleep so he obviously wanted something to happen.

We both got into our pyjamas and brushed our teeth and stuff before switching the lights off and getting into bed. We kissed and stuff for a bit and then he reached for his toilet bag. At that point, my stomach started tying itself in knots!

He asked if I wanted to give it a go. I could very easily have chickened out but I forced myself to say yes cos deep down I wanted to so I didn’t want to let nerves stop me! He told me that he was nervous too and that it didn’t matter if it was a total disaster! That made me feel quite a lot better actually!

We were just kissing to begin with. It was about 2am by this time but I just wasn’t tired anymore. It must have been the adrenaline or something! I was kind of wanting him to just hurry up so we could just do it and get it over with!

We did in the end. It was nowhere near as bad as I thought it’d be but it still wasn’t brilliant! It seemed to be over really quickly and he apologised. I didn’t really know why he’d said sorry so I asked him a few minutes later when we were just lying there. He took ages to think how he could say it and there were a lot of erms and ums before he said we just need a bit more practice.

We just lay there for ages and I might possibly have dosed off for a bit but there was a point when we were both awake and Jake asked if I wanted to give it another go. I ended up saying no because I’d been bleeding a tiny bit. I think that’s normal but me, being me, worried about it a bit anyway!

A bit later on, I woke up and felt a wet patch on my head. I had no idea what it was until I turned to Jake and saw him crying. I thought at first it was because I’d said no but then he explained it was because he doesn’t want to go to Canada.

We both fell asleep in the end and, when we woke up this morning, we stayed in bed for ages, just cuddling. We eventually had to get out of bed when the cleaners started going round the rooms. One knocked on our door but we had loads of time left before we had to go so she went away again.

Then Jake had a nosebleed. I think it was because he’d been blowing his nose a lot to try and clear it cos he’s got a cold but it was quite a bad one

When we got back to my house, we took Mollie for a walk and then collapsed on my bed. We just chatted and stuff.

This evening, we went round to Floyd’s for a bit and then later I got a message from Jake saying he’s sorry and that he feels stupid. I think he was referring to last night so I reassured him it wasn’t that bad and he seemed to cheer up a bit!

Bye!

Foot-soldier of the MCRmy – November 2010/February 2011

[Hello to Isabella!

She’s here to share her diary account sexy, hip-shaking mofos. I’m not sure enough time would have elapsed for me to set any teenage diary entries free into the internet after only 8 years so that wins her extra cringe points. 

If anyone else out there feels brave enough to do some diary oversharing with me then get in touch via the ‘Share your own diary‘ page. 

Over to Isabella…

Le bye!
Tess x]

Well, here you go. Two of my teenage ramblings, dedicated to my then-obsession My Chemical Romance. I absolutely adored them, and literally cried for three days when they broke up. I also can’t believe I used to write like this – apparently I was channeling Georgia Nicholson a lot (Angus, Thongs & Full Frontal Snogging by Louise Rennison). The grammar is very random and the odd bits of “French” here and there? Um… 

I was 17 in 2010 and going to gigs all over the place. I think I saw MCR 5 times, The Blackout (eventually) 11 times, and I’m currently on 7 for Green Day… 

Anyway, I hope you enjoy it! My writing has gotten a little more sophisticated over the years, and you can check some of it at my blog: Isabella Hume 

I

xx

Wednesday 24th November 2010

So Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys hit two days ago → The world will never be the same again (or certainly mine won’t). It’s amazing. My favs so far are Bulletproof Heart, Summertime, and Planetary (Go!)… they all fucking rule. Supposedly a Feb/Mar European Tour is being announced on Monday… Eeeeeeeeee! A little bit of overnight camping is in order… 🙂 *I have to get the barrier (preferably in front of Mr. F. Iero… ♥)

Le sigh…

In other news… my mother thinks I am going off the rails. Yay. Dad is back to his cantankerous old self (work does this to him). My skin has exploded into something close to a minefield. Jack B is being evasive… so and so. Yeah. CH + 4 A Levels + OU really isn’t helping my stress levels!! Gah!!!!

[insert two months worth of ramblings here]

Sunday 13th February 2011

Isabella MCR

Mel and I arrived at the LG arena at about 1.30 in the afternoon, having taken a 9.20 train from York to get us into Birmingham for 12.20. The 9.20 was the earliest we could get on a Sunday :(. We then caught a train to the NEC and met two other people from Cardiff and quickly made friends with them.

