I have been planning to get Jake properly pissed – 31st March 2000

Friday 31st Sarah, Floyd and Jake came here tonight for a while. Floyd said we’ve got a nice house! We intended to go to Floyd’s later but his parents decided to stay in so we ended up at Emma’s. Gethin and Keira were there too.

For a while, Sarah and I have been planning to get Jake properly pissed because people keep telling me stories about him when he’s drunk and I’ve never seen him like that. Plus it’d give me a chance to ask questions that I wouldn’t normally ask. So, Sarah challenged him to a vodka drinking contest and he accepted it! It worked too!

We had to get out of Emma’s house in the end cos her parents were due back so we all headed for Floyd’s village. I was messing with Jake’s phone and came across Mr R’s (an Art teacher) number. There was also another staff number (from the Art trip) which he said was Miss T’s (a Tech teacher) who he reckons is fit. (She’s short and round!)

I was a bit drunk too so I started winding him up by accusing him of having an affair with Mr R and saying I’d have to dump him. He was going all soppy and telling me not to. It took us ages to get down Crofters Lane cos I told him to go and stand in a field while I spoke to Hugo Pratt (he phoned) and he did so I had to go and get him. Then he stopped and kept kissing me so I couldn’t speak to Hugo so we hung up and snogged for ages.

As we were going past the school, Sarah got upset. It was just cos she was drunk and she started worrying that she was getting like her grandad (an alcoholic) and saying she was a hypocrite for moaning when other people got drunk. To cheer her up, we went to the chippy. I didn’t get anything. It was freezing cold outside so Jake and I just stood there and cuddled (and snogged)!

Everyone else went home after food but we didn’t want to just yet so we stood outside The Plough. I didn’t want to go in cos one of the barmaids knows me so I was being stubborn and stood outside. He headed inside but changed his mind and came back to me and put his cold hands on my back to try and make me go in. I did eventually.

We sat and talked for ages, mostly about Canada. He said he doesn’t want to go as much as he did when he booked it because of me and he said he’ll write every day. I asked him what if he finds the love of his life out there cos he could get away with anything. He assured me that he wouldn’t dream of going with [snogging] anyone else. Hmmm! He told me his 2 loves are me and skiing but I’m rated highest! 🙂

The barmaid made us leave eventually so we phoned a taxi and went and sat on a bench by the library. He told me I was pretty more than once and said I was sweet when I told him I really do like him and he also kept telling me I’m funny. I think it’s in a way that I don’t mean to be, he just finds some of the daft little things I say amusing!

As we were sat there, we saw Lara Beale. He called her a slag for some reason! I found out he went out with her for about 2 months and that she was his first girlfriend. Then he mentioned her being a nymphomaniac so I asked how he knew and if Hugo had really been lying. He assured me that Hugo was lying and that she used to just jump all over him all the time and stuff but that he never slept with her. I asked why not and he said that he would’ve done if she’d had her way but that he just hadn’t been ready.

Then I forced myself to ask the question that I’ve been dying to know the answer to for ages which was if he had ever slept with anyone. I got the answer I wanted which was no. I asked why not again and he told me he’d just not been ready and that he just hadn’t found the right person before. Good!

He phoned for a taxi eventually but it took ages so I said I might as well just walk home. I wasn’t being serious but he put his foot down and said he wouldn’t let me do that cos it’s dangerous! I then saw Matt Brand that lives a few doors down and said I should get in his taxi. Jake pointed out that there was no room so I said I’d just I’d have to sit on Matt’s knee! He said I could sit on his knee in our taxi and that I wasn’t getting in Matt’s cos he gets really easily jealous. Good!

When I got home, we sent each other messages for a while. There were some good ones from him. He commented on the bench that sometimes I seemed dead casual about us so I sent him one apologising. His reply was, “WHAT DO YOU MEAN? I KNOW YOU CARE ABOUT STUFF! I’M STILL SHIVERING – SHAME YOU’RE NOT HERE TO KEEP ME WARM!!! LOVE YOU MORE THAN ANYTHING IN THE WORLD – EVEN SKIING! xxx”.

