Just giving him certain looks may cause trouble – 26th May 2002

Sunday 26th  On Monday, I had a night out to Camel Club. Jonas was there too with his mates and a load of curly Scouser wigs. Paul, Dave and Mitch were all being really nice to me and Paul even hugged me at one point. Geeky Sid however didn’t really speak to me so I didn’t bother trying to make an effort cos when he’s pissed he always turns EVERYTHING I say into something bad and he sulks.

Jonas was pretty drunk too and had a stern word with me about being nice to Sid before I’d even seen him. Apparently I don’t always have to say anything, just giving him certain looks may cause trouble. Great. I’d better get a mask or something. Jonas was pissed so I didn’t take him being all serious too seriously and he did say later he didn’t mean it to sound like he was having a go at me. Before we left we spent ages searching for Jonas’s wig cos some girl nicked it off him and wouldn’t have it back til he bought her a drink. He didn’t. 🙂

Jonas stayed at mine afterwards and we had our most serious disagreement yet but it was nothing really, it’s just we haven’t really had one before. We were just lying in bed and he was basically not seeing how me not talking to Sid is the best thing to do. If I speak to him it’s even worse. Jonas said I should at least try and I pointed out that I had but it didn’t work. Jonas ended up getting a bit upset cos he said he didn’t want there to be tension between his mate and his girlfriend. I felt guilty then (even though it’s not my fault) so we made up.

Archie, Dave, Jonas and I all had a trip to the cinema on Tuesday night to see Dog Soldiers and Star Wars. They were both very good but Dog Soldiers was better. I did miss some of it though due to hiding behind my knees!

Archie and I were bored on Wednesday night so we went and joined Ben and his mates in Milton. It was quite good actually, considering I don’t know many of them very well. Ben told me that I’m “well happy now” and that he likes it. He used to say I was a bit miserable but I explained that it was probably Kevin’s fault! They all convinced Archie and I to go to Warehouse with them but I went to find Jonas who was working in the computer rooms til about midnight.

Thursday was quite a good night for Archie, Hazel and her new boyfriend Mike and I. We all went out. We started in Wetherspoons where some of Mike’s flatmates were. I got told that a lad called Kav (who I actually thought was quite nice when I’ve seen him around halls) fancied me. They were being evil and not telling him I had a boyfriend even though I told them they should. I wasn’t interested any more now I’ve got loverly Jonas. 🙂 Mmm!

Anyway, there was also a girl called Emma with them and she said she fancied Archie. Once we got into Bar Non, everyone was forcing them together and it actually worked. They ended up snogging loads in front of everyone. That left me as a bit of a gooseberry. I had one last wander round and saw Dave who seemed pleased to see me (I think he was pissed!) and Jake who told me Connor’s invited him to Abby’s 18th party. I then got picked up by Jonas which I was glad about.

Archie went out with Emma the next night to the cinema. The same night, a load of uni publicity people came to our flat with the Skool Disko flyers. I’m famous!

This weekend I’ve been with Jonas nearly all of the time, watching the F1 together and stuff. We’ve been together for exactly 6 MONTHS today. How good is that?! 🙂

Bye!

I really, really didn’t want to dump him – 5th May 2002

Sunday 5th  Since I last wrote in here, quite a bit has happened. On 25th April, my flatmate Layla went out for her birthday. She had a large gathering at the flat first before we all made our way into town. I hung round with Violet, Ronan, Vi’s mate Jo and his coursemate Max cos we didn’t really know many of Layla’s friends and some were pretty slapperish and annoying.

Jonas was supposed to meet me at some point but the first time I phoned him he was still in Sharkey’s with his mate Mitch so I went on ahead to Bar Non. At about midnight, I got a voicemail message from Jonas saying a drunken, “I love you!” and stuff with Mitch in the background but when I tried to ring him back, I kept getting his answer service. I kept trying but couldn’t get hold of him so I went back to Storthes without him.

I was a bit worried when I got back about where he’d got to but I eventually managed to get through and he just said, “Hello?” in a really dozy way before it cut off. I thought I’d woken him up at first but then I got another 2 voicemails saying, “I won’t to be able to stay with you, sorry.” I could tell he was crying so I was very, very worried and upset.

The only thing I could think of as to why he hadn’t met me or answered his phone and sounded upset was that he’d snogged someone else cos he was drunk. I couldn’t really believe he’d do that but then I couldn’t think of another explanation. Him being hurt didn’t cross my mind but then I thought he would’ve told me. However, I was wrong.

