What does he expect?! – 20th April 2001

Thursday 20th A group of us did The Run tonight. It was all okay until Jake was talking to some of his year in The Woodman and the rest of us waited outside. Cat suggested hiding round the corner for a laugh but Jake didn’t find it very funny. He sat on a bench and when I tried to apologise, he shoved me out of the way. I was actually quite embarrassed cos he did it in front of everyone and I nearly fell over. He didn’t push me hard, I was just a bit pissed!

So, we both ended up sulking and didn’t speak. When we got to The Grey Hen, he just got up and left cos we still hadn’t said anything. I felt guilty then so I got Cat to ring him to find out where he was. He said he was walking home so I spoke to him and told him not to be so stupid and come back. He did and we sat by the old station while everyone else went in The Mossland.

We talked for a bit and apologised about the hiding and pushing thing but I could tell there was something else wrong. Eventually he told me that I care too much about what my friends think and that tonight I seemed more concerned with them than him. He said it’s not the same as before he went.

What does he expect?! I made new set of friends while he was away in the form of College 1s. I explained to him that I’m just trying to keep everyone happy but I’ve obviously not got the right balance between him and friends cos he felt neglected. If I paid more attention to him though, my mates would go all moody on me. I don’t want that either. I thought I was managing okay but he obviously feels my attention for him in lacking somewhat.

I got upset and explained I didn’t do it deliberately (apparently I was doing it before we fell out). He then got upset too cos he’d upset me! That meant we made up though. 🙂 He said he hates falling out but it’s really nice when we make up afterwards! I agree!

Bye!

She shot us some filthy looks and carried on – 18th April 2001

Tuesday 18th I had a driving lesson today. It went okay other than when I went backwards first when doing a 3-point turn!

I also got this letter from Michael Amhurst this morning. →

18-04-01 Michael letter to Tess envelope18-04-01 Michael letter to Tess

Bye!

[My looooong draft reply was in the same envelope…]

18-04-01 Tess letter to Michael page 118-04-01 Tess letter to Michael page 218-04-01 Tess letter to Michael page 318-04-01 Tess letter to Michael page 418-04-01 Tess letter to Michael page 5

NO THANKS! – 11th to 13th April 2001

Wednesday 11th I went in to wake Jake up first thing this morning. I like being able to do that! He kept saying he wanted to be in Barcelona. So do I!

Jake said in a text tonight that my Miffy pyjamas are “sooo sexy”! 🙂 He also said that I go even more cute and cuddly when I’m sleepy!

Bye!

Thursday 12th Michael Amhurst came down today. We both met up at Sarah’s house and had a look at some photos before going to McDonald’s for lunch. Jake met us there cos he stayed over at Hugo’s last night and went to Manchester with him this morning before getting the train to us.

I’m glad I got to see him cos (other than getting hugs and kisses and stuff!), I got to see the Beetle. It’s so shiny! I wish he could still drive it cos it was so good cruising around in it last summer!

Michael had a hospital appointment for something in Manchester so he dropped me and Jake off at my house on the way and then Sarah at her house.

Jake and I spent the rest of the day cuddling. Mmm!

Bye!

Friday 13th Connor, Abby and I all went to Alton Towers in Connor’s car today. We got up really early and were there by 10am. It took us a while to get there cos he kept missing turns and stuff but we got there eventually. We had to go through disinfectant when we got there cos of foot + mouth and we saw signs saying that it was an infected area. It’s horrible.

It was quite quiet at Alton Towers actually, considering it’s the Easter holidays. We went on a load of rides, most of them more than once cos the queues were fairly short. It turned out to be a really good day out actually, other than me getting the usual soaking on the River Rapids!

Jake, Lizzie and I went round to Floyd’s tonight cos everyone else was either on a gay night out in Manchester or being boring and staying in. We bought a bottle of 20/20 stuff [no.5 on this list of things we drank] and played the Truth or Dare game. I didn’t find out much about Jake but he said he was beginning to get suspicious about what I used to get up to for some reason. He did say he’d choose me over S Club Hannah in a cowgirl outfit though!

We were talking about Cat asking Floyd to wank himself off in front of her and Jake said he’d only do that for me! NO THANKS! He also said “wicked” when he thought Cat masturbated for Floyd! He’d heard it wrong!

Bye!

