“Do you want a cold?” – 18th December 1999

Saturday 18th The party last night was yet again quite eventful. I think I’ll begin with me. I could’ve snogged 3 lads but I managed to keep a certain amount of self-control.


[My Christmas party attire.]

First of all, there was Ollie Bramwell. He kept asking me, “Where did you get those legs?!” and saying how I should show them off around college more. I was quite flattered but I kept avoiding him. I’ve already met [snogged] him before anyway at another of Freda’s parties. Keira and I were telling him how we were going to do an Xmas strip but Davis was the one who wanted us to do it and he didn’t turn up (we wouldn’t have done anyway though!) and Ollie was trying to convince us to do it anyway.

Then there was Charlie Wilson. I’d been getting on quite well with him all night and he asked me twice to meet [snog] him. He asked indirectly by saying, “Do you want a cold?” I told him I already had one and he asked, “Do you want another one?” I refused him quite simply by saying no. After that he kept giving me hugs and later when we were sat on a sofa he said, “You can snog me if you like.” I started going on about how Cat wouldn’t be too pleased and then luckily he went home. I couldn’t have done anything with him after the amount of piss taking I did out of Cat in Belgium. I’d have been laughed at anyway.

As most people were leaving the party, Adrian Ford turned up. He kept talking to me and putting his hands on my waist as he was doing so. To start with I did my best to avoid him too but then I got bored and found out that most other people had got a snog out of the party so I thought, “Sod it” and took the next opportunity. This was when Adrian went to see if Nigel Groves was okay and he dragged me with him outside, only to find Nigel being sick around the corner.

We left him to it and headed back to the house but Adrian stopped me and we ended up meeting [snogging] each other twice. He wasn’t bad but kept hitching my skirt up and trying to get in my top so I went inside before somebody saw me.

A while later he followed me into Freda’s room and I snogged him again. This time his hand ventured but stayed on the outside of my clothes so I didn’t care! He asked if I was alright, I said yes but took the opportunity to mention that Cat (who was on Freda’s bed) might wake up so we went and he went home pretty soon after.

While I was trying to get some sleep last night, I was putting all the lads I’ve kissed into a list from best to worst! This may seem cruel but, unless they’re psychic, they won’t know. It goes:-


Now I get onto what happed with other people. This could take a while. The expected happened between Lizzie and Gethin, and Gethin made me take a photo of them mid-snog! Gethin also met [snogged] Hayley and Rachael but that was for part of a bet. To complete the bet, he also had to snog Cat and Julian Olsen which he didn’t do. He went back to Lizzie for the rest of the night and kept thanking me for pushing them together with my superb match-making skills!

He really likes her but after he’d left she snogged Anton Roper. He was creeping on to me a bit too, I forgot about that. I was stood next to him and he was rubbing his hand further and further down my back until I moved then he kept feeling my leg when I was trying to sleep on the floor.

My match-making also worked with Karen and Floyd Miller. Before they arrived I’d said I was going to do it and I kept making her sit on his knee and stuff and they ended up meeting [snogging] each other.

Emma was having stalker trouble with Neil Kennedy. He cornered her and was saying how much he loved her and gave her a diamond heart-shaped pendant. I rescued her because I came round the corner to find a drink and saw her trying to get rid of him so I started up a conversation with Emma and told him someone was looking for him. She is now seeing Orson Platt but doesn’t want to be now she’s sobered up!


[Orson & Emma]

Maisie Jones snogged Tunde S and then Adrian. I don’t care coz I don’t like Adrian like that. I was just drunk and bored!

Big Paul upset Cat by meeting [snogging] her and then buggering off with Keira.


[Big Paul & Keira]

There’s more stuff but I can’t quite remember what it is just yet!

Zoe rang me before to see if I’d go to the cinema with her, Reevesy, Brett and Ste because Hayley wasn’t going but I couldn’t because I had to go and see Grandma S.

