I’d told her about 50 million times – 14th January 2000

Friday 14th My first text message of the day was quite a nice one from ?Mark. It said, “HELLO DARLING, HOW’S MY LITTLE GEM? I’VE JUST WON £300 IN WORK – NICE BIG PISS UP TONIGHT THEN!” The thing is that I think it was actually for Sarah.

I skived my first 2 lessons today. I missed Miss P’s Sports Studies lesson because they were doing a surprise practical lesson. We were going to do it for a Xmas treat but the teachers have only just managed to organise it. I didn’t fancy doing it so I went to the primary school to help my mum.

I missed Mr B’s lesson too cos that’s also Sports Studies and he’d want to know why I hadn’t been in 1st thing. I found out later that they’d had a game of kibadi (if that’s how you spell it!) [it’s not] because every lesson, someone manages to mention it. It’s become a bit of a joke.

Freda was really, really pissing me off this afternoon. She was in one of her lesbian moods and kept hugging me and stuff and saying disgusting things! She actually texted me an apology later this evening.

Floyd Miller now fancies Sarah. He’s gone off Karen now, you see!

Hayley, Sarah and I went to LA Bowl (AGAIN! AAARRGGHHH!!!) tonight. Andy and ?Mark came too. Stu turned up for a while but left again with his girlfriend. I really honestly don’t care much.

I talked to ?Mark most of the night. He, Sarah and I were finding it really boring but Hayley wouldn’t leave. We intended to get the last bus home so we could go in the Coach Horse or somewhere but Hayley whinged until we gave in.

The taxi was booked for 11:00 pm but when it came, Hayley and Andy had disappeared. We rang her and she said she was coming but she took at least 5 minutes. So, Sarah and I were pissed off with Hayley and ?Mark was pissed off with Andy.

Hayley was annoying me on the way home because she kept apologising every 5 seconds and asking if I was speaking to her even though I’d told her about 50 million times that I don’t do not speaking. Sarah and I have decided we’re going to the pub next weekend, with or without Hayley.

?Mark’s alright actually. He looks like a bit of a scally but he’s okay really.

I sent Amir a message cos I was bored. It said, “HI AMIR! HAS LIZZIE TOLD U? I’VE DECIDED THAT I REALLY AM IN LOVE WITH U BUT THAT MIGHT JUST B COS I’VE BEEN UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF BOREDOM! C YA. LUV TESS X J” I didn’t get a reply. I hope he wasn’t insulted by it.

BYE!

Loot (+ Pillage!) – 12th & 13th January 2000

Wednesday 12th The Hayley-Andy situation is not too good again. He’s told her she’s too pushy and sends too many text messages and phones too much. I very nearly told her to stop ringing him after about the 8th time the other day for the very reason that it might annoy him but I decided against it because of Hayley’s temper.

Sarah has also decided that ?Mark’s a creep so she’s stopped texting him. I am doing it on her behalf again. He actually wanted us to go bowling tonight but we couldn’t. Well, this has all blown any chance I had of seeing Stu again.

I went skiing after school today but unfortunately it was only to the dry ski slope in Runcorn. We are being prepared for the school ski trip to France in February. I’ve done it before because I went to Austria with school 2 years ago (it doesn’t seem that long!) so I could manage pretty well but Abby was having trouble!

I got my white belt at kickboxing tonight. I’m dead proud of it! It’s not very impressive (or scary!) when you say you’re a white belt but I don’t care. I think it’s cool!

BYE!

P.S. ?Mark says he’s known Stu since he was 6. Aaah!!

Thursday 13th In the room I hang round in at college, someone’s brought in a white board and people started putting daft advertisements about each other up. At the top it says “Loot (+ Pillage!)” for a title and then the adverts say stuff like:

In the lost and found section there was stuff like:

  • Lost:- Virginity. If found please contact me on…

There were 2 that included me:

  • Tess wanted for carpet-licking contest! Please contact Freda on 07876 ******.
  • Vicious rumours + bitchyness by Tess on 07876 ******.

One about Lizzie was done in hope that she’d get the hint. It said:

Hearing problems? Contact Lizzie Bond got constant repetitions until you die of boredom. Tel: 07900 ******.

I thought it was a bit mean but it didn’t work, anyway.