I sent one back saying I wished I was there too and asked if he meant it about “even skiing” cos I’m not so sure! His reply was, “OK SLIGHT EXAGGERATION BUT YOU IN A SKI RESORT REALLY WOULD DO IT FOR ME! I WANT TO BE WITH YOU ALL THE TIME!! LOVE YOU FOREVER JAKE xxxxx : )”.

I asked him what exactly it would do for him and he said, “IT TURNS ME ON OF COURSE!! I’M SORRY, I’M GOING TO MISS U LOADS TOO : ( I FEEL SAD JUST THINKING ABOUT IT! NIGHT NIGHT! LOVE YOU LOTS N LOTS! J xxxxxxxxxxxxxx”. I’m not sure what he said sorry for.

He’s soooo nice!! I think he’s better when he’s pissed! Mind you, he still didn’t try anything.

Bye!

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I was smiling so much I couldn’t eat my Shredded Wheat!! – 25th March 2000

Saturday 25th Went to Warrington with Mum in search of boxing gloves and jeans but we were unsuccessful.

Hayley came round tonight because she wanted my help composing a message to Andy. She didn’t in the end cos I did one from my phone asking why he’d lied and stuff. She might do it later.

I send Jake a message earlier telling him I was considering doing my hair Mel C style [as in the video below] only green at the hairdressers tomorrow!

I got one back saying, “YOU WHAT!! DON’T HAVE ANYTHING TOO DRASTIC DONE – I LIKE YOUR HAIR! AND AS FOR GREEN, WELL YOU’VE GOT SLIGHTLY MORE GUTS THAN ME!! I STILL LOVE YOU WHATEVER! J xxx”. I loved the ending of that one!

Later, I sent him an unfinished message by accident so I sent another explaining why it didn’t make sense and that I couldn’t remember what I was going to say but it was probably how much I love him. I got one off him then saying, “YOU MAKE ME SO HAPPY : ) IS HAYLEY STILL THERE? HAS SHE SORTED THE ANDY THING OUT?? NIGHT NIGHT! LOTS OF LOVE JAKE xxxxx”. This time it was the beginning of the message I liked. I was smiling so much I couldn’t eat my Shredded Wheat!!

It’s nice to see he’s concerned about my mates too. He’s sooooo lovely!!! The whole Andy thing’s made me realise how lucky I’ve been with Jake so far. I still can’t believe he actually likes me!!

Bye!

 

Am I ever going to get another snog off him??! – 9th & 10th March 2000

Thursday 9th I still can’t believe I’m going out with Jake Taylor!!! I like him soooo much now! I saw quite a bit of him today at lunch and stuff and he stopped for a while after college because we were shifting the careers stuff out of our common room. He went before me because he had to go to the dentist but I got a snog. They get better! I tried to stop it because I thought someone was coming in the room but he didn’t let me by leaning in as I tried to pull away. That was really nice for some reason. I suppose it’s because he wanted to carry on even if someone else had come in!

He smells really nice too. Sarah agrees! We were walking up the stairs in college today and we both got a whiff of what he wears and looked at each other. We didn’t even have to say anything, it was weird how we both just knew the other one was thinking, “I can smell Jake”! It’s Issy Myaki Miyake (I don’t know how you spell it) he told me. I’ve heard of that before because my sister always used to go on about how much she loved the smell. He says it’s his dad’s.

I got another message ending, “LOVE YOU xxxxx ; )” tonight. It made my stomach do that nice warm thing when I read it!

For future reference, Hugo Pratt’s home phone number is 01565 ******. Jake told me in the message because I’d asked what it was as an excuse so he’d send me a message back.

Bye!

Friday 10th I’ve now developed aching eyes and a bad headache. Brilliant – this cold just gets better and better – NOT!!!

