I was very, very, very pissed off – 23rd April 2002 – Part 4

Tuesday 23rd continued  I’ve been to Manchester twice with Jonas to try and get tickets for T in the Park but unsuccessfully so we ended up buying loads of clothes and stuff in Affleck’s Palace instead.

There were rumours going round that Jake was seeing Sophie but Archie set me straight and said they just snogged and stuff a few times cos Jake isn’t that interested. That was during a good night in the Arb. Jonas ended up quite tipsy and asked if I’d marry him (in the future!). I said I would. He said he wants to be with me forever again. 🙂 He also bought condoms over the counter for the 1st time. What an achievement! 🙂

Anyway, since I’ve been back after Easter, my main concerns has been looking for a house for me, Archie, Jen and Kevin. It has caused me much stress cos I’ve been the one doing the ringing round etc. and being told “Sorry, the house has been taken” over and over again.

We looked round a house in Birkby owned by someone Archie works with. The house was quite nice but we’ve been told to avoid Birkby and Fartown in the past. So, I carried on going through uni’s house list and managed to make an appointment to see 3 on the same day. The 1st was a total dump. We decided we didn’t want to live in it before we even got inside! It had 4 bedrooms and 2 tiny kitchens and smelled funny.

The other 2 however were owned by the same people and they were much nicer. We found it hard to decide which one we wanted but eventually picked the 3rd one. They only problem with it is the scrap heap of a garden the bloke nextdoor had. Our landlord said he’s just a retired and nice enough bloke. Inside OUR house (I like saying that) is quite spread out. There’s quite a big lawn at the front with an old people’s home opposite and a Baptist church nextdoor on the right. The address is: 20 Cross Lane, Primrose Hill. But the house faces onto Industrial Street because it’s a quad terrace thing. It’s only about 10 minutes walk from uni. There’s a room in the attic and then a tiny study, bathroom and bedroom on the 1st floor. There’s a bedroom in the basement and one off the living room/kitchen area. Hazel and her mate, and Sophie will be living near us and there are loads of other student houses round there too. 4 lads are living in ours at the moment.

We picked rooms the other day cos we all want to know where we’ll be so we can plan ahead. We wrote all the rooms on pieces of paper, screwed them up and picked. Archie picked 1st, read it and while Kevin was whinging he didn’t want to pick first, he put it back. That made it unfair from the start. We did it again and I was very, very, very pissed off with the outcome:

Attic – Jen

Basement – Kevin

Next to bathroom – Archie

Next to kitchen – me

Jen got exactly what she (and I) wanted so she was hyper and smiling like mad. Kevin also got exactly what he wanted. Archie was just relieved he didn’t pick my room (probably for what would’ve been the 2nd time) because I got the room nobody wanted. The reasons none of us really wanted it were as follows:

  • It’s longer and narrower than the others and so it looks smaller.
  • It seems darker.
  • It’s right off the kitchen/living room so if work/sleep is needed to be done, we’d get disturbed.
  • It’s downstairs.
  • Have to walk through the kitchen/living room to get upstairs to bathroom.

So, I’m basically not very impressed, although I’ve got a bit more used to the idea than at first. I’m just going to try and get all my work stuff done in the study even though Jen said no (which I thought was incredibly selfish seeing as she got the attic) and I only persuaded Archie to let me have a few extra shelves. We should’ve agreed to start with that whoever got my room got that cos it’d be fairer and would’ve been compensation.

Anyhow, the main reason why I’m annoyed is because I did all the work to find us a house and I got the worst room but Kevin, who did fuck all and found eating pizzas more important than houses, got exactly what he wanted. It’s just not on! Grrr!!

I don’t know how but I’ve got to try and make my room really cool so everyone else wishes they’d got it. Maybe I can escape out of the window too.

Archie told me twice about Jen slagging me off to him recently. Once she said I was being bitchy about Maths coursework when I hadn’t said anything even though she “forgot” we were meant to be doing it and went to Morrisons instead. Then again she said to Archie that I’d seemed in a bad mood recently. Archie said I hadn’t. I hope she’s not going to turn out to be really moody and awful to live with.

Last Wednesday, everyone went and sat out on the grass at Storthes cos it was lovely and warm and sunny. Jake said Jen and I could come to his BBQ if we wanted but we didn’t bother.

Jonas has been really nice to me whilst I’ve been stressing about various things. He’s given me loads of cuddles and things and just been generally sweet. I wouldn’t want to be without him. I love Jonas 🙂 Mmm!


He’s only 80% sure I love him – 23rd April 2002 – Part 3

Tuesday 23rd continued  I came back to Huddersfield the evening of my test after stopping and seeing Auntie G and Grandma on the way back. Grandma’s back at home again now with more home help.