Upon stepping outside of the NEC I realised that it was pouring with rain. Excellent. Queuing for five hours in the pouring rain was really how I envisaged spending my Sunday afternoon. Anyway, ended up in the early queue (obviously) about twenty or so people back from the doors and we made ourselves comfy (as you can in the pouring rain on the concrete ground); Mel – being a brainy person – had brought bin bags for us to sit on so even though we still got wet, our bums stayed mostly dry :).

It soon got to around six and the doors opened. The way the ticket system works is a bit dumb though; you get your ticket scanned at the door and then you go wait in another little queue for someone to give you a wristband, you then have to wait to show your wristband before you actually get in. Anyhoo, got through and ran into the arena right to the centre and was one person deep from the barrier.

Unfortunately I got stuck behind two boyfriends the bane of any gig goers life. Their girlfriends were both on the barrier and they had their arms around them in a protective I’m-going-to-give-my-girlfriend-as-much-space-as-possible-and-if-anyone-
touches-her-they-die kinda way. Fuckers. That’s why I said I was only one person deep from the barrier because the girls kept turning around to suck face with their bfs so they became one thing anyway.

The Blackout (support act) were really good. I’d never seen a band with two frontmen before and I was surprised at how well it worked and how they bounced off each other so well. During The Blackout the crushing was insane and I was getting pushed from behind so much but I got one arm between two people on the barrier (one of the girlfriends being on my left which the boyfriend was not happy about). This girl kept trying to push my arm off the barrier but I don’t quite know where she thought I was going seeing as there was literally no space behind me.

At about 9.15 the house lights went down and the screams filled the place as spots of light started to illuminate the black curtain. As it got to the middle of the intro you could see silhouettes of band members beginning to appear and then as NA NA NA (NA NA NA NA) kicked in, the black curtain fell and the place blew up. I was to the left of Frank, in front of Mikey, and slightly to the right of Gerard – fantastic place to be. I have never danced or sung so hard in my life.

Notes from the show
– I got another Frank pick. A security guard gave it to me. 🙂 I’m gonna make a necklace (like a dog-tag necklace) out of the two of them I have. Although I did have a fight a girl next to me for it!
Gerard is one sexy mofo… when he shakes his hips… 🙂
– I was so mashed against the barrier. At one point I couldn’t even put my heels down without standing on the toes of the girl behind me. I have so many bruises… my inventory currently runs to: a line on my ribs, three on my thighs, two on my calbes, a load on my upper arms and one on my face.
– People kept getting pulled out over the top of me and a security guard had to keep putting his hand over my neck to protect it from flailing feet. At least nine people got pulled out over the top of me, it was insane. There were so many people getting pulled out. I got kicked in the back of the head three times. Yay. There goes my brain cells.
– The show was amazing and for how much I’m aching now, I have two Frank pics to make me feel a hell of a lot better. It was incredible… and I get to do it all again in nine days time! Newcastle here I come!

The End

An iron mark on the carpet and scally lads outside – 10th July 2000

Monday 10th This morning seemed to last for ages because the coach to take us Swing Band lot to London didn’t come until lunch so we had to do lessons. Hayley was still being a moody cow so I felt a bit sorry for Sarah when I had to leave her!

Keira Osborne, Emma Thornley, Christa East, Cat Elliot and I all claimed the back seat of the coach and had loads of room because we were by the emergency exit. The journey was really boring but I kept getting texts from Jake which helped ease the boredom every so often. Jake told me that he’s going to Florence tomorrow and should be in Prague on Friday. Then I did a quiz in someone’s Cosmopolitan magazine on my perfect holiday destination. Mine came out at Prague! How weird is that?!!

Cat sent Jake a quick message too saying she wished she was travelling around Europe and in his reply he told her that he’d happily swap with her cos he misses me! How sweet! 🙂

I sent him a message myself again later and told him not to chase any foreign girls or anything (I was only kidding) and he said, “HUH CHEEK – YOU KNOW I WOULDN’T EVER THINK ABOUT DOING ANYTHING LIKE THAT! : ( I’VE TOLD YOU BEFORE THAT I’M SENTIMENTAL! WE SHOULD BE IN THE SAME HOSTEL WE STAYED IN AT RADSTADT WITH SCHOOL.”

