Just cos he’s got a microphone, he think he’s God! – 20th to 30th November 2000

Monday 20th The subject of 5 came up between me and Jake again tonight. Neither of us want to wait much longer but we don’t seem to believe each other when we say we’re sure.

For example, I got a message saying, “YOU SAID THAT YOU THOUGHT I DON’T WANT TO DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT – THAT I’D RATHER WAIT! WELL, I DON’T WANT TO WAIT! : ( IF YOU DON’T WANT ANYTHING TO HAPPEN THEN YOU SHOULD TELL ME! I’LL UNDERSTAND IF YOU’RE WORRIED OR WHATEVER! I REALLY CAN’T WAIT! xJx”.

Bye!

P.S. I’ve just got another message from Jake saying, “OF COURSE I AM! YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT I BOTTLE THINGS UP! I NEVER REALLY ADMIT TO STUFF LIKE BEING WORRIED! REMEMBER AT HAYLEY’S SISTER’S? YOU COULD HAVE SAVED ME A LOT OF WORRYING BY LETTING ME KNOW NOTHING COULD HAPPEN – EVEN IF WE WANTED TO! WHY DO YOU THINK I WOULDN’T LET YOU LOOK IN MY BAG! I FELT SO STUPID! OK SO WE WOULDN’T BE IN AS MUCH OF A HURRY IF I WASN’T FOR ME LEAVING BUT BY ANYONE’S STANDARDS WE’VE BEEN VERY SLOW! WE SHOULD HAVE DONE IT BEFORE NOW – REGARDLESS OF ME GOING ANYWHERE! LOVE xJx”.

I feel really guilty about Hayley’s sister’s now!

Wednesday 22nd Kickboxing was really good tonight and the instructor said to me, “Good girl! At least one of you knows what you’re doing!” and then later, “That was very good! How come you’re better than the rest of them?!”

Cool!

Bye!

Monday 27th Other than my hand still being numb, I discovered a lump on my back last Thursday. What now?!

Jake, Abby, Connor and I all went to Chester Zoo today cos college had an inset day and we had nowt to do. It was really good! There were baby orangutans and a baby elephant but we all agreed the meerkats were the best!

When we got home, Jake told me I’m gorgeous and that the gap in my teeth is sexy! I think not!

Bye!

P.S. I had a message from Jake saying, “DO YOU KNOW WHAT THE WORST THING ABOUT THIS IS? WHEN I GET BACK IT’S GOING TO BE DIFFERENT THAN IT IS NOW! EVERY TIME I THINK ABOUT IT IT JUST CUTS ME UP! I LOVE YOU SO SO MUCH! I DON’T WANT TO LOSE YOU, EVER! xJx”.

Tuesday 28th I did the pub quiz at The Coach and Horses with Hayley, Sarah, Georgia and Floyd. Big Paul does it and it’s crap! Just cos he’s got a microphone, he think he’s God!

Bye!

Wednesday 29th Kickboxing was good again. Dave (the instructor) tapped me on the shoulder and said, “Not bad! But then you’re the best one of the quartet!” The quartet is me, Abby, Evie and Debbie F.

Bye!

Thursday 30th I was sooo pleased this morning because I went to check the UCAS website to see if they’d put my Leeds offer up (they want B, C and C) and I looked and it said I had 2 conditional offers from Huddersfield, both for 14 points! That’s where I really want to go, partly because Jake’s going there (he wants me to as well) so I went to phone him straight away.

My good mood went away pretty quickly because nobody seemed all that pleased for me. I thought they knew how much I want to go there.

Bye!

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He thinks the gap in my teeth is sexy! – 15th to 17th November 2000

Wednesday 15th I’ve had 2 offers from universities! It was really good opening the letters to find out they want me! I got them from:

Hull > Conditional offer > 12 points
Sheffield > Conditional offer > grades B, C and C

Bye!

Thursday 16th I got a letter from UCAS today to say they’ve received 2 application forms from me. I phoned them up and they confirmed it. Apparently someone’s sent them the copy that should be in college too!

Jake told me thought that he thinks the gap in my teeth is sexy! I don’t think so!

I’ve got a cold. 😦

Bye!