After sitting on my floor in tears, throwing my phone about in frustration and even trying to ring his housemate Russell, Jonas eventually sent me a text saying, “I’M IN HOSPITAL GETTING MY HEAD CHECKED” and that was it. My immediate reaction was relief cos he hadn’t cheated on me, then guilt for even considering that he had and then panic again cos I didn’t know what had happened to him. Before the text, I’d be worrying about what to do if he told me he’d snogged a girl. I really, really didn’t want to dump him but I thought I’d have to and that really upset me cos I didn’t want to be without him.

I eventually got a phone call from Jonas saying he’d been beaten up. He sounded very upset so that made me cry even more. He said he’d see me tomorrow and explain but I really couldn’t sleep for tears and worrying.

The next day after much more worrying, I got to see Jonas when he came round. He was all cut and bruised and very tired and a bit confused. He told me it was 5 lads that did it. He’d been in Warehouse and dancing a lot and apparently girls were watching him so some bloke shoved him and he shoved back. They got chucked out but the bouncers gave Mitch and Jonas a head start. The lad and his mates managed to catch up with them by the new Kingsgate Centre and Jonas pinned one down and said he didn’t want a fight.

The lad was obviously embarrassed by being overpowered by someone wearing a “I’m not a bitch, I’m THE Bitch and that’s Miss Bitch to you” t-shirt so he fought anyway. Jonas ended up being kicked in the head for about 5 minutes but luckily it was all on security camera and the police turned up and arrested 3 of the lads. I’m sooo glad he’s alright cos even the police said it looked really nasty. He was lucky. Mind you, even with head injuries we got to level 5!

That weekend I was with Jonas all the time. We watched the F1 together and went to the Arb with Archie and his brother. We also got to level 5 twice in the same night.

The next time I went to Bar Non was a better night than the previous time. It didn’t take much though! Archie was trying to pull a girl called Natalie but was let down and was upset about it. I got dragged round by Hazel all night trying to find some lad called Simon. We eventually did and he lives with Bronwen’s brother at Primrose Hill. Bronwen’s bro (Tom, I think) tried to get me to go back to his house but, obviously, I refused. I had a few lads pinching my arse too. I wanted Jonas there.

I was going to go to a Mansun gig with Jonas in Manchester but I couldn’t in the end cos Pierced Sam was taking his girlfriend instead. Jonas brought be back a t-shirt though which was sweet. 🙂

I had a worry about me and Jonas again while I was watching Teachers because someone said if you have to ask if it’s ok, it might not be. However, I then realised I was just being stupid and insecure because I do love him and I don’t want to be without him. I’ve been through reasons about Easter and I think my brain might just be preparing me for the worst, just in case something happens e.g. an “Emma” and he goes off me. I’ve got to trust he won’t though cos I know he loves me and he’s not Jake, thankfully, cos everything went wrong with him. I prefer Jonas too!

I went to Gainsborough with Jonas today so he could clear his dad’s garage out. I actually enjoyed it quite a lot. We talked about my year work experience and Jonas said he’ll come with me for it if it’s far away 🙂 but he said it’d be awful not living together when we got back. True. I hope we’re still together then, I really do.

Bye!

He’s only 80% sure I love him – 23rd April 2002 – Part 3

Tuesday 23rd continued  I came back to Huddersfield the evening of my test after stopping and seeing Auntie G and Grandma on the way back. Grandma’s back at home again now with more home help.

I phoned Jonas when my dad left my halls and he came round pretty soon after. It was pretty weird seeing him at first. We just had lots of hugs and little kisses. It was nice though. Jonas said he had to keep pinching himself and said he missed me and loves me. It was sooo good seeing him again. Mmm! 🙂

That weekend I went with Jonas back to Gainsborough because his dad’s moving house and Jonas had to check the house was okay while his dad’s in the Falklands. The house is very nice. We went to Lincoln with his sister and drove around a lot taking keys to various people.

Everyone was very nice to me again. Jonas’s mum let us have her bed which I thought was very kind and trusting! We did get up to level 5 in it but stopped before anything happened. Jonas said he just wanted to lie there naked with me. It’s the first time we’ve shared a proper, comfy double bed!

When I got back to Huddersfield, I got to my 2nd lecture to be told I failed my Statistics tests by 2 marks. Grr!! I’ve got to resit it and the most I can get is 40%. I also saw Jonas for the 1st time in Huddersfield when he hasn’t been with me. We were in the Kingsgate Centre with our mates.