Hayley sent a message to Andy last night and Stu was replying to them. Then she told him I fancied him and he said he had a dog called Tess. Today she got a message off Andy saying that Stu is bisexual with a girlfriend. Bloody typical!! Sod him then!

I’ve been sending messages to ?Mark for Sarah today. He said he likes blondes but brunettes are sexier. Good! That’s what I like to hear! I also told him later on that I don’t fancy Stu, just to try and save any embarrassment.

Lizzie sent me a message before. She’s been talking to Damon and he said Leon’s got a new girlfriend. We don’t know her but she’s a friend of David’s. I’m not sure which David they mean though. There was still a slight him of jealousy there!

BYE!

It’s just bloody typical – 9th & 10th January 2000

Sunday 9th Andy’s broken it off with Hayley. She was in tears on the other end of the phone to me before saying how she didn’t understand. I feel really sorry for her actually. It’s just bloody typical, isn’t it?! Just as things seem to be going well, everything changes for worse. She said he wanted to meet in her village today but she was doing something else and couldn’t so he told her to just forget it and said that they weren’t really suited anyway.

I’m also pretty gutted cos this means that I probably won’t see Stu again. I really like him too. I was disappointed when I woke up this morning cos I dreamt I was actually going out with him!

Amir apparently didn’t say much on the text message subject at swimming today. So that’s another thing that’s ended, my contact with Amir.

My calling credit ran out completely on my phone today so I’ve got the bloody Vodafone woman nagging me to arrange a top up now.

BYE!

10th January I want driving lessons. The problem is that I can’t afford them myself and I feel guilty letting Mum and Dad pay because, even though they would, they can’t really afford it either.

I’m sick of everyone around me talking about lessons they’ve had or ones they will have and asking why, if I’m 17, am I not learning to drive. I’m having to pretend to my parents that I’m not fussed because if they thought I was then they’d feel guilty and pay which’d make me feel awful too. I don’t want that.

Hayley said that she’s going to tell Andy that I fancy Stu. I don’t want her to cos if I know he knows then it’ll be really awkward if I see him again. I’d rather just let stuff happen itself if it’s going to at all, rather than be pushed into it with all the awkwardness that comes along too.

I had a text conversation with Andy’s mate Mark (who will be known as ?Mark because I don’t know his full name and there are too many Marks about). It began with a message from him saying, “R U NOT TALKING 2 ME NOW? I ONLY KNEW U WERE AT LA BOWL WHEN ANDY TOLD ME ON THE WAY HOME – SORRY!”

I then had to explain that I wasn’t really bothered because it was Sarah who was interested not me and that I’d just helped her to write the messages. He started sending her messages then which is good because she’s happy now. He told her that Andy’s a bit geeky!

Hayley said that she spoke to Stu briefly last night. He answered Andy’s phone and said he’d get him to talk but he didn’t succeed. She also reckons he texted her saying nice stuff like she was a good kisser just to make her feel better. She doesn’t think it’s the kind of thing Andy’d say. She agrees with me that Stu’s sweet.

BYE!

 

ìM Ä LìTTLé T≡×T GRƩMLìÑ – 8th January 2000

Saturday 8th I was at Grandma S’s for most of today because some woman was coming to see her about a new gas fire. I went out to LA Bowl again tonight though with Hayley, Freda, Henry Rockwell, Isaac McFarlane and Sam Allsop. We were on a lane next to a load of lads who work in the supermarket near school which included the extremely fine Jackson Leeming.

The lads who were with us went quite early which we were quite glad about cos they’re geeks and were deterring other lads.

Hayley’s Andy’s mates were there and he came later cos he was watching the Man Utd match. Andy’s not bad actually. It took a while but at the very end of the night they eventually snogged. His mates were okay too. The one who we’ve been sending messages to, Mark, isn’t nice looking really and he was with his girlfriend.

There was a really fit one whose name I can’t remember who was talking to us a bit. Hayley told Andy I fancied that one but nowt came of it. I changed my mind anyway and decided I liked Stu. He’s a bit chunky but really sweet and not actually that bad looking. Nowt happened there either though, even though Hayley told Andy I liked Stu too.

I found out Stu’s 20. He was talking to me quite a lot. He’s dead nice! He’s not usually the type I go for thought. I usually seem to go for taller and lankier. He was just lovely though!