I phoned Jonas when my dad left my halls and he came round pretty soon after. It was pretty weird seeing him at first. We just had lots of hugs and little kisses. It was nice though. Jonas said he had to keep pinching himself and said he missed me and loves me. It was sooo good seeing him again. Mmm! 🙂

That weekend I went with Jonas back to Gainsborough because his dad’s moving house and Jonas had to check the house was okay while his dad’s in the Falklands. The house is very nice. We went to Lincoln with his sister and drove around a lot taking keys to various people.

Everyone was very nice to me again. Jonas’s mum let us have her bed which I thought was very kind and trusting! We did get up to level 5 in it but stopped before anything happened. Jonas said he just wanted to lie there naked with me. It’s the first time we’ve shared a proper, comfy double bed!

When I got back to Huddersfield, I got to my 2nd lecture to be told I failed my Statistics tests by 2 marks. Grr!! I’ve got to resit it and the most I can get is 40%. I also saw Jonas for the 1st time in Huddersfield when he hasn’t been with me. We were in the Kingsgate Centre with our mates.

That Monday night, I had quite a good night in Camel. Jonas was very pissed and was putting on Jen’s eyeliner and lip gloss. Bronwen said Jonas is a “wicked dancer” as he moshed about on his own on the dancefloor. I briefly saw Jake who pecked me on the cheek and congratulated me on passing my driving test and saw loads of other people I knew.

I left early with Jonas and he came back to mine. For some reason he said he’s only 80% sure I love him as much as he loves me cos of Jake and Archie. I don’t know why cos I do! It’s scared me cos I don’t want him to think that. Jonas also said he’d marry me if he could but he doesn’t want to scare me. I’m not scared 🙂 I like that idea (but obviously not now)! He said he wants to be with me forever. 🙂 Mmm!

The next day, Jonas said he only said the 80% thing cos he was pissed but he does want to marry me and have babies with me (EEK! to the 2nd bit! It looks horrible!). He said he always wondered why people get engaged at uni and now he knows. It’ll be more special than it is already if he ends up being my longest lasting boyfriend. I hope he is!

Since then I’ve been quite busy. I’ve been out quite a few times and had houses to sort out etc. I’ve been to the cinema to see Bend It Like Beckham and Oceans 11 which were both very good.

I also went out to Bar Non which was an okay night. I was pretty drunk!

I’ve been told never to let on I know – 23rd April 2002 – Part 2

Tuesday 23rd continued  The main reason for me coming home was so I could do my driving test at 1:33pm on 12th April. All but the lesson but one before my test had gone okay but the one that went wrong (and I got upset) really worried me.

The day before my test, Denny, Isaac and Rocky invited me for a day out with them. We went to the Lowry Centre first after seeing Cat at work (I didn’t see Dodgy Dirty Dan but I saw Dougie). We then changed direction and went to Liverpool to see Sarah which was nice. It was a good day, I enjoyed it. Denny gave me 2 cards (one for my birthday last November and one for tomorrow) as well.

It was really not nice not hearing from Jonas much over the holidays. His mobile gets no signal and he has no credit so he couldn’t even text me. He was going to come and see me but couldn’t afford it which was a bit disappointing. I spent a lot of time thinking about me and Jonas though and some of that was worried thinking. At one point I felt like I wasn’t missing him as much as I did Jake but then I trust Jonas and I knew where he was and who he was with pretty much. Also, the hols were only 3 weeks and I think being apart from someone for 3 months in the past has made it more easy going.

I also began thinking that this love thing’s new to him but not to me and I kind of want Jonas to be my first love cos then it’s equally as special for us both. Still, he’s ‘had’ more girls than I’ve had lads. I hope we’re together for a long time cos then it will be very special cos we’ll be each other’s longest relationship.

I really do love Jonas and I missed him sooo much over Easter. I wouldn’t want anyone else. He did ring me a couple of times and I phoned him too. He told me he was bored too and 4 of his sister’s mates fancy him (GRRR!!) but they don’t know he’s taken. He was disappointed when we thought I might not be able to go to T in the Park cos of a fieldtrip but I can. Every time we spoke he said he loves me and misses me. 🙂

I got a few texts off him when he nicked his sister’s phone. One said, “ I am missing u + can’t wait to see u again! Bloody phones messing about – sorry : ) u ringing me 2mo? Looking forward to it. I was thinking about u when u rang. Love j x”. He kept telling me on the phone he couldn’t wait to see me and hugged the phone and made kiss noises to me!