That Monday night, I had quite a good night in Camel. Jonas was very pissed and was putting on Jen’s eyeliner and lip gloss. Bronwen said Jonas is a “wicked dancer” as he moshed about on his own on the dancefloor. I briefly saw Jake who pecked me on the cheek and congratulated me on passing my driving test and saw loads of other people I knew.

I left early with Jonas and he came back to mine. For some reason he said he’s only 80% sure I love him as much as he loves me cos of Jake and Archie. I don’t know why cos I do! It’s scared me cos I don’t want him to think that. Jonas also said he’d marry me if he could but he doesn’t want to scare me. I’m not scared 🙂 I like that idea (but obviously not now)! He said he wants to be with me forever. 🙂 Mmm!

The next day, Jonas said he only said the 80% thing cos he was pissed but he does want to marry me and have babies with me (EEK! to the 2nd bit! It looks horrible!). He said he always wondered why people get engaged at uni and now he knows. It’ll be more special than it is already if he ends up being my longest lasting boyfriend. I hope he is!

Since then I’ve been quite busy. I’ve been out quite a few times and had houses to sort out etc. I’ve been to the cinema to see Bend It Like Beckham and Oceans 11 which were both very good.

I also went out to Bar Non which was an okay night. I was pretty drunk!

I might’ve given him food poisoning – 22nd to 24th March 2002

Friday 22nd  I was at Jonas’s today. We were in bed for quite a while We got to level 5 but he ignored me so I was in a bit of a mood for a while. I snapped out of it cos it’s not really his fault and I felt mean.

We had a walk round Greenhead Park for a while which was nice and watched people on the skate park.

Bye!

Saturday 23rd  Jonas came back to mine today. We got bored though because most people have gone home so we decided to go for a walk in the woods with a picnic. It’s really nice there and there’s a river which we followed. It was fun climbing trees and hills and stuff and trying to spot magpies cos Jonas reckons he’s never seen one in Britain. When we got back to Storthes we lay in a field for a bit, completely knackered after climbing a hill. It was nice.

Tonight, Jonas felt really ill. I think I might’ve given him food poisoning with lasagne. He felt sick and stuff but said it helped when I rubbed his tummy. He was worrying me though cos he was breathing funny and stopped breathing altogether sometimes.

He’s taken some photos of me off my wall and my Miffy bag to take home with him. He said it’s weird how we met and have stuff like music etc. in common.

Bye!

Sunday 24th  I don’t want to not see Jonas for 3 weeks. I wasn’t sure how much I’d miss him last night but I will miss him sooo much. I love Jonas! We kept telling each other we love each other and hugging and saying we’ll miss us. I got in his car before he went and he said he’ll write a song for me (cool!) and told me he never used to be as happy as he is now because of me! 🙂 MmmJonas!! When he left I got a kiss through the window and I ran down to the road so I could wave goodbye.

Dad picked me up this afternoon and we stopped off at the Meadowview home Grandma’s been put in after wandering and getting found by a man who called the police when she couldn’t find her house. It’s not very nice in there, Mum says, and Grandma’s confused.

Bye!

Ghosts and weird people – 19th & 20th March 2002

Tuesday 19th  Everybody went out tonight. Oh, except me. I decided too late that I wanted to join them but everyone had already gone and Jonas was with me. I felt left out but I like being with Jonas. He had no money left so he couldn’t come out either. Instead we went for a drive.

Jonas kept asking if I was missing out because of him but, even if I was, that’s my choice. I’d rather be with him but then I still don’t like missing stuff. I can’t have it both ways though (until he gets some money maybe!). I don’t want to be knackered on the fieldtrip tomorrow either.

We drove past Visage to see if we could see any of my mates (we didn’t) and then went up to Castle Hill. It was dark and I was a bit scared of ghosts and weird people but we got out of the car and walked up to the tower. I’m sure I saw the door open! We stood at the top of the hill for a bit cos you can see nearly all of Huddersfield, trying to pick out places we knew like the uni buildings. It was quite nice cos Jonas was stood behind me hugging me, until I got scared again and ran back to the car. Jonas said he enjoyed it.

When we got back, we watched TV for a bit then went to bed. We got to level 5 but had to stop cos it was hurting me a bit for some reason.

Bye!

Wednesday 20th  We had a Water Science fieldtrip to a pond today, kick-sampling again. The lecturer guy stopped me at one point and told me to hold out my hand. I wasn’t all that keen until I saw a leg sticking out of his hand. It was a toad. I bet he expected me to scream and run away!