It’s not good at Grandma’s. She’s had a bit of a fire but must have managed to put it out, her sink in the kitchen was blocked, the basin upstairs was blocked and it looks like there’s been a flood upstairs in the bathroom at one point coz all the paper on the ceilings is coming off. I got a bit upset actually because Mum’s really worried but Grandma’s being stubborn and won’t come and stay with us for a few nights until everything’s sorted.

The other thing was there was a mini explosion when Dad tried to switch the TV on. Grandma had wiped it down with water because it’d been smoke damaged. I hope she’ll be alright.


The smell was lovely and so was the man – 24th-26th July 1999

Saturday 24th We went to Bruges. It is absolutely gorgeous there. All the buildings are really old and there are canals and horses and cobbled streets. We visited a chocolate factory. The smell was lovely and so was the man giving us the talk! [Here he is…]


We went on a boat trip round the canal on which most people fell asleep! We then got to walk round where we wanted so we did.


That evening, Charlie Wilson seemed determined to get with Emma but she was determined not to let him! She really didn’t trust herself so she kept telling me to keep him away. I managed to keep sitting between them and stuff which she appreciated but he didn’t!

I ended up feeling really sorry for him and I apologised and ended up in a deep and meaningful, heart to heart conversation about why she wasn’t interested and things like that. I didn’t mind telling him but other people began to get suspicious as to why he wanted to be alone with me outside in the dark or in another corner of the room!


Sunday 25th Travelled back to England. The journey to Calais seemed fast and I bought a big bottle of Bacardi at the cash and carry. It was cheap, okay?!!

The ferry crossing was really calm and hot which was good. On a stop at a service station, Emma and I were sat by the emergency exit and as Charlie was getting out, she complained he tickled her foot. Well, on his way back on he did the same to my ankle. I didn’t mention it!

When we finally arrived back, I said my goodbyes to everyone and they all said they’d keep in touch but I don’t expect it to be honest.


Monday 26th Hayley’s phoned me 3 times today. I filled her in on stuff and she told me what I’d missed which wasn’t much. She told me she’d collected glasses in the Sports Club and had spoken to Ste Rollinson and she now knows where he lives coz she saw him in the garden or summit. She also told me that Milla Green (lottery jackpot winner’s granddaughter) is moving back from Australia to Warrington.

I have a bit of a dilemma now. I told Hayley I’d go with her so she can show me where Ste lives tomorrow maybe but then Emma rang before (which I really didn’t expect) saying that Gethin had just phoned and was going round at 1:30pm tomorrow and she wants me to go. I was the 1st person she phoned which I was pleased about and she was phoning the rest later. I dunno what I’ll tell Hayley though coz she’s bound to ring here.

I’d rather go to Emma’s, you see, and Hayley’ll be deeply suspicious that I’m going to leave her out and be best mates with Emma again. I don’t want to do that to her so she has no reason to think it but she will. I’d lie but if she found out it’d make matters worse.

This could just be a one off and Emma’ll get sick of me again once Suzanna comes back off her hols and Emma’s parents get home from theirs but I don’t want to miss anything. I just feel so guilty about Hayley coz whatever I say, she’ll think the worst. She just won’t trust me.


I’m single out of choice – 20th July 1998

Monday 20th Guess what. Yet again I’m bored. It must have summit to do with the fact that it’s raining and I have no homework.

I’ve had quite an easy day actually. I’ve been to 2 primary schools to give the Swing Band a practice before we go to Paris. This morning we went to Newlane and I had Hayley’s nieces waving and smiling at me all the way through and there was her nephew too on the front row.

In the afternoon we played at Mum’s school. This time half the school was waving at me and my mum pointed me out to her class. She also happened to be equipt with a camera.

Then Mr P made us stand up if we went there. It was good overall, even though we made a few kids cry coz we were too loud. There were loads sat there with their hands over their ears too. I thought we sounded really good actually.

I saw Ferny for the 1st time in about 2 weeks. He’s had his hair cut but is still looking as gorgeous as ever. He caught me staring at him too outside form room so I had to quickly divert my gaze to Ralph in hope that he didn’t notice.