The Amir thing’s been ended by Freda. After he sent the ‘Mike’ message, I sent one back yesterday saying, “I DID SOME RESEARCH + I KNOW U R AMIR. U OBVIOUSLY RN’T INTERESTED BUT I’M STILL MADLY IN LOVE WITH U. MY PHONE’S FUCKED UP SO TEXT ME ON THIS NUMBER. WHO’S R, D + B?” I said that part about my phone coz I thought he might send a reply to Sarah’s phone. There was no reply at all.

Lizzie sent me a message and told me to send it on to Amir to scare him coz he’d started it off. So I did. It said [Oh, bloody hell. This is going to be an arse to type.], “HéLLö ìM Ä LìTTLé T≡×T GRƩMLìÑ ÅÑD ì LìV≡ ìÑSìDé ŸØùR PHöÑ≡. ÉV≡RΫ TìMé Ýöù R≡ÄD THìS Mé$$ÄG≡ ì $HÄG ÝöùR $ìM ÇÄRD. PL≡Ä$≡ PÅ$$ M≡ öÑ 2 $HÅG MöR≡ Séχÿ SìM CÄRđS.” [That was an arse to type.]

The next thing was Freda ringing his answer service and saying, “Hi, is this Amir? Lizzie fancies you.” I then got a message from Amir saying, “R U 1 OF LIZZIES MATES?” My reply: “I MIGHT B. IT DEPENDS WHICH LIZZIE U R ON ABOUT. WHY? U R AMIR THEN?”

He sent another saying, “I NEARLY KNOW WHO U R! U R EITHER T OR F OR ANOTHER 1 OF HER MATES. HAVE I SEEN U B4? U COULD B ZOE. DO U KNOW BRETT?” Freda rang him again and left another message saying, “Hi Amir, this is F. It’s T who’s sending you the messages.”

A while later I got a message saying, “I’LL FONE U 2MORROW. I’M RESCISITATIN MY FONE!” Oh no, he must really think I like him and want him to phone! What do I say?

I also had a call earlier on from a lad asking for David but he kept asking who I was and wouldn’t answer when I asked who he was. It could’ve been Amir trying to find out so I didn’t say I was Tess.

I just sent him a message saying, “I’M SORRY! IT’S LIZZIE’S FAULT! I FEEL REALLY SHADY NOW. LIZZIE DOESN’T FANCY U BY THE WAY, THAT WAS JUST FREDA PISSING ABOUT. DID U PHONE ME EARLIER? C YA. x”. He probably won’t get it until tomorrow if his phone’s still charging.

BYE!

What a waste of a fine, fine creature – 7th January 2000

Friday 7th Freda has been slagging off Lizzie now for going on and on about Gethin in front of Sarah because it’s common knowledge that Sarah fancies him. I suppose it is a bit unfair.

The other day, Sarah started sending messages to Hayley’s Andy’s mate. Her batteries ran out yesterday so I said I’d send them from my phone because she wasn’t sure what to say either as he’s a bit pervy. The first message she sent to him was, “Roses r red, apples r green, I’ll open my legs + u can fill me with cream!” [Ew! Sarah!!] It’s dirty but so’s he. It was from a message sent to Lizzie from one of her swimmer mates yesterday. We thought it was quite good so she used it!

He replied saying something about, “Are you good?” and “Your place or mine?” So she sent another saying, “Oh believe me I am! How about somewhere in between? Roses r red, my pants r blue, I’ll take them off + let u get through!” (Sorry, I usually write out text message stuff in capitals. I forgot. I’ll do the rest how I usually do. Just thought I’d say so to save any confusion as to why I’ve changed back to capital letters.) The poem sent in that message was my creation. I was quite proud!

He sent a message back to us which h said, “FANCY YOURSELF AS A BIT OF A POET DO U? HOW OLD R U? WHAT DO U LOOK LIKE? HAVE U GOT BIG….. WHAT R URE VITAL STATS? WHAT DO U TASTE LIKE? IF U KNOW WHAT I MEAN.”

She sent another back with more poetry saying, “DO U NOT THINK I’M A GOOD POET? HERE’S ANOTHER ONE: ROSES R RED, HOMER IS YELLOW, U SOUND LIKE A SHAGGABLE FELLOW! HOW LONG IS URE…..?” (That’s Homer as in Homer Simpson.)