Right, back to my driving test then. Since Abby did hers a few days before, I’d been really nervous cos she passed and it kind of put the pressure on for me to pass 1st time. However, Dad accidently let it slip that Abby didn’t actually pass 1st time, she failed her 1st attempt a month earlier. I was really pleased he told me cos it really took some pressure off. I’ve been told never to let on I know.

Even so, before my test I was incredibly nervous. My instructor (Charles) had been warning me about a “little Hitler” examiner and how he was really tough so when he came into the room and called my name I felt even worse.

I got going okay and did a perfect 3-point turn but when it came to reversing round a corner, I totally messed up. I almost hit the curb and realised but I couldn’t remember how the hell I could sort it out. In the end (after sitting there with a blank mind for a minute or 2), I pulled forward and reversed again and hoped for the best.

I really thought I’d blown it. For the rest of my test I could see the guy (Chris, I think he’s called) putting marks on the sheet so I just wanted to get it over with.

Just as I was halfway into the parking space at the end, I managed to stall the car which was more embarrassing than anything else cos my instructor saw. I really thought I’d failed so when he said, “I’m pleased to tell you you’ve passed” I was sooo shocked. I only got 8 minor faults too!

It still hasn’t really sunk in yet cos I haven’t driven anywhere. My sister has but I’ve not been insured on the car.

I had my arse slapped by a mosher girl – 23rd April 2002 – Part 1

[This entry is lonnngggg and I can’t be arsed to type it up all in one go so I’ll post it in stages…]

Tuesday 23rd  Right. Due to me being busy/lazy, I haven’t really had chance to write everything down properly so instead I’ll just sum up what’s been going on over the last month or so. The main part of the Easter hols involved me being bored at home, waiting for Jonas to text me, but I did do some more interesting stuff.

My mates and I had a trip to Ainsdale Beach, equipt with BBQs and spades, for a day which was fun. We survived food poisoning for the 3rd time which was lucky cos I’m sure our Asda economy meat wasn’t entirely cooked!

We also did The Run [pub crawl] a few more times before going back to uni but not all that much happened. I found out that my ex-music teacher’s baby is called Joshua and it was due on my birthday, and also that Cat and Isaac recently snogged and Cat quite likes him!

[Cat, Karen, Lizzie and I on The Run with our trusty pints of diesel.]

We also had a Friday night out in Manchester for Denny’s birthday which was fun. We started in Teasers then went to Soft then Gethin dragged me and Cat to Canal Street and taught us his ‘gay dance’.

We met up with the others in Elemental, had a quick look in Temple then made our way to Jilly’s. I was really pissed but I remember most of it. Cat and Floyd snogged, I had my arse slapped by a mosher girl and I also had scruffy Neil (a chef at The Green Dragon) coming on to me. Yuck! John (who liked me on photos) from Aberystwyth was okay. I talked to him a bit and he asked when I’d be visiting Denny and Gethin in Aber.

I went on a couple of shopping trips over the hols too. I went with Mum and Abby to Manchester and Warrington. We saw Tyrone out of Coronation Street with Darren out of The Royle Family in Warrington too.

The Queen Mother died while I was at home too. That was very sad. I watched all the processions and the funeral cos I’ve never seen anything like it before.

Tired, stressed and full of wine – 25th to 27th March 2002

Monday 25th  I had my first driving lesson for ages today at 9am. It didn’t go too badly actually.

I went to The Green Dragon later to see Gethin later but he was working so he couldn’t speak much. I also got bored and decided to have a read of Jake’s emails. I found one in his sent box to Emma Thornley on 7th October (not long after we split up) telling how I’d phoned him in tears about stalkers so I couldn’t complain if she visited cos I’m wanted by lots of people. At the end it said, “I love you lots + lots + lots……” and stuff. Cat said Emma’s got a boyfriend in Hull but I’m still very annoyed cos there must have been something going on. Fuckers!

It also made me think about Jonas and how I’m not seeming to be missing him as much as I did Jake but then he’s not as far away and I know who he’s with and I trust him. Plus I’ve got stuff to do so it takes my mind off missing him a bit. I really want to hear from Jonas though. I do love him.


Tuesday 26th  My second driving lesson today went okay again.

I finally got a text from Jonas saying his exhaust fell off his car and “miss u. xxx” at the end. 🙂 That was it though. He’s got no signal or credit.

I had a massive argument with Mum tonight just cos I asked when Abby’s driving test is. I tried to say I can imagine how bad she feels about Grandma but also how Mum turns everything round to blame herself and make me feel guilty. She called me cruel, vile, self-centred, jealous and “no daughter of mine” and pathetic and told me to get the train back to Huddersfield tomorrow. She said, “Get out of my home” as if it wasn’t mine and accused me of scrounging off her and Dad and demanding stuff like laptops. She also yelled at me for not having a job, saying I’m “workshy”.