When we reached London, the coach driver took us all through the centre which was absolute torture for me cos there were so many signs with the word ‘Canada’ on them! We then took a wrong turning past Canada Water Station so I was reminded again of the fact Jake’s going off to be a ski instructor for 3 months! Then we went past Starbucks where we both go! 😦

I told Jake about it and he texted me back saying, “I TOLD YOU IT’S THE LITTLE THINGS… WHEN IN MCDONALD’S, FOR SOME REASON “TESS” WAS PRINTED ON THE SIDE OF BUS THAT WENT PAST! : ( V. UPSETTING! MISS YOU TOO!”

Then the realisation must have kicked in cos he then said, “WOW – SOOO WEIRD! THERE’S SO MUCH WEIRD STUFF GOING ON – NOT JUST NOW BUT ALL THAT STUFF WE LISTED IN THE DOG TOO! I’M NOT RELIGIOUS BUT SOMEONE UP THERE IS…” and then, “TRYING TO TELL US SOMETHING! WE’VE DEFINITELY GOT SOMETHING SPECIAL! TRY NOT TO GET TOO UPSET! THIS IS HORRIBLE BUT IT’LL BE OVER SOON! : ) LOVE xJx”.

When we arrived at Rotherhithe Youth Hostel we were all given our room keys. I was sharing with the people I’d been sat with on the coach plus Maeve Ackerley. The room was 219 and wasn’t too bad at all. We had an iron mark on the carpet and scally lads outside the window but the beds were cool! There were 2 sets of 3 and they were sort of all piled up. I got the top bunk on mine!

Millennium Dome '00 Tess

The cool beds and our cool Swing Band attire.

We didn’t do much all evening. We were either in our rooms or at the bar. Henry Rockwell fancies Maeve quite a lot so he was in our room most of the time too!

I had some last night messages from Jake on the subject of Canada. He said he’d love me to go and see him while he’s there and I said I wish I could but I can’t really see it happening. Then he said, “I REALLY WANT YOU TO COME BUT IT’S A LONG TIME TIL I GO! IF THERE’S ANY WAY YOU COULD COME IN FEB HALF TERM THEN I’M TAKING YOU! YOU WOULDN’T HAVE TO STAY IN MY ROOM ALL OF THE TIME… JUST SOME OF IT!”

That would be so good cos I can’t possibly last 3 months without him and not go mad or something but it’d be expensive and I’ve got college and stuff. I suppose we’ll have to see.

Bye!

SHE IS NOT MY BEST MATE!!! – 7th July 2000

Friday 7th I didn’t go to college again because I seem to have scarlet fever or something now!

Sarah came round too cos she was skiving college (hope she doesn’t catch it!) to avoid Hayley who’s still being her bitchy little self! It’s all over Hayley reading a bit out of Sarah’s diary about her being hypocritical an also something about Lena and then went round telling everyone which is totally out of order.

Sarah’s very rightly annoyed with Hayley and Hayley’s annoyed with Sarah for being annoyed with her. Follow?! Now I’ve been dragged into it somehow cos Hayley’s been slagging me off to various people, saying how a best mate should be loyal and stick by her and stuff. She’s just trying to shift the guilt onto someone else cos she knows she’s the one that’s wrong but:

  1. I’ve not said a word about it to her since it all started so how does she know I’m being disloyal? (As it happens, I’ll be siding with Sarah on this one if she brings it up!)
  2. SHE IS NOT MY BEST MATE!!! It’s all in her head! Twisted cow!

Anyway, Sarah and I spent the day happily distorting photos of Hayley’s face on the computer! 🙂

I’ve had loads of messages from Jake today. I sent the first one asking what he was doing and he told me, “I’M SITTING ON A VERY LONG TRAIN JOURNEY TO ROME! IT’S NOT THAT HOT TODAY BUT IT’S REALLY BORING! DO YOU FEEL ANY BETTER?? FEEL AWFUL COS I’M NOT WITH YOU! LOVE xJx”.

I then told him that if he was with me then he’d only end up catching it but he said, “I WOULDN’T MIND CATCHING IT IF IT MEANT I COULD SEE YOU! YOU WOULDN’T BE ABLE TO KEEP ME AWAY FROM YOU! LOVE YOU! x”.

I then pointed out that in 2 weeks’ time I should be in Valkenburg and his reaction was, “YIPPEEE! CAN’T WAIT! YOU BETTER GET WELL BEFORE THEN! HOLLAND SEEMS SO FAR AWAY – IN DISTANCE AND TIME! WANT IT TO HURRY UP – LOOKING FORWARD TO IT SOOO MUCH! xJx”.