His reply was, “I HAVEN’T EXACTLY MEASURED IT B4 BUT I’VE NEVER HAD ANY COMPLAINTS – IN FACT ONLY COMPLIMENTS! I GUESS U’LL HAVE 2 CUM + C 4 YOURSELF!”

The next message we got from him was, “HELLO SWEETIE, HOW YA DOING? IS YOUR MATE GOING 2 HAVE ANDY?!” We sent one to him asking if he was going bowling tonight but he didn’t answer so we sent, “HEY BABE! R U GONNA ANSWER ME OR NOT? HERE COMES SOME MORE OF MY STUNNING POETRY: ROSES R RED, MY COAT IS BLACK, I WANT U TO HAVE ME FLAT ON MY BACK!” Isn’t it good?! [We clearly didn’t have enough college work at this point in time.]

He replied, “HELLO BITCH WHAT R U DOING? I’M OUT OF THAT SHITHOLE NOW. GOING 2 SLEEP COS I’M KNACKERED!!” We replied, “CHILL!! I’VE BEEN AT COLLEGE SO I SWITCHED MY PHONE OFF. WHAT’S UP WITH U? I DIDN’T REALISE U WERE AT WORK B4. SORRY. X”

He said, “WHAT COLLEGE R U AT? OH BY THE WAY I THINK WE R GOING LA BOWL 2NIGHT. NOT GOING TOWN OR DRINKING COS I’VE GOT PISSING FLU.” I sent another asking his name. He said, “MARK. ANDY’S GOT TOSILITOUS – IF THAT’S HOW U SPELL IT – + I’VE GOT FLU, MAYBE ANOTHER TIME EH – IF YOUR LUCKY!”

I’m just including these in here for future reference so I can delete them from my phone.

I went bowling tonight with Hayley, Rachael and Georgia. Everyone else went to the cinema but you can’t hang about and talk there which is why I didn’t go. 4 blokes (3 aged 21 and 1 aged 23) were on the lane next to us. Rach and I thought they were horrible and creepy but the other 2 didn’t. We went on the dodgems with them and then in the bar.

Rach and I kept our distance and so did Hayley when they got more pissed. She says she saw them passing packets to each other and they kept disappearing to the toilets and stuff. I think they were doing drugs so we went home.

Georgia snogged 2 of them before we left though. One of them was really red coz he’s been on a sunbed and said he had a white bum though. He bloody well showed us! I was glad to be rid of them. They kept saying I looked intelligent!

There were loads of fit lads there too. One of which was constantly staring at me. This time I don’t just think he was, he actually WAS staring at me! Even when I looked back he didn’t look away. As soon as he came in our direction though, the bloody taxi came!

I’ve just been informed Jacqueline’s going out with Danny Barnes. NOOOO! What a waste of a ‘fine, fine creature’ as Lizzie’d put it! BUGGER!

BYE!

Something about French kissing – 6th January 2000

Thursday 6th I went to town with Lizzie after double Geography. Geography with Adrian wasn’t too bad although he did come in saying something about French kissing and shut up when he saw there were people in the room. That made me a bit paranoid.

In town, we saw Freddie Bevan again. He had a nice mate with him. I said how I always seem to see him and he muttered something but I couldn’t tell what it was.

The message-sending to Amir’s gone a bit further today. This morning I sent him a message saying, “I TAKE IT U R NOT INTERESTED. I’M SORRY I SHOULD’T HAVE SAID ANYTHING. I JUST CAN’T HELP THE WAY I FEEL. TEXT BACK, I NEED 2 KNOW IF U R INTERESTED.” I didn’t get a reply so I kept trying to ring his phone to see if it was switched on but it wasn’t.

Later this evening, Sarah was here to get ready for Presentation Evening at school and I sent him another message saying, “I’VE BEEN TRYING TO PHONE U 2DAY. IT DOESN’T SEEM 2 GET THROUGH. IS THIS EVEN AMIR’S MOBILE? CAN U LET ME KNOW ONE WAY OR THE OTHER. LOVE U.”

Finally I got a reply. It said, “WELL THAT ALL DEPENDS ON WHO’S ASKING. TELL ME URE NAME + I’LL TELL U IF I AM. AMIR.”

I sent another one saying, “HAVE U GOT A GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND? (I HOPE NOT!) TELL ME IF URE INTERESTED + I’LL TELL U WHO THIS IS. 4 NOW, ALL U NEED 2 KNOW IS HOW MUCH I WANT U. LUV ????? xxx”

His response was, “NO I HAVEN’T GOT A GIRLFRIEND + DEFINITELY NOT A BOYFRIEND. DO I KNOW U?”