Charlie Wilson is worrying me. He keeps smiling at me and talking to me. He’s never really bothered before.

Emma’s gone over to the pub across the road from my house this evening so she said she’d phone me later so we can sort out cinema arrangements. We’re meant to be seeing Godzilla at 6:00pm on Thursday so we need to tell people that and maybe ask a few more if they wanna come. It’s very unlikely that it’ll all go to plan, it never does.

So far there’s me, Rach, Emma, Ralph, Freddie and Graham going. I also want someone to ask Ferny. We also might get Dougie, Lena, Olivia, Lindsey, Ed and Davis to come and possible Jade and Hayley. We already know Georgia can’t come and Rach and I aren’t sure whether we want Hayley to come or not. It’s just if everyone else comes, we can’t not invite her.  Rach is just worried she’ll flirt with Graham and I’m worried she’ll get Ferny. She always comes up with a seating plan too which doesn’t involve any of the rest of us sitting with who we want to be sat with but we know that if we don’t keep her happy she’ll throw a tantrum, go depressed and will probably cry.

I know she likes Ferny though coz last time we went to the Sports Club she was regretting changing her mind and not going out with him. I reckon she’s gonna ask him out again coz she wants a boyfriend.

If I started getting all depressed like she does about not having a boyfriend I’d just remember that I’m single out of choice coz I had a chance with Ralph and didn’t take it.

Anyway, I might write again later when we’ve phoned people but I don’t reckon Emma’ll ring me. So…


P.S. Mr P’s getting married to some woman that’s been hanging round all day. He told a few people and now most people know. Yuk!

Jingle jangle silver bangle – 12th February 1998

Thursday 12th I’m going skiing tomorrow, finally! I’m not going to take this diary with me coz I will be terrified of someone getting hold of it. Instead, I’m just going to take a notebook and then I can write down roughly what happens in Austria and write it up when I come home again.

It’s Friday 13th tomorrow and everyone’s worried that we won’t make it across the English Channel. Then it’s Valentine’s Day and then it’s Charlie Wilson’s birthday on 21st Feb.

Emma told me what she’d write if she sent any Valentine’s cards. This is is:-

Jingle jangle silver bangle,
You look fit from every angle.

Then she said she was gonna put the johnny she got off Vanessa Wood in the card too. Stupid girl.

I’m really worried that I’m gonna forget summit. I mean, I’ve got tomorrow morning too coz most people going skiing are staying off ‘til 12:00 noon.

Oh well…


Emma’s not my favourite person – 16th November 1997

Sunday 16th Well, Emma’s not my favourite person today. She said she’d ring me this morning and she didn’t so (as usual) I ended up phoning her. Her sister answered so I told her to tell Emma I’d called.

I was bored all day then she phoned me this evening and said she’d been out all day with Suzanna (some mate of hers) at Charlie Wilson’s house. I was pretty annoyed. [Probably because of the whole secretly fancying him thing.] She could’ve phoned to see if I wanted to go. He only lives a couple of miles away, I cudda biked it. [No. I don’t like ‘cudda’. I don’t like it at all.]

Also, yesterday she was all about how sorry she was about leaving me out on Friday and then she only goes and does it again today.

Well anyway, I’ve decided to forget about it if she apologies tomorrow but I’m going to see if she does it herself without me telling her to. Oh, actually, I might give her until Wednesday coz she’d got a sponsored silence tomorrow. I don’t think she’ll keep it up!

I’ve got an assembly on Wednesday too which I’m dreading. I’ve got tomorrow lunch to practice and that’s all!


I don’t think he trusts me at all – 23rd October 1997

Thursday 23rd Yuk, pink! Hold on, I’ll just change the cartridge. Actually, it’s a waste. You’ll just have to put up with it! [Was I writing this at myself? I certainly didn’t ever want anyone else to read it!]

The basketball assessment was hard but the lowest mark was 14 out of 25 so it was over half. We’re doing volleyball next after the hols. I’ve never done it before. It could get interesting!