A 17 year old fuckwit like Hugo – 7th April 2001

Saturday 7th Jake came round at about 2pm today. We didn’t really do much, we just lay about on my bed pretty much all day. We were looking at holiday brochures and stuff and he said we’ve got to go to loads of nice places together. He was constantly telling me he loves me again 🙂 (I don’t mind!) and he couldn’t stop touching me and kissing me which was really nice.

Tess & Jake reunited

[Reunion selfie in my room.]

His mate, Hugo, rang at one point. He really is a pain in the arse! He never shuts up and drones on about really boring things like the plug sockets in his room! He slagged me off really badly before Jake went away so I’ve taken quite a dislike to the sad twat! Hugo’s obviously madly obsessed with Jake cos he just won’t leave him alone and we reckon it’s a jealousy thing that made him not like me cos they used to see quite a lot of each other before I came along, I think.

Anyway, I don’t know whether he’s had a bang on the head or what but Hugo suggested to Jake that he and I go out for dinner with him and his girlfriend, Katie. She must be a desperate cow cos she’s in her 20s and is going out with a 17 year old fuckwit like Hugo. He met her on a cruise last summer and they’re both loaded but both a bit thick, I think. He had to go to some special boarding school and she’s a beauty therapist or something.

When Jake told me what Hugo suggested, my first reaction was to yell, “Yeh right!!” and laugh hysterically but then when I thought about it, I realised that dinner with Hugo and his girlfriend would be the perfect opportunity to give Hugo his present. Ha ha!! (Evil laughter!) The present is a book entitled, “How Did I Begin?” and it all starts with a “special cuddle” between a mummy and daddy… blah blah… etc.! I’m sure you get the picture! Sarah and bought Hugo that cos he once asked Jake, “Where d’you put it, Jake?” when they were talking about “stuff” one night! Jake’s refused to even go to dinner, never mind let me present Hugo with his book!

Jake told me that in Canada, he and his mates were talking about people sleeping with each other and he jokingly used the term “special cuddle”. All the others found it really funny and apparently it got used quite a lot afterwards!

He gave me my present today. It’s a necklace thing with a few beads on it. He says you can only get them in Banff. It’s quite nice actually.

I did 3 to him and he kept undoing my bra and kissing me everywhere. He says I’ve got a really nice back! He brushed my hair too which nearly sent me to sleep! He kept saying I was cute and calling me ‘Miss Tessa Jane Simpson’! I don’t know why but it makes me smile cos it’s sweet!

He wants me to get my tummy button pierced. He said he really likes it cos it looks nice and even said he’ll pay for me to do it. I do want to, I have done for a while, but I don’t like pain or infection so I’m not too sure if I actually will!

Every time the phone rang today I expected it to be Jake for a split second, even when I was with him! It was weird!

Bye!

See you tomorrow – 5th April 2001

Thursday 5th
0 days to go!!! 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

Yey!!! The 12 weeks since Jake left is up! He’s due home tomorrow!!!! 🙂 🙂 🙂 I can’t wait to see him!

He told me that he’d phone at about 5pm today so when he hadn’t rung by 6:15pm, I decided to phone him instead cos I was bored of waiting round for a call. The bloke on the other end put me through to his room but then came back on the line saying that the phone in that room was being used. I decided to leave it cos Jake might have been on to his Dad or something. It got to about 6:55pm and he still hadn’t phoned so I rang his hotel again. This time, a woman put me through to his room, let it ring for a while then told me all the rooms were empty so they could be cleaned. She asked if I wanted to leave a message just in case Jake walked by but I didn’t.

Jake finally phoned me at about 7:10pm. He said he’d had to rush about and get out of the room so it could be cleaned. He doesn’t know why the phone was engaged though. I asked if we could go to Alton Towers at some point in the summer and he said I could go when he meets up with ski people if I want. That’s what I wanted him to say really! 🙂 He said he might go back to Banff after uni one day but not without me. He said I could get a job at the resort cos there’s loads of stuff to do. He said we’ll both have to do something when we finish uni. I hope we’re still together then! He told me he wasn’t interested in the cowgirls he mentioned in his email! I’m very glad to head that!

He kept getting all squeaky and excited when we talked about him coming home. He said he really wants a hug. So do I!

He said he can’t remember what he’s said to Rob about me. He said they just talked when they were reading emails and stuff. Rob sounds really sweet! Jake said he puts his girlfriend’s perfume on his pillow every night and that she’s sent him a bottle of homemade bubblebath but Jake broke it accidentally. Ahh!