I sent him another after that saying how I had a concert at the Parr Hall with Swing Band tonight but it took him a while to reply. He said, “SORRY I  HAVEN’T REPLIED – JUST GOT TO CHARLIE’S AUNT’S HOUSE IN ROME! DON’T DO THE CONCERT – I WANT YOU TO GET BETTER – STAY IN AND REST! : ) NOT BEEN A WEEK YET!…” Then I got the same one again and then another similar one. He must have thought it hadn’t sent! He said, “SORRY I HAVEN’T REPLIED – JUST GOT TO ROME! DON’T DO THE CONCERT – I WANT YOU TO GET BETTER SO REST INSTEAD! : ) THIS IS THE 1ST FRI NIGHT WITHOUT YOU FOR AGES!! : ( xJx”.

Then almost straight away I got, “HAH! FORGOT TO SAY – THIS AMERICAN GIRL ON THE TRAIN WAS READING THIS SOPPY ROMANTIC NOVEL AND THE MAIN CHARACTER WAS CALLED TESSA! SHE KEPT READING BITS AND LAUGHING AT ME x”.

After I’d done with the concert (which was okay) I sent him another message asking why she’d been laughing and telling him what I’d just done for Swing Band. I also mentioned Hayley being a cow. He said, “TOLD YOU NOT TO! CHARLIE IS LAUGHING COS HE MISSED IT! SHE WAS LAUGHING COS IT WAS SO SOPPY – SHE SAID I WAS THE MAN IN IT! THEY THOUGHT IT WAS REALLY NICE THAT…” then, “WE SEND MSGS TO EACH OTHER ALL THE TIME! HAYLEY IS TWISTED! HOW DO YOU KNOW HAYLEY’S ANNOYED WITH YOU? FROM SARAH? x”.

I told him that Gethin, Freda and Henry Rockwell had all told me that she’d been slagging me off. Then he said, “OHHH THINGS AREN’T GOING YOUR WAY AT THE MINUTE ARE THEY?! YOU’RE ILL, HAYLEY’S BEING A BITCH AND I’M HUNDREDS OF MILES AWAY : (…” then I got a really nice one which cheered me up saying, “I MAY BE ALL THE WAY IN ITALY BUT I’M WITH YOU ALL THE TIME, JUST LIKE YOU’RE WITH ME ALL THE TIME – IN MY HEART AND ON MY MIND… PERMANENTLY! : ) LOVE YOU LOTS! xJx”.

That was very soppy but very sweet! I bet he was reading a romantic novel himself on that train!

I agreed with him that things aren’t going my way and told him that I now seem to have a scarletina type thing, and he said, “PLEASE PLEASE TELL ME YOU’RE JOKING! SCARLET FEVER?? : ( HAVE YOU BEEN TO THE DOCTOR’S? I’M REALLY REALLY SORRY I’M NOT THERE FOR YOU! xxx JAKE xxx”.

I told him that he didn’t have to apologise cos I wouldn’t see much of him even if he was here cos I’m ill so he said, “I’M SORRY – JUST IT’S NOT A NICE THING TO HAVE! : ( : ( THIS IS ALL SOOO BAD! : ( : ( I’D BETTER LET YOU SLEEP THEN! HOPE U FEEL BETTER AS SOON AS POSSIBLE! ALL MY LOVE! x”.

I then told him that I didn’t want to sleep so to keep texting (unless he did) and I told him not to feel bad. He sent me 2 back saying, “I WORRY COS YOU’RE THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IN MY LIFE! : ) IF I WASN’T – I’D BE WORRYING ABOUT HOW THE HELL I’M GETTING BACK TONIGHT – I’M LOST IN THE MIDDLE OF ROME! xJx”. Then, “OH! AND I DON’T NEED SLEEP SO KEEP TEXTING AND I’LL ASSUME YOU’VE FALLEN ASLEEP WHEN I DON’T GET ANY MORE! LOVE YOU! x”.

I then told him I was a bit worried about him once he’d said he was lost but he said, “HAH – DON’T WORRY ABOUT ME! CHARLIE IS GONNA LEAD US HOME… HE HOPES! NO DON’T MIND IF YOU HIT HAYLEY AT DENNY’S – YOU WOULD BE V. POPULAR! R U GONNA GO FEELING LIKE THIS?? LOVE xJx”.