I had a Geography test this morning. It was all the stuff I hadn’t really looked at! I made a stupid mistake which I only realised after I’d handed it in. I’d put 15,000mm instead of 150mm or summit coz I’d read the bloody graph wrong!

Dougie seems to be ignoring me. He just doesn’t start up conversations with me like he did once. Poppy wasn’t in today so she probably won’t be in tomorrow which means I’ll have to sit on my bill next to Dougie. It’s embarrassing coz you’ve got no-one to talk to and it looks like you’ve got no mates! I’m dreading it.

I was walking behind Charlie W again on my way to the primary school after school. He kept turning round. I don’t think he trusts me at all. I’ll have to stop teasing him about Emma.

Urgh!!! This colour’s gone weird!


I could actually like him! – 7th October 1997

Tuesday 7th I caught Dougie glancing at me today. Twice! [Thank GOD! Yesterday I thought he was never going to look at me again!]

First time was when he was coming up the stairs this morning for form and he walked past and glanced sideways at me. The second time he was coming down the stairs a few minutes later and he was sighing, I think, and he turn right round and looked at me again.

Too many people like him at the moment! There’s

Zoe’s sis in Year 7
Lizzie says she likes him but hasn’t mentioned him for a while
Emma denies liking him but I don’t believe her!

[They were just the ones I knew about. I definitely had more competition than that. Pretty much all the girls in school fancied Dougie because he’d moved from Cumbria and was therefore all exotic.]

Hmmm….. What else has happened today??? Oh yeah, Mrs P collapsed or something in the middle of the quad. I’ve heard so many different sides of it but I saw the ambulance.

I went to Swing Band this afternoon after school coz Mr P wants me and Emma to join for the Paris trip.

Davis kept winking at Lizzie in English so I asked him why and he just said something about her looking at him between blowing his bloody trumpet down my ear!

Charlie W kept smiling at me too. I hate to admit this but… well… he sorta looks cute when he does and I could actually like him! [I KNEW IT!!! There’s been way too much in my diary about how much I didn’t like him for that to be true. The lady doth protest too much and all that.]

Urgh!!! What am I saying?! Anyway, he hardly ever smiles and when he does, I’d better just not look!

Dougie was in the Music block at lunch actually. He was in a practice room with a few other lads on the kit. They all went out so he said he’d come and stand with us instead of being on his bill.

Hey, I hope Dougie doesn’t like Emma! He’s so horrid to her. Maybe he does it for attention! I hope not!


What a babe! – 6th October 1997

Monday 6th At lunch today, Zoe went over and asked Charlie W if he’d go out with Emma. He didn’t say anything at first but then Danny Barnes (What a babe!) came over and asked me (ME!!!) which one it was. I pointed to Emma and asked him what Charlie said. He just told me no. I don’t think Charlie ever actually goes out with anyone, he just goes with [snogs] ‘em!

Dougie won’t look at me. Whenever I walk past him I always try to look discreetly at him to see if he’s looking at me. I don’t know if he really doesn’t notice me or if he’s doing what I do! I’m starting to think he doesn’t even like me now!


October 1997 - JDDB

[…and secretly CW]

He told me to feel his hand – 4th October 1997

Saturday 4th Emma and I went to Dougie’s village this afternoon. It took about 20 mins to get there and we were knackered. I wanted to call on Lizzie first but Emma wanted to go for Lucy so we did. [Lucy very conveniently lived next door to Dougie.]

I wanted to see Dougie but I also didn’t. D’you know what I mean?! We got past his house without seeing him and went for Lucy. Her sister answered the door and Lucy was eating her lunch so we went for Lizzie. She wasn’t in. She’d gone to her nan’s and swimming I think so we went back to Lucy’s again.

Lucy suggested calling on Dougie to see if he wanted to come so we sent her round. He didn’t. His middle sis had answered the door and said he was having a shower and doing homework.

We ended up taking our bikes to the park and just standing about. Somebody had drawn a picture in pen on one of the swings saying ‘Big Head JD’. We thought it could’ve been James Douglas (Dougie)!