Went to see this Battle of the Bands thing at school tonight with Jake. It was pretty crap and I didn’t get any physical contact whatsoever off Jake all the way through. We went to The Coach afterwards and he held my hand, put his hand on my leg and stomach and leaned on me at various points in the evening but that’s as far as it went. Therefore I am extremely pissed off! All I got was a quick peck on the lips goodbye when I got out of the car because he was giving some lad a lift home. Grrr!! I won’t see him all weekend and nothing ever happens in college because there’s always loads of people about.

Am I ever going to get another snog off him??!

Bye!

Just cos! – 4th March 2000

Saturday 4th I had a phone call from Emma this afternoon asking if I knew where Jake and Niall went because she’d said they could stay at her house last night but her mum’d kicked up a fuss and wouldn’t let them. She said her mum had liked Jake and has said he was gorgeous and had spoken to her very nicely!

I sent him a message asking where he went and I got a reply stretching over 3 messages. He said, “EMMA IS MAD! SHE GOT ME TO DROP THEM OFF + THEN LOCKED THE GATE SO I COULDN’T DRIVE HOME – THEN HAD AN ARGUMENT WITH HER MUM + TOLD US TO SLEEP IN THE CARAVAN!”

Then, “THEN HER MUM CAME OUT + TOLD US TO GO – SHE TOLD HER MUM I WAS DRINK DRIVING! I DROPPED KEIRA OFF – ME + NIALL TRIED TO FIND FREDA’S + GOT FOLLOWED BY A LOAD OF COPS…”

And, “THEN WE WENT HOME COS WE COULDN’T FIND HER HOUSE BUT I HAD PHONED MY MUM + SAID I WAS STAYING AT EMMA’S SO SHE HAD A SHOCK THIS MORNING!”

I went to LA Bowl tonight. I’ve not been for a while so I thought I might not get quite as bored. I was wrong! Even with Jake there it was boring. We just spent hours stood about waiting for a lane and, even after we’d got one and finished the game, we were stood about again waiting for a lift home. I wouldn’t go on the dodgems because I didn’t fancy being battered about when I’d got a headache and stuff already so I think Jake must have thought I’m a bit boring too.

As we were waiting to leave the place, I asked Sarah why she liked Gethin. She didn’t say anything except, “Just cos!” then she asked, “Well why do you like him?” pointing at Jake so I replied, “Just cos!” just to be awkward cos she didn’t answer me either.

I only got one kiss off him which was outside as we were going but it didn’t last long because some cocky little bloke walked past saying, “Is that even legal?!” and then all my mates were in cars waiting for me so I was a bit disappointed that I didn’t get a good snog.

As I neared home, I realised that when I’d answered “Just cos!” to Sarah’s question, it must have sounded awful to Jake so at about 12:30 am (when I just got in), I texted him saying, “SOMEONE’S JUST POINTED OUT THAT IT SOUNDED REALLY AWFUL WHEN SARAH ASKED ME WHY I LIKED U + I SAID JUST COS. I’M SORRY OF IT DID!! LOVE YOU xxx”. I didn’t get a reply but it’s late now.

Bye!

His kissing’s definitely improved! – 3rd March 2000

Friday 3rd Cat was talking to Jenny in their Art lesson again today. She told Cat that all the time in Paris, Jake was whinging that I wasn’t there and Cat told her that I’d been doing the same and saying “Jake!” longingly every few minutes. Jenny said he kept saying, “Tessa!” in the same way! Aled told Cat again that Jake’d been sat clutching his phone every night and worrying when I didn’t phone or something.

I completely dropped myself in it with Hayley today. I was sat talking to Floyd and Jake, and Floyd said that in biology they’d mentioned limbs and Hayley’d linked this to Lymm and then, of course, Andy. I then said, “Yeah she does that with everything. Like every time a blue car drives past she starts calling his name.” I said all that not realising she was stood in the doorway listening! She then stormed in and yelled, “Some friend you are!” and then went out again.