Friday 17th  The college all went in school uniform today for Children In Need cos it was non-uniform day for the school!

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[Left to right: Back – Suzie, me, Sarah and Cat. Karen. Front – Isaac and Hayley.]

My voice has gone funny but Jake told me it’s nice husky (cos of my cold!) and then that I’m beautiful and then that he liked my hair how I wore it with my uniform (in 2 small bunches!).

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Bye!

It’s my 18th birthday today!! – 12th November 2000

18

Part of Auntie G’s present →

Lottery

Yes, that’s right, it’s my 18th birthday today!! I’ve got loads of money and loads of presents!! Jake bought me a pink Quiksilver jacket that I’ve like for ages, I got lots of little presents off Mum, Dad and Abby and jewellery off everyone in Wick.

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[Sporting my pink coat at a later date with Abby and Rhian in Wick.]

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[Still got the box decorated by Mum and filled with 18 little presents. It’s now one source of hideous teenage photos that I add to these posts.]

Jake and I somehow ended up in Chester just wandering round. It was a bit boring, rainy and cold but very nice!

Bye!

At least 3 of them were very, very fit! – 8th to 11th November

Wednesday 8th I went to the doctor’s again today and he thinks it’s a trapped nerve, possibly caused by me banging my elbow on something. I’ve got to go back in 2 weeks if it doesn’t improve. He mentioned something about nerve conduction tests. They don’t sound too good!

I missed half of college today cos I couldn’t write.

Bye!

Friday 10th

TicketTicket

I got this ↑ from Mr Smith’s nightclub in Warrington plus 8 of these:

Ticket

[They had such a strict over 18s policy that they invited me on a night when I was still 17. Good old Smith’s!]

So, a load of my mates and I went tonight. Jake didn’t come cos he hates it there but I wasn’t that bothered. It’s more fun with just my mates. Quite a few people didn’t get in in the end but all my main friends did.

I really enjoyed myself! I had loads of lads trying it on with me (and at least 3 of them were very, very fit!) but I rejected them all, of course!

Bye!

Saturday 11th Work was awful today! Q (a chef) was being a right bastard as soon as I arrived and then I kept dropping things cos of my hand being numb.

I saw Jake for a bit and Auntie G and Grandma S came to visit.

Bye!

He stabbed me with a needle – 3rd to 7th November

Friday 3rd Jake drove me round to the doctor’s this morning because I’ve had a numb right hand since Wednesday. I first noticed it when I was washing my hair. It’s really weird and, cos I can’t feel my hand properly, it takes me ages to write stuff.

The doctor twisted my hand about a bit, he stabbed me with a needle and he told me it looks like I’ve irritated a nerve. I’ve got to take Ibuprofen for a while.

It was the garden centre bonfire and firework display tonight at the garden centre itself so, because Abby’s boyfriend works there, Jake and I were allowed to go. It was good but it rained a lot!

Bye!

Monday 6th My hand’s got really bad and I can’t keep up with my note taking in college and it’s such a mess.

I’m worried!

Bye!

Tuesday 7th I didn’t go to college today cos I’m not getting anything done and Mum thinks it might help if I don’t write for a bit cos it could be making it worse.

I went to see Coyote Ugly at the Trafford Centre cinema with Jake tonight. It was quite good actually but Jake obviously fancied the main character in it!

Bye!

Cat was pissing us off beyond belief! – 29th & 31st October 2000

Sunday 29th This morning, we dumped out bags at Victoria Station so we could wander round for the day until our flight. We all split up again, this time it was just me, Jake and Floyd. The others went shopping but the rest of us decided that we’d let Floyd see all the sights cos he’s not been before. Plus, Cat was pissing us off beyond belief!

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We went to Westminster, Buckingham Palace, Trafalgar Square, the Thames, Pizza Hut and then Covent Garden cos Jake wanted to go in Starbucks. After that, we went back to Victoria, got the coach, got the plane and came home. Jake and I didn’t want to!

Bye!

Tuesday 31st Jake and I went to see Billy Elliot at the cinema tonight. It was sooo good! When he left for the Royal Ballet School though, it made me think of Jake leaving for Canada so it upset me a bit.