Kevin was annoying me a bit. He kept going on about catching fish (seriously) and going in the muddy bit even though we’d been told not to cos we’d sink.

Jonas came round this evening. I spoke to my mum and sister too. Abby’s got her driving test just before mine but won’t tell me when.

Bye!

We quite fancy the idea of a barbed wire toilet seat – 14th to 18th March 2002

Thursday 14th  Jen, Archie and I went to Bar Non tonight. We were discussing stuff about the house we might be living in next year and how we’re going to decorate it. We quite fancy the idea of a barbed wire toilet seat!

Archie kept being all flirty with me and pinching my arse. He said mine’s nicer than Bronwen’s too and I know how much he fancies her. I felt a bit guilty, like I was doing stuff behind Jonas’s back, even though I wasn’t.

I saw Layla’s mate Claire out as well as Storecard. They both spoke to me briefly.

I was pretty pissed and so were the other two. Jonas picked up all up and we nicked a couple of road signs:

Jonas and I went up to my flat first and he said I was cute when I was pouting for a kiss and flapping my arms about. I think I lay on the kitchen floor too which is not recommended due to lumps of chicken korma and stuff being on it too. We got some of my things and went to his house.

Bye!

Friday 15th  We stayed at Jonas’s most of the day but I managed to get a bit of my Microbiology coursework done.

Bye!

Saturday 16th  Jonas got up very early (for the first time since I’ve known him!) to watch the F1. I didn’t. We stayed in (apart from a trip to the uni library) and played Worms on the Playstation a lot.

Jonas said it won’t be right not seeing me for 3 weeks over Easter and sleeping on his own. He’s right.

Bye!

Sunday 17th Jonas got up very early AGAIN to watch the F1. He came with me back to Storthes later on. We saw Jake there with his girl flatmates and when I thought I’d lost my keys, Jonas was driving right up behind them through the car park when they were in the car in front of us. My keys were actually in a plaster box in my bag.

Jonas was all cuddly tonight. We did stuff.

Bye!

Monday 18th  I had a very evil maths (statistics) test today. I couldn’t do much of it at all. The last question was worth 20 marks and I ran out of time before I started it. I know I’ve failed that one.

Jonas stayed at mine again. 🙂

Bye!

Diseased little nether regions – 8th March 2002

Friday 8th  I got really upset this morning when Jonas told me that Sid called me ‘Testicles’ to him and all his mates. I was upset out of anger more than anything else cos I really thought people would’ve grown out of taking the piss out of my name by now. It just reminded me so much of the sad, immature people at school who used to say it and if Sid had been there this morning I would’ve kicked him right in his diseased little nether regions. Fucker!

Actually, I think Sid was calling me that outside Bar Non last night. Yeah, he was, I remember now. Bastard! He was yelling “Testicles” at me to try and get my attention but I chose to ignore him until he called me by my name. If I remember rightly, Jonas (who was stood with him) didn’t say much to stop him. I didn’t run off in a huff like Sid would’ve done.

Ooh, I’m sooo pissed off with him! I would’ve been so embarrassed if I’d been sober (I was a bit anyway) cos there were loads of people about. I hope nobody I know heard him and says it too. Mind you, I bet he looked like a bit of a prick standing there yelling “Testicles!” for no apparent reason!!

The other thing Knobhead Geeky Sid said is that he hates Northerners because we’re “rude”. Erm… and taking the piss out of someone’s name and sulking at every possible opportunity isn’t? I think it is.

Jonas heard me crying in the shower this morning (although I’m not sure how!) and came in. He then started being nice to me which made me happy so I couldn’t stop crying!

Bye!

Running around outside like maniacs – 4th to 6th March 2002

Monday 4th  When I woke Jonas up this morning he went all mad and weird but it was funny. It was quite early so I think he was still dreaming!

Bye!

Tuesday 5th  Jonas stayed at mine again tonight. We’ve taken to sleeping on the floor on my camp bed mattress that my sister left cos there’s more room.

Even though I’ve come on my period, Jonas said he didn’t care about doing stuff to me anyway. I wasn’t all that keen though.

Jen went to Visage tonight with Archie and Alexa (Jen’s flatmate) and people. I’m not please cos she didn’t mention it to me really. I probably wouldn’t have gone anyway cos my cold’s still making me feel a bit ill. Someone could still have invited me though.