Cat and Sarah were hoping it’d make Hayley realise we’re all sick of hearing about Andy but I doubt it will! I tried to apologise and explain we were just saying how obvious it was she really liked Andy but she just kept sending messages back saying that she thought I was a friend but obviously I’m not and other bollocks like that.

I went out tonight with Jake, Niall Cafferty, Emma, Maisie, Gethin, Keira, Big Paul and a few others in The Mossland pub. It was really boring and I was worried that my dad was going to come in so eventually we went to The Coach and Horses. Hayley was there with Georgia Dean and she seemed to have forgiven me.

The subject of Canada came up again. Jake told me he’s only going for 12 weeks now and asked me when my birthday is. I told him and he said he’ll go after that instead of October, as long as he’s gone before New Year. Great!!

We went in The Plough later on. We had a snog in the car park which I needed! When we went in, most people we were with got chucked out because they were IDing people. I managed to avoid the woman who was doing it so I got to stay. Hayley and Georgia sneaked back in with Hayley’s brother later.

I snogged Jake while Hayley’s brother was around which was probably a mistake because he’ll discuss it with his mum who’ll probably discuss it with mine. AARRRGGH!!!

Jake gave me a lift home after dropping Samantha Beck off. I got a goodbye kiss and turned round as he was driving off to see him smiling to himself. His kissing’s definitely improved!

Bye!

Zoe says she’s getting married!!! – 29th February 2000

Tuesday 29th I remembered today that Jake had admitted to being a Manchester City fan on Sunday night. Oh well, at least he’s not following the Scouse lot or anything!

Cat was talking to Jake’s mate Jenny in their Art lesson today. She told Cat that, in Paris, Jake was sat clutching his phone all evening saying stuff like, “Tess usually rings at this time. Why isn’t she ringing me?” or something. That’s good to hear because I wasn’t sure that he’d have wanted me to keep phoning him.

Jake also told me on Sunday that in Paris, Sadie Harding had tried it on with him and snogged Aled. She’s got a boyfriend too – slag!! Anyway, I got Abby to question her today on it all. I believe Jake that nothing happened but I wanted to see what she had to say about it because, before I went to Pre Loup, I’d jokingly told her to keep an eye on him for me.

After school, I asked Abby what Sadie had said and she told me that she had snogged Aled (I didn’t care about that part) and that her boyfriend doesn’t know (for future reference, her boyfriend’s Kingsley Stevens!) and that she’d slept with Jake in his bed. So, Abby then of course walked off, leaving me worrying all through Swing Band!

I found her again afterwards and asked for details and she told me that Sadie had just slept in the same bed as him and some people thought they were cuddling up but weren’t. I was relieved to hear that!

I sent Jake a message though, just to check his reaction. I said, “HELLO! WHAT’S THIS I HEAR ABOUT U SLEEPING WITH SADIE HARDING??! SARAH’S NOW DECIDED THAT SHE DOESN’T REGRET DUMPING HUGO + CAT GOT ALEX’S NUMBER! LOVE TESS x”. I got a message back from him explaining that Aled and someone called Kelly had also been in the same bed because his was broken and that nothing happened.

I sent one back just to let him know I knew saying, “I KNOW, U DIDN’T HAVE 2 EXPLAIN! WHAT U UP 2? I’M HAVING SO MUCH FUN DOING MY GRASS ESSAY FOR BIO!! (YAWN!) SEE U ON THURS : ( LOTS OF LOVE TESS xxxxx”. (He’s not in tomorrow because he’s going to Plymouth for something.)

I got a reply saying, “DON’T DO THAT TO ME AGAIN! I NEARLY HAD A HEART ATTACK – I THOUGHT SOMEONE HAD MADE UP SOME RUMOUR ABOUT IT + U WERE UPSET ABOUT IT!! LOVE U LOADS J : ) xxxXxxx”.