I told him that I AM going to Denny’s cos I’ve missed out on enough already while I’ve been ill! I also told him that Ed reckons I’ve got ‘missing Jakey sydrome’ and Jake said, “WELL DON’T MAKE YOURSELF ANY WORSE! IF THAT’S ALL YOU’VE GOT – THAT’S OK! YOU’VE ONLY GOT 2 MORE WEEKS THEN YOU’LL BE FINE! MY BATTERY MAY DIE SOON – SO DON’T WORRY…” then, “IF I DON’T REPLY – I HAVEN’T BEEN RUN DOWN BY A CRAZY ITALIAN MAN ON A SCOOTER! LOTS OF LOVE… AGAIN! xJx”.

Later on at about 12:15 am, I got another message saying, “JUST GOT BACK! AND FOUND A PLUG SOCKET! HOW’S ABOUT YOU’RE ALLOWED TO WORRY ABOUT ME AS LONG AS I CAN WORRY ABOUT YOU? ALL I CAN THINK ABOUT IS…” and then, “YOUR CUTE LITTLE FACE, YOUR LOVELY EYES AND SCRUNCHED UP NOSE ALL LOOKING AT ME! THERE’S NOTHING I WOULD CHANGE ABOUT YOU! – YOU’RE JUST PERFECT! REALLY DO LOVE YOU.”

That was very nice to read but I pointed out that right now I’ve got a pink little face, a stuffed up nose and I can’t look at anything properly cos my eyes won’t focus! I also told him not to be put off by that though! He replied, “AHH! YOU’RE JUST SO SWEET! I CAN JUST PICTURE YOU NOW! WOULDN’T BE PUT OFF – EVER! I KNOW I SAY IT ALL THE TIME – BUT YOU’RE JUST TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE – YOU REALLY ARE!”

I don’t think anyone else would agree! I don’t actually know what I’ve done to make him think that either cos I wouldn’t have thought I’m anything special! I told him that I thought it was the other way round and he said, “WELL WE’RE BOTH REALLY LUCKY THEN! I THINK WE’RE MEANT TO BE TOGETHER! I’M LYING IN BED LISTENING TO THAT LONESTAR SONG – THE LYRICS SUM UP EXACTLY HOW I FEEL! xJx”.

That’s really weird cos I thought that and I told him that. He then said, “WOW! WE ARE MEANT TO BE TOGETHER! I LISTEN TO IT EVERY NIGHT! IT’S A BIT DEPRESSING NOW THOUGH!” That really is freaky cos it used to be one of the ones I listened to a lot at night until he went away cos it was depressing!

I asked him if he was joking and told him that! He said, “NO I’M NOT JOKING! : ) OHH I REALLY CAN’T WAIT 2 WEEKS! BETTER GO TO SLEEP NOW THOUGH – DON’T WANT TO BUT I’M AN HOUR AHEAD AND HAVE A BUSY DAY TOMORROW! I’LL PHONE YOU! x”. That was the last message I got tonight.

Looks like I’ll have to get a new diary then. I’ll probably use this purple hardback notebook I think I’ve got. See you there!

CYMERA_20180424_180802-1.jpg

Sad, pathetic, childish, twisted little cow – 6th July 2000

Thursday 6th I didn’t go to college again today cos I’m feeling rotten again. 😦 I think kickboxing finished me off last night, even though it was good!

I’ve had quite a lot of messages today (I’m writing smaller cos I’ve not got many pages left!) off Jake. I had a couple from last night too saying, “HELLO! HAVE YOU GONE/DID YOU GO K’BOXING? DID YOU SEND THE NAME OF THAT PLACE IN HOLLAND? WANNA KNOW IF MY MSGS ARE WORKING COS I’M IN ITALY NOW! LOVE xJx”.

I told him I wasn’t feeling too great and that I’d get the address of where we’re staying in Holland for him soon. He said, “OK! I’LL LET YOU RECOVER IN PEACE! ON OUR WAY TO PISA NOW – I’LL TRY NOT TO FALL OFF THE LEANING TOWER! NIGHT NIGHT!!! : ) LOADS OF LOVE!!! xxx JAKE xxx”.

I then sent him a msg this morning asking what he was up to. He told me, “I’M LOOKING ROUND THE LEANING TOWER – DON’T WORRY I WON’T BE FALLING OFF – YOU CAN’T GO UP NOW! IT IS TOO HOT! WISH YOU WERE HERE TOO! : ( LOVE YOU LOTS N LOTS!!! xJx”.