Jake and I both ended up in floods of tears in the Trafford Centre car park for about 45 minutes cos we’re really dreading being spit up. He kept telling me he loves me and cares for me and has never loved anyone before so it’s not fair.

When I got in, I had a message from him saying, “I LOVE YOU!!! YOU’RE SO SPECIAL – NOT JUST COS YOU MAKE ME CRY! I DON’T LIKE CRYING BUT IF IT’S WITH YOU – THAT’S OK! LOTS OF HUGS + KISSES! WISH I COULD BE THERE TO GIVE THEM TO YOU! NIGHT NIGHT!!! SWEET DREAMS! LOVE YOU… FOREVER… LOTS! : ) xxx JAKE xxx”.

The after that I got, “REMEMBER IN THE DOG ONE NIGHT WE BOTH ASKED THE MAGIC 8 BALL IF WE’D BE TOGETHER FOREVER? WELL I HOPE WE ARE! THE LAST 8 + A BIT MONTHS HAVE BEEN THE HAPPIEST 8 + A BIT MONTHS OF MY LIFE! I REALLY THINK WE ARE MEANT TO BE TOGETHER! WE BOTH LIKED EACH OTHER AND NOT WE LOVE EACH OTHER! : ) NIGHT NIGHT TESS!”

Ohh, he’s so sweet!!

Bye!

They were making dodgy noises ALL NIGHT! – 28th October 2000

Saturday 28th We went to the Rotherhithe Youth Hostel first this morning so we didn’t’ have to carry all our bags around with us. While we were there, Cat announced that we were going to the Tate Modern and we would spend at least 3 and a half hours there! Funnily enough, the rest of us weren’t all that keen on the idea!

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[Arriving at Rotherhithe Youth Hostel with all my possessions in one plastic bag, it seems. Left to right – Gethin, Floyd, Lizzie, Jake and me.]

 

If that Millennium Bridge thing hadn’t been shut cos of the wobble then Lizzie, Mike, Jake and I would probably have gone into the Tate Modern so we could cross it. Instead, the 4 of us took a sudden interest in St Paul’s Cathedral until Gethin and Cat were out of site then we pretty much legged it! We did ring just to let them know we’d “lost” them though!

First we went to Hamley’s cos Jake wanted to go in for some reason and then Camden Market. I like it there. If you get bored, you can just do a bit of people-watching! We wandered round for ages and it was chucking it down with rain. We brought some stuff e.g. a lighter saying “tosser” on it for Gethin as an apology for putting him through the Tate Modern experience with Cat!

After getting a bit lost in Camden trying to find the tube station, we headed for Notting Hill just to have a look. We took 2 steps out of the station and went back to Rotherhithe cos the weather was awful and we were soaking.

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As soon as the other 2 got back they pissed the rest of us off (especially Cat) cos they’d been looking through our shopping and Gethin told us he’d seen his present when we gave it him. I had a bit of a go at them cos no-one else bothered and Jake told me later that Lizzie said she likes me cos I say what I think. Perhaps that’s not always a good thing though!

We all got a bit drunk later (except Cat who got VERY drunk!) so it was quite funny. Cat phoned up Crown Cars taxi firm in Warrington and asked for a taxi to Clapham Common! The bloke played along with it so it was really good! She also phoned ABBA Cabs and asked for Bjorn but the woman just told her to grow up!

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[Lizzie’s lovely legs.]

Rotherhithe has a reputation for being a bit of a dodgy area apparently so when we saw 2 scally lads outside, we weren’t surprised. Lizzie, Cat, Gethin and I went to the window to have a look but when I moved away, they were telling the others to get me back to the window. Jake got all protective even though I stayed away and shoved me further into the room. He sulked for a bit and then apologised, saying he just doesn’t like other lads looking at me like that.

Cat didn’t move out of Floyd’s bed even when the lights went out and they were making dodgy noises ALL NIGHT! It was so annoying (and a bit disgusting)! However, Jake and I wouldn’t have slept much anyway. The usual 3 happened and then 4. It was very good! Afterwards, we were just lying there and he said it was better than he expected. I’m not sure if he was referring to what he’d just done or the trip in general but, whichever, I agree!

Bye!