I sent one back which said, “U DO SORT OF KNOW ME. I’M SO GLAD U R SINGLE + NOT GAY! DO U REALLY WANT 2 KNOW WHO I AM? WHERE R U NOW? MY BATTERY’S RUNNING OUT SO TEXT ME ON 07876 ****** xx”. It could’ve been a mistake giving number because Leon knows it.

The reply I got said something like, “DO U KNOW LEON OR DOES URE NAME BEGIN WITH D, B OR R?” D must be Damon, B maybe Brett and maybe R Reeves.

I sent a reply saying, “HELLO AGAIN! NO MY NAME DOESN’T BEGIN WITH ANY OF THOSE LETTERS. MOST PEOPLE KNOW SOMEONE CALLED LEON. WHY? GOD, I WANT U! WHAT R U DOING 2MORROW NIGHT? LOVE U xxx.”

[God, this was daft. Why would we even start this and why would I carry it on (and record it in my diary word for word) unless I actually fancied him?]

His next reply said something like, “FUCK OFF U STUPID TWAT! I’M NOT AMIR. IF U WANT 2 MEET ME GET DOWN TO J5 LONDON (ESSEX). MIKE X”. Bollocks! It is Amir. I know because he’s told Lizzie, Leon etc. at swimming about the 1st message and then he went on about Leon, D, B and R in another one to me.

Presentation Evening was boring. I got my certificates and stuff and went in the Coach Horse for a drink with everyone afterwards.

CYMERA_20170628_180921

[In t’pub with my new sophisticated haircut.]

Emma said she wanted a word and told me that in Mr Smith’s nightclub she started dancing with someone who was bladdered and had his hands up her skirt and down her bra and she snogged him then realised it was Trotter. I said I wasn’t bothered but I am a bit.

BYE!

I still kind of want his attention – 5th January 2000

Wednesday 5th For the first day back at college after Xmas, it wasn’t actually too bad! I didn’t really see Adrian for a start, although I’ve got to face him in double Geography 1st thing tomorrow morning.

I saw Trotter from a distance and he’s got a new white coat (probably what he bought in the JD Sports sale yesterday!) which makes him look like a snowman. That’s not good.

Didn’t see much of Ollie but Charlie grinned at me.

I found out that Emma spent most of the night with Nathan at Gavin’s on New Year’s Eve. I’m not too bothered though.

Mr P noticed I’d had my hair cut and said it made me look more sophisticated. I think that was a compliment! Unusual for him!

CYMERA_20170625_200438

[Looking totes sophis that year with my shorter hair and Bacardi Breezer in hand.]

Floyd Miller fancies Karen Brent but she’s going out with Russ on Saturday to the cinema.

I was getting on quite well with Hayley today. She actually wasn’t annoying me! Also, on the phone tonight, she apologised for repeatedly not speaking to me and stuff and admitted it was because she was jealous of my friendship with Lizzie. It surprised me that she admitted it and I thought it was quite brave of her to do so. She said she was just feeling a bit left out. I think Andy’s doing her some good!

I found out that Danny Barnes’s middle name is Campbell! Ha ha!! It was on the General Studies group list on the notice board.

I was on the phone to Lizzie after school and we mentioned Amir. We’ve been ringing his mobile all day to see if he had it switched on so we’d know if he’d got his message so I decided to try it again on my mobile. I was talking away to Lizzie and I didn’t realise it’d rung until I heard a lad say, “Hello?”

I got a message from Lizzie before when she got back from swimming saying, “HA HA HA! AMIR GOT SARAH’S MESSAGE + HE WAS SAYING HE WANTS 2 KNOW WHO SENT IT. IT WAS SO FUNNY. I HAD 2 TRY SO HARD NOT 2 LAUGH + I DIDN’T.” I was the one who sent it but it was from Sarah’s phone because Leon’s got my number so Amir could’ve found out.

I feel really shady now. In a way, I want her to say that it was me. I’m not sure why though. I don’t fancy him but I still kind of want his attention. [Liar. I did fancy him.] He’s the only lad in her swimming lot who’s a possibility if I get bored, I suppose!

BYE!