I got that weird feeling in my stomach – 20th October 1998

Tuesday 20th Phew! I didn’t have to do the interview thing. Our careers teacher wasn’t in so we had Mr P-K instead.

I think Freddie’s getting a lot of stick for what he did coz almost everyone knows what happened. Not that he doesn’t deserve it coz all Emma did with Suzanna was put the chance in front of him and then I think he got a bit carried away. I think she’s feeling a bit guilty though after the letter he gave her and she’s getting a lot of sympathy.

I think Ralph’s trying to get in with Emma again. I know he is. Ralph and Davis both are but Emma won’t listen. I don’t think Davis has tried anything yet but Ralph has. She made me promise not to say anything about it but, on her way home last night, she was with Ralph and she was asking him about this girl at his work who he says he fancies. He told her she was called Emily and that she had Emma’s hair colour and wore her hair in a bun like Emma does and, in fact, she looks a bit like her.

She said that he put his head on her shoulder. (Yuk! She’ll have been covered in little bits of Ralph’s flaky head!) She told me that he asked her if she wanted his fag and she said no and he said, “Well, can I have a kiss then?” She told him that it wasn’t a good idea considering what’s just happened and he said that Freddie didn’t have to know. I don’t think she did anything with him.

She also told me that the other day, sorry, yesterday he said to her that she should go down to the field at break. She said she didn’t really want to because of Freddie. He said she didn’t have to talk to Freddie, he could talk to him coz she could go out with him not instead. Creep!

I’ve been saying for ages that he fancied her and that I’d bet he’d make a move if she wasn’t going out with Freddie. It’s a good feeling when you’re right, innit?!

I do like Ewan. I wasn’t sure for a while. I did like him in Paris coz there weren’t many other okay lads but when we got back to school, Ferny was there so I sort of forgot about Ewan. Then when Emma told me what happened with Corrine’s hand, I went right off him. But since Robert told him I fancied him and Emma had the discussion about me with him in Art and he said he was flattered and I was alright, I’ve decided I like him again.

I got that weird feeling in my stomach too when I looked him in the eye when we were going opposite ways on the stairs.

Lindsey dragged William [Ferny] over to me and Emma at break and asked him if he fancied anyone. He just said no and walked off, giving her a funny look. I think she was asking for Hayley actually. I still really like him and think he’s gorgeous but I don’t think I’ve got much chance with him. I don’t think anyone has actually, unless you’re called Petra and work as a ski instructor in Radstadt, Austria! Never mind!

I said I’d go on the Big One with Cameron at Blackpool tomorrow coz we are going now and I said I’d probably chicken out and he said he’d go on with me coz he’d not been on before. I think he’s a bit worried actually.

BYE!

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