Bye!

Wednesday 6th  Jonas stayed at mine again tonight and I’m very glad he did cos the whole of Storthes Hall had a power cut and I would’ve been scared on my own. We think it was the wind that caused it cos it was very strong.

I kept hearing screams from the direction of the kitchen so Jonas and I went to see who was there. All my flatmates except Marc (who was at the cinema) were huddled round the kitchen table.

Lewis had put cling film over the kitchen door because he was convinced the mentally ill people from before it was a student village were going to come and haunt us. Violet lit a candle and we all stayed in the kitchen watching loads of people running around outside like maniacs with torches.

I haven’t had the best of days really. After the power came back on, we had not hot water, no phones working and then no water at all. I also spent 4 hours this afternoon doing Water Science maths calculations which made my brain hurt.

Bye!

It would’ve looked very dodgy! – 1st to 3rd March 2002

Friday 1st  Jonas and I stayed in bed for ages this morning and cuddled lots. We then set up a bed on the floor by the telly out of sofa cushions so we could watch the F1 in the early hours of the morning. I’m not really into it but Jonas is kind of obsessed and wanted me to stay up and watch it with him. I don’t mind really.

We got through levels and then we both got a bit paranoid and needed each other’s reassurance which worked. Jonas was saying he’s useless (he’s not!) and I was worrying he’s going to think I’m boring like his ex Natasha was if I don’t do everything he wants to try. We were okay after chatting about it though.

Bye!

Saturday 2nd  Jonas and I stayed in bed for quite a lot of the day but then shifted ourselves and went into town to have a look in the new Kingsgate shopping centre that’s just opened opposite uni. We weren’t all that impressed by it cos a lot of the shops weren’t even open and the ones that were are either sports shops or health food places. Hopefully it’ll improve.

We then went back to Jonas’s and ended up staying awake until about 5am to watch the F1 stuff. I got a bit bored by it and I think we both fell asleep before the end. Jonas got all excited when the commentator (I can’t remember what he’s called but he has a look of Satan/the Count off Sesame Street!) said it’s the true fans that stay up so late.

For some reason Jonas also said he wanted to “make love rampantly”. Maybe he was trying to keep me awake!

Bye!

Sunday 3rd  Jonas came round to mine today. When it got dark we decided to go for a drive. We found a nice dark farm track and went up it but the car got stuck in the mud. I had to get out and push but it didn’t work so Jonas (mid-panic cos if we’d asked for help it would’ve looked very dodgy!) dismantled a bit of stone wall and put it under the wheels. Thankfully it worked.

Instead, we stopped at the top of Storthes Hall Lane (just left of it) and did some stuff. Then a big Land Rover thing stopped in front of us. We panicked again and put our clothes back on very fast. We weren’t having much luck really. Grrr!!

We went back to mine and melted some chocolate and then had a shower to wash it off!

Bye!

He asked if we could try a 69 – 25th to 28th February 2002

Monday 25th  Jonas met me after uni today and we went for a drive in his car once it got dark. We stopped on Castle Hill with a nice view of Huddersfield at night, put the front seat forward and then got on the back seat and did stuff. 🙂 Hee hee!

Well, we did until some other car came and it stopped right by us. I’d been paranoid people driving past could see in so when someone stopped we both grabbed our clothes and drove off (dressed of course!). It was fun!

We went back to Jonas’s afterwards and he kept growling and tugging at my clothes but we fell asleep in the end.

Bye!

Tuesday 26th  Tonight Jonas said, “Can I ask you a question?” so when I cautiously said yes he asked if we could try a 69! I felt manky and I wasn’t entirely sure I wanted to so I told him “not now”. He’ll probably ask again but I think I’d rather he didn’t! He still said I was great and sexy and called me a “sex kitten” even though I refused.

Earlier on when I was running down a hill, Jonas said it was like Baywatch! I think not!!

Bye!

Wednesday 27th  Jonas stayed over last night and again tonight. He told me he’d never go with anyone else cos he’ll never find anyone like me because I’m “perfect”. That’s sooo sweet! 🙂 He said he loves me too and I’m great and stuff and we had a shower together.

I wasn’t expecting to see him tonight but I phoned him and he decided to come round. It was while I was watching Sex and the City and there was a soppy bit which made me really want to see Jonas. It was nice when I did. I like him having a car!

Bye!

Thursday 28th  Jonas picked me up after uni and took me bck to his house. We just cuddled because we’ve both got colds and were tired.

Bye!