I know it’s daft before I’ve even started it but the other, more sensible option is to have a dock off bonfire and I can’t quite bring myself to do that after years of writing EVERYTHING down… with diagrams.
I’m Tess and I’ve been aggressively writing ‘BYE!’ at the end of the day since 1995. A friend bought me a diary just before my 13th birthday and, 20 years on, I still keep one. And I still hide it under my wardrobe.
‘If Destroyed Still True’ (or ‘IDST’ for time-saving purposes) is something that fellow teenagers and I wrote pretty frequently after pencil case statements such as ‘Tess ♥z Dougie’ so that, if someone scratched it out, my lurve for him would not die. It was often used to annoy friends by writing it after scrawling that they fancied some prat or other. It seems like a fitting name because, even if I did burn the hell out of these diaries, everything in them will not un-happen. It will all remain very sadly true.
I wasn’t originally planning to post everything but, if I’m going to do this, I may as well do it properly and embrace the concept of overshareyness. This is now a thing. I may well regret it at some stage but, so far, my teens seemed to mainly consist of wanting to be in Pride and Prejudice, worrying about who I’d sit next to on the bus and some very mild stalking. However, there are days when something less mundane happened e.g. the day I awoke with the word ‘fallopian’ stuck in my head. Hold on to your hats.
It turns out my sister, Abby, also briefly kept a diary so hers joins mine for a little while from August 2014. She also wrote ‘bye’ every day which, to me, is evidence that she definitely read my diary.
I’m embarrassed to be me and no doubt [Future Me] will be cringing at her 30-something diaries as well. Although, I’m not as much of a stalker these days.
Ok, I’m going to do this.
Oh God. Here goes…