I’m so upset! I hardly said anything to trigger it either. I was actually looking forward to coming home too. I want Jonas!

I apologised to Mum but she yelled at me so I apologised again and she yelled to get out of her room. I should keep out of the way like Dad and Abby. I don’t learn! She said, “Sorry’s just a word”.


Wednesday 27th  Mum doesn’t hate me. 🙂 She said she didn’t mean all the stuff she said cos she was just tired, stressed and full of wine!

I seem to have got a cold but I felt well enough to do a driving lesson and do The Run [pub crawl] with Denny, Rocky and Cat. Denny said his mate Jim fancies me from the photos he’s seen and the others have asked who I am or said I’m nice.

We met up with Floyd in The Green Dragon. He seemed pleased to see us. It was funny tonight listening to uni stories and stuff and me mishearing “juggling monkeys” as “dribbling monkeys”!


I might’ve given him food poisoning – 22nd to 24th March 2002

Friday 22nd  I was at Jonas’s today. We were in bed for quite a while We got to level 5 but he ignored me so I was in a bit of a mood for a while. I snapped out of it cos it’s not really his fault and I felt mean.

We had a walk round Greenhead Park for a while which was nice and watched people on the skate park.


Saturday 23rd  Jonas came back to mine today. We got bored though because most people have gone home so we decided to go for a walk in the woods with a picnic. It’s really nice there and there’s a river which we followed. It was fun climbing trees and hills and stuff and trying to spot magpies cos Jonas reckons he’s never seen one in Britain. When we got back to Storthes we lay in a field for a bit, completely knackered after climbing a hill. It was nice.

Tonight, Jonas felt really ill. I think I might’ve given him food poisoning with lasagne. He felt sick and stuff but said it helped when I rubbed his tummy. He was worrying me though cos he was breathing funny and stopped breathing altogether sometimes.

He’s taken some photos of me off my wall and my Miffy bag to take home with him. He said it’s weird how we met and have stuff like music etc. in common.


Sunday 24th  I don’t want to not see Jonas for 3 weeks. I wasn’t sure how much I’d miss him last night but I will miss him sooo much. I love Jonas! We kept telling each other we love each other and hugging and saying we’ll miss us. I got in his car before he went and he said he’ll write a song for me (cool!) and told me he never used to be as happy as he is now because of me! 🙂 MmmJonas!! When he left I got a kiss through the window and I ran down to the road so I could wave goodbye.

Dad picked me up this afternoon and we stopped off at the Meadowview home Grandma’s been put in after wandering and getting found by a man who called the police when she couldn’t find her house. It’s not very nice in there, Mum says, and Grandma’s confused.


She’s just stalking him! – 21st March 2002

Thursday 21st  The bus was late after uni today so I had a long conversation with Ben which mainly consisted of him moaning about Kevin. He’s a bit sick of Kevin following him round everywhere and inviting himself places and showing off about stuff. I feel a bit sorry for Kevin now. I didn’t realise other people had a problem with him too.

Ben also said his ex, Jody, is going out with Jake. That’s who I saw him with the other week after Bar Non. Ben said they call her Dopey cos she is and she isn’t too hard to pull. She’d told Ben she’s got a new boyfriend and Kevin said it was Jake.

It made me think and wonder if Jake and other people talk about me and slag me off to people like Jonas does about his exes. I wonder if Jake has still got pictures and letters from me. He had some on display when we started uni.

I failed (probably) my Microbiology test today.

We all went out to Bar Non tonight. I saw Storecard and Jake. Jake hugged me hello and we talked for quite a while. I asked about Jody and he said he doesn’t want a girlfriend and she’s just stalking him! He flatmate told him she gets “attached” to people. She’s from the Isle of Man and has gone back already. He said she’s too quiet (I wasn’t too quiet apparently) and he’s got too much on.

He said he wants to come to Manchester if we go at Easter and he’s probably going to Canada in a year out. He’s going skiing at Easter. Grr! I’m jealous! He snogged Sophie from Archie’s flat apparently. He kissed me on the cheek when I left. Hmm.

Bronwen and Sophie were slagging off Jake’s girly flatmates with me in Wetherspoons. : ) Fun!


Ghosts and weird people – 19th & 20th March 2002

Tuesday 19th  Everybody went out tonight. Oh, except me. I decided too late that I wanted to join them but everyone had already gone and Jonas was with me. I felt left out but I like being with Jonas. He had no money left so he couldn’t come out either. Instead we went for a drive.