I sent him an apology for scaring him and asked what he’s doing this weekend. He signed of his next message, “LOTS OF HUGS N KISSES LOVE J : ) xxx” and I finished the one after that (about not fancying going to Manchester with Freda and co.) quite simply, “LOVE U xxx”. It’s the end of his messages that I like best!

Zoe says she’s getting married!!! She also says she wants me, Rochelle, Bridget and her sisters to be bridesmaids! I’m in shock! We’re not allowed to say anything yet cos her mum doesn’t know. She’ll go mad!! She’s only seen this guy once and met him on the internet. It’s got to be dodgy!

Bye!

P.S. I got a really nice snog off Jake before last lesson. I can’t write down how much I like him! It’s quite scary actually!

I never thought of lads using lip balm but Jake does. He left his and his wallet at Brian’s on Sunday.

At lunch, I was just beginning to think we were just going to sit there with no physical contact but then he kept shifting his chair closer to me and eventually put his hand on my leg. Every time I let go of his hand, he put it back on my leg and it always made my stomach do that weird (but nice) sinking thing!

A passionate reunion!! – 28th February 2000

Monday 28th I went round to Brian Hobbs’s house last night because a few of my mates were having a get-together. Jake got the night off work so he could come with me. I got a text saying, “I’VE JUST LEGGED IT TO THE PUB TO BEG THE LANDLORD TO GIVE ME THE NIGHT OFF. LOVE JAKE xxx”. I’m glad he did because it was quite a good night.

My mum asked who was going and when I mentioned Jake she asked if he was the one who gave me the rose. When I said he was, she asked if I was going out with him. I sort of shrugged and squirmed a bit and she said, “Is it just early days yet?” It was so cringing!!

We got to Brian’s and just drank and chatted. Hugo phoned me and started going on about Jake and some girl called Claire who he’d been rolling round on the floor with at some party a while ago when he’d been really drunk. Apparently it looked like they were doing more than kissing but weren’t. She’s meant to be ugly and he was very, very drunk.

Hayley phoned Hugo later and started yelling down then phone at him about stuff. He then fell out with Jake who says he doesn’t care. He had ‘a word’ with Hugo which Hayley overheard. He was telling Hugo that he’d better stop telling me stuff about other girls. Maybe he’s got some dark secrets or something! I’m worried again now!

We started talking about Canada and he said I have to go and visit him. I pointed out that 5 months was a long time and he said that he might only be out there for 3 now. Good!

As it got later, the lights went out and I ended up in Brian’s bed with Jake. There was everyone else in the room too though! We just snogged all night. My lips are really sore this morning because he was on top of me and couldn’t hold himself up properly. He wasn’t as gentle as usual but I didn’t really care! It was just a passionate reunion!!

I somehow got onto the subject of becoming a prostitute when I go to Holland but then Jake told me I was too pretty. 🙂 He also told me I had a nice complexion and nice hair. Hope my skin stays nice now I’m off the tablets.

We couldn’t do much other than kiss when the others were in the room, although I’m not sure we would’ve done even if we’d have been alone. He’s a bit shy but I suppose it’s better than being pushy. He did end up with his hand in my bra and he had his shirt off though. Gethin was going round with a camera so I hope he didn’t get any really dodgy ones! [Almost…]

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Either all the passion or my really bad ski tan appears to have shocked The Simpsons.

Jake kept hugging me really tightly as well. That was dead nice.

We left at about 2:15 am in a taxi. We were pretty silent but it wasn’t awkward. He just held my hand tighter and tighter as I got closer to home.

I don’t think I’ve ever liked anyone this much before.

Bye!

P.S. Something’s been bugging me all day because I don’t know if it actually happened last night or if it was a really vivid dream. I moved my hand from underneath me and brushed over the flies on his trousers. He then jerked away from kissing me and sat up and said something a bit dodgy (but not bad). The more I think about it, the more I think it must’ve been a dream because surely he wouldn’t have announced it in a room full of people, whether they were asleep or not! It’s really annoying me because I really don’t know if it happened or not!