I then asked if Charlie had that address and I also told him I got woken up this morning by a magpie pecking at my window! He said, “I SPENT LAST NIGHT SLEEPING ON A TRAIN PLATFORM – I’M V. TIRED SO DON’T MENTION SLEEP! HE’S GOT IT BUT IT’S AT THE BOTTOM OF HIS BAG AND WON’T GIVE IT ME!! LOVE xJx”.

I asked if he really needed the address if Charlie already had it and that I hoped I felt better for Holland. He said, “IF HE’S LOST IT OR SOMETHING THEN I’LL LET YOU KNOW! HE RECKONS IT’S A HOTEL THOUGH?? YOU GOTTA GO – IF NOT, I’M COMING HOME TO SEE YOU! LOVE YOU!!! : ) xJx”.

I asked if it mattered if it was a hotel and he said, “RIGHT WELL I’M STOPPING THERE WHETHER IT’S A CAMP SITE OR THE RITZ!…” and then, “THIS IS LIKE HAVING PART OF ME TAKEN AWAY FROM ME – MISS YOU LIKE CRAZY! : ( SOOO GLAD I’VE GOT THAT PHOTO!! I LOOK AT IT ALL THE TIME! LOVE YOU TO BITS!!! xJx”.

I said I hoped he wasn’t looking at the one Gethin gave him of me looking stoned in a Santa hat all the time and he told me, “NO – ALTHOUGH IT MAKES ME LAUGH, THE ONE YOU GAVE ME IS MUCH NICER! AND WE ARE TOGETHER ON IT! : ) WISH WE HAD GOT TOGETHER EARLIER THOUGH…” and then, “THEN I WOULD BE ON THE ‘STONED’ PHOTO! IF I WASN’T HAPPY ALREADY – I’D GIVE ALMOST ANYTHING TO BE SO! UURRRGHH! : ( NOT FAIR! xJx”.

Christmas '99 Tess stoned Santa

Later I told him that I’d just dreamt we were both in college and he said, “WISH THAT DREAM WAS TRUE! EVEN IF I HAD TO BE IN COLLEGE! IT’S NOT ME PHONING YOU! I’VE JUST FINISHED WASHING ALL MY CLOTHES – I’M WORN OUT NOW!…” (someone phoned the house and hung up when I answered) and then, “I CAN’T STOP THINKING ABOUT YOU!! THAT’S A GOOD THING IN THAT IT SHOWS HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU! : ) BUT THEN IT REALLY HURTS COS I CAN’T SEE YOU AND GIVE YOU A HUG! : (“.

This evening I’ve had a few more messages saying, “HELLO! WHAT ARE YOU UP TO? JUST BEEN FOR A MEAL – WE’RE WANDERING ROUND DOING NOTHING NOW! ACTUALLY THE ONLY WAY I CAN PARTLY TAKE YOU OFF MY MIND…” then, “IS BY STUFFING MY FACE FULL OF REALLY NICE FOOD! NOT THAT I WANT TO TAKE YOU OFF MY MIND COS YOU’RE A V. NICE THING TO HAVE ON YOUR MIND! LOTS OF LOVE!!! xJx”.

I told him I was lying on the sofa, wrapped up in my duvet, looking very pink (cos I’ve developed a temperature) and feeling very miserable cos he’s so far away! He replied, “AAAGGHH! ARE YOU NOT GETTING ANY BETTER THEN? : ( I JUST WISH I COULD CUDDLE UP TO YOU NOW! – JUST CLOSE YOUR EYES AND DREAM ABOUT IT! ARRAN SAID…” then, “HE AND ALI ARE GOING BACK TO CALAIS ON THE TRAIN AND THAT ED COULD GO WITH THEM WITH MY TICKET! : ) HE IS REALLY MISSING HIS GIRLFRIEND TOO! LOVE YOU! xJx”.

I’m going to be disappointed if Jake can’t get the coach back with us now. Mind you, I usually end up looking really rough after travelling for a long time so maybe it’s not such a good idea!!

Hayley’s being a right bitch to Sarah. If I had more energy I’d explain and then slag the hell out of the lanky whore but I need sleep so I’ll do it another day if I decide it’s not a waste of ink and paper cos everyone knows what a sad, pathetic, childish, twisted little cow she can be!!

Bye!