Jonas kept asking if I was missing out because of him but, even if I was, that’s my choice. I’d rather be with him but then I still don’t like missing stuff. I can’t have it both ways though (until he gets some money maybe!). I don’t want to be knackered on the fieldtrip tomorrow either.

We drove past Visage to see if we could see any of my mates (we didn’t) and then went up to Castle Hill. It was dark and I was a bit scared of ghosts and weird people but we got out of the car and walked up to the tower. I’m sure I saw the door open! We stood at the top of the hill for a bit cos you can see nearly all of Huddersfield, trying to pick out places we knew like the uni buildings. It was quite nice cos Jonas was stood behind me hugging me, until I got scared again and ran back to the car. Jonas said he enjoyed it.

When we got back, we watched TV for a bit then went to bed. We got to level 5 but had to stop cos it was hurting me a bit for some reason.


Wednesday 20th  We had a Water Science fieldtrip to a pond today, kick-sampling again. The lecturer guy stopped me at one point and told me to hold out my hand. I wasn’t all that keen until I saw a leg sticking out of his hand. It was a toad. I bet he expected me to scream and run away!

Kevin was annoying me a bit. He kept going on about catching fish (seriously) and going in the muddy bit even though we’d been told not to cos we’d sink.

Jonas came round this evening. I spoke to my mum and sister too. Abby’s got her driving test just before mine but won’t tell me when.


We quite fancy the idea of a barbed wire toilet seat – 14th to 18th March 2002

Thursday 14th  Jen, Archie and I went to Bar Non tonight. We were discussing stuff about the house we might be living in next year and how we’re going to decorate it. We quite fancy the idea of a barbed wire toilet seat!

Archie kept being all flirty with me and pinching my arse. He said mine’s nicer than Bronwen’s too and I know how much he fancies her. I felt a bit guilty, like I was doing stuff behind Jonas’s back, even though I wasn’t.

I saw Layla’s mate Claire out as well as Storecard. They both spoke to me briefly.

I was pretty pissed and so were the other two. Jonas picked up all up and we nicked a couple of road signs:

Jonas and I went up to my flat first and he said I was cute when I was pouting for a kiss and flapping my arms about. I think I lay on the kitchen floor too which is not recommended due to lumps of chicken korma and stuff being on it too. We got some of my things and went to his house.


Friday 15th  We stayed at Jonas’s most of the day but I managed to get a bit of my Microbiology coursework done.


Saturday 16th  Jonas got up very early (for the first time since I’ve known him!) to watch the F1. I didn’t. We stayed in (apart from a trip to the uni library) and played Worms on the Playstation a lot.

Jonas said it won’t be right not seeing me for 3 weeks over Easter and sleeping on his own. He’s right.


Sunday 17th Jonas got up very early AGAIN to watch the F1. He came with me back to Storthes later on. We saw Jake there with his girl flatmates and when I thought I’d lost my keys, Jonas was driving right up behind them through the car park when they were in the car in front of us. My keys were actually in a plaster box in my bag.

Jonas was all cuddly tonight. We did stuff.


Monday 18th  I had a very evil maths (statistics) test today. I couldn’t do much of it at all. The last question was worth 20 marks and I ran out of time before I started it. I know I’ve failed that one.

Jonas stayed at mine again. 🙂


Levels 1-4 on the street in daylight – 9th to 13th March 2002

Saturday 9th  I stayed at Jonas’s last night and slept on his floor with him (on a mattress). We stayed there most of the day before going to the cinema and watching Monsters Inc. It was very good! I liked For the Birds at the beginning too. It was funny!

We ate McDonald’s stuff in the car afterwards and then went back to Jonas’s to bed.


Sunday 10th  Jonas came back to mine today. Cat rang me and told me she and Dan did levels 1-4 on the street in daylight in Warrington. Okay!


Monday 11th  After our lectures today, Jen and I went on a shopping trip to Leeds. It was only £3 on the train and was very good for shops. I bought some nice big trousers and black bracelets from H&M. The trousers were from Ark I think.

We saw a lad out of Jake’s flat in Leeds and then again when we got back to Huddersfield. I think Jen quite fancies him!


Tuesday 12th  Jonas stayed over and we did stuff.


Wednesday 13th  I had a Water Science kick sampling field trip today. I quite enjoyed it cos it was a nice day. I got sent into the river with waders on while the lads in my group stood at the edge and took notes. We (well I) caught a lot of creatures but I felt a bit guilty cos all the poor little bugs are going to be put in alcohol so we can see them in the lab later.

Jonas stayed over and said he’ll miss me at Easter. I’ll miss him too.