Jake also said that his mate Dan would be a good match for Cat cos he’s sort of quiet and intelligent. That’s handy cos I intended to matchmake then if they were ever together anyway! He said he will teach me and Cat to improve our skiing if we want. We’ll see!

He said he’ll be sitting with Tom, James and Rob on the plane if he gets a choice and they’re going to play drinking games with water to pass the time!

Ahh, he said he’s actually missed Gethin! He reckons it’s cos there was nobody even a bit like him in Banff. They were all too masculine! Gethin just isn’t!

We both said, “See you tomorrow” like we’ve been wanting to do for ages! That sounds really good!

Jake said he’d text me when his phone worked at the airport but he hasn’t done yet. I hope he gets back home alright. I really can’t wait to see him!

Bye!

Today’s emails →

05-04-01 Jake email.jpg

Good boyfriend material – 4th April 2001

Wednesday 4th
1 day to go!!! 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

P. [Period]

Sarah sent Michael Amhurst an email this morning to tell him not to get his hopes up basically about anything happening between them cos she’s still not got over Maz and is hoping to see him over Easter. Not only had she wasted a good lad opportunity but the silly cow says that the Maz bit is true! I don’t believe her sometimes!

Jake rang at about 5:20 pm. He said he’ll be skiing for the last time today cos he’s not going to have time to ski tomorrow. Even though it’s their last day, Jake says they’ll all decided not to get too pissed tonight cos they don’t want to be travelling with hangovers. I wonder how many of them’ll manage to stick to that!

He told me he’s bought another pair of skis while he’s been there but said I can’t have his others very seriously when I jokingly asked. Fine!

Rob (his roommate) wanted to speak to me and so Jake put him on. He sounded nice and cheerful and said he’d heard a lot about me and seen all the photos. I pointed out that I wasn’t exactly pleased when I found out my photos were on the wall but he said they aren’t awful and that I really look like someone he knows at home. He said he’s got loads of pictures of his girlfriend too, told me it was nice speaking to me then put Jake back on.

He got excited about coming home and I told him I was still a bit worried but he said that’s probably normal cos he was worried a bit about seeing me in Valkenburg. He said he’ll understand that I’ll want to see my friends and stuff, and said that he can always see his mates who are back from uni. He said that some Dan lad from Canada lives around here so he’ll probably meet up with him too. Apparently he’s single and probably good boyfriend material so maybe some of my mates would quite like him!

Bye!

Today’s emails →

04-04-01 Jake email04-04-01 Tess email

Swearing and dancing on the tables – 3rd April 2001

Tuesday 3rd
2 days to go!!! 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

I didn’t have an email from Jake when I checked this morning but I was quite proud of myself when I didn’t worry too much! He’s said that he probably would send me one to tell me whether he’d passed or not but he didn’t.

I did begin to worry about Jake when he hadn’t phoned at 5:20 pm but he rang about 5 minutes later than that. He said he passed his assessment (and so did everyone except 2 of the older guys) and has now got a Ski Pro passport or something so he can get jobs as an instructor if he wants. He said he doesn’t intend to use it though cos he doesn’t want to leave me again.

He said they all got chucked out of a bar thing for swearing and dancing on the tables (he didn’t do that!) and then got bollocked for messing about after doing their torchlight descent in the daylight! He explained that he didn’t email me cos he went back to his room and fell asleep! He didn’t end up going out last night, even though most people did.

I think I worried him by talking about the email I sent him last night and not sounding very happy when he chirpily mentioned coming home. I don’t know why I didn’t get all excited really, I just wasn’t in the mood and I’ve got all these niggling little worries in the back of my mind. He told me he loves me 3 times after I didn’t sound happy which cheered me up a bit! 🙂

He said he’s waited 3 months to see me and so he does want to come home. He said he would never have arranged it all in the first place if he’d been with me before I did anything about it and would’ve got a job or something instead. He says he won’t get bored when he gets home cos he’s getting bored of it there anyway. We’ll see!

I got really pissed off (and then upset out of annoyance!) before cos I’d just typed out a really long email to Jake and then I somehow managed to delete it just as I was about to send it! I sent him another one once I’d calmed down!

Bye!

Today’s emails →

03-04-01 Tess email