I got bored and made them get off the swings and we cycled back to Lucy’s. We just stood [lurked] on the drive talking and Lucy went back round to Dougie’s. He said to give him a minute so we went inside for a drink.

Emma was just stuffing her face with cake when Dougie came to the front door. I went outside and stood on the drive with the others. There was a really awkward silence and nobody could decide what to do. In the end, we went through onto Dougie’s drive and played basketball. He’s not bad and I go a few in but Lucy and Emma gave up in the end coz they’re crap!

We just stood there shooting and started talking and we started taking the piss out of Charlie W and his party in the car park! It got really boring so Dougie and Lucy thought they would take us up this hill. We left our bikes and started walking. We took a short cut through these trees and I got hit in the eye with a branch. I was stood there with my eye watering and Dougie said, “You alright?” The other two just ignored me.

Anyway, we got through the nettles and brambles and got to the top. It was more open with not so many trees and we just sat on the grass eating Smints and Polos. Dougie then pulled a kite out of his pocket and told us that he knew there’d be nowt to do.

Emma went over to a bush and started picking berries and throwing them at us so Dougie chased her round and did it back. At one point, Lucy and Emma disappeared over the side of the hill and left me and Dougie. He commented on them being lesbians after I’d asked what the hell they were doing.

He went and touched some tree, trying to get off berries to throw at Emma and there was all this waxy stuff on it. He came over and showed me and he told me to feel his hand. I just laughed and said, “No, you’re alright!” and I couldn’t stand it any longer, I just had to get the other two to come back! [For God’s sake! I should’ve just touched his hand. Although, if touching his coat was the best thing since sliced bread, touching his ACTUAL HAND might’ve turned me into a jibbering wreck.]

General 1997 - Heart

Dougie asked them what they’d been doing and Lucy came out with, “We were just rolling round in the grass.” Dougie and I just burst out laughing and got told by Lucy we had sick minds!

We went back to Lucy’s again and said bye as Dougie went home. On the way back, Dougie had trodden in a dead magpie I’d turned over on the way up the hill and he had bits of it on his trainer but I didn’t tell him!

We ended up talking to Dougie again over the fence but not for long coz we had to go home. We told Lucy to come and meet us tomorrow and get Dougie to come too. I want them too, I think, but I don’t think they will.

On the way back, Emma told me that she’d gone over that hill deliberately so Dougie and I were alone. I don’t know what she thought we’d do!

Lucy and Dougie said they saw us leaving the cinema last night but couldn’t be bothered saying hi. Charming!

I can’t decide what Dougie thinks of me. I was pretty miserable today coz Man Utd were playing Crystal Palace and there was nowhere to get the score. If I see him tomorrow, I’ll try and be a bit livelier! I’m a bit worried about someone I know seeing us if we do meet up and then telling Mum or Dad.

Anyway, we probably won’t be going.


P.S. The score was 2-0 to Man U. Yey!

Go buy the video! – 3rd October 1997

Friday 3rd When I got to school this morning, Emma started begging me to go to a party with her. It’s one of Charlie W’s and he’d asked her through her friend Vanessa. I would probably go if it wasn’t going to be full of Year 11s and if Mum wouldn’t care. Plus, well, it’s Charlie Wilson, innit. Would you wanna go to a party of his? [I think I wanted to go.]

Davis asked Lena out in English yesterday. He asked her by writing it in the back of his book. She gave him her answer this afternoon which was basically NO.

I went to see The Full Monty with Lizzie, Freda and Emma this evening. It was brilliant! It was so funny I would take ages writing about it so if you wanna know, go buy the video!

Dougie and Ed were menna [‘Meant to’ for those of you that speak and write properly.] be going with Lucy and Poppy again but we didn’t see them.

Emma and I might ride into Dougie’s village on our bikes tomorrow.

The cat from next door, Sheba, was just run over outside a few minutes ago. We heard people outside and Abby saw 2 police bikes and a dead cat in the road. We though it could’ve been Cleo but it wasn’t so Mum went next door to tell them.