All I wanted to do was snog Leon – 21st-22nd December 1999

Tuesday 21st I went ice skating today with a few members of Lizzie’s swimming club. There was me, Lizzie, Amir, Damon, Becki, Leon and Brett and Leon’s nephew. It was quite good apart from the fact that all I wanted to do was snog Leon. At one point, Damon said Leon still fancied me but I think it was only because Leon’d said Damon fancied Lizzie. Damon was also nodding his head and pointing in my direction after getting Leon’s attention, as in a ‘go for it’ kind of way. I wish he had’ve done!

When we were on the bus, Becki was going through Leon’s phone and ringing his mates and telling them she loved them and stuff. One of them was Reevesy (Brett said he still likes me) but I don’t know if he believed it. Later on, Lizzie and I were giving Becki numbers to phone, one of which was Aled’s. She rang but he was out so she just told whoever answered that she was Tess. I hope he doesn’t ring me back now.

Zoe kept phoning because she knew Brett was there but he didn’t want to speak to her coz he says he can’t stand her!

I saw Oscar’s new girlfriend in McDonald’s earlier on today. He pointed her out coz he was working. She’s not really pretty or anything but she looks really nice.

I think I like Leon again now, damn it! I hardly spoke to him but I can’t help it. Lizzie’s not sure if he’s going out with Becki or not but I think it’s pretty likely seeing as his phone’s full or messages from her.

Gethin’s now seeing Lizzie officially. We rang him and I made him ask her and it worked!

BYE!

Wednesday 22nd Aled phoned this evening to see if I’d phoned him yesterday! I explained what’d been going on and he just told me that he’d heard about Gethin and Lizzie, and Gethin and Hayley at the party. That was about it.

I got a certificate at kickboxing tonight to show I’m now a white belt. We were doing a bit of self-defence and a jump side kick and a more complicated back kick thing. It’s so good!

Zoe informed me earlier that she’s now going out with Brett. He is one confused lad! It was only yesterday that he was saying how much he couldn’t stand her but I now think that was only coz Lizzie was there.

BYE!

She’s such a slapper – 12th December 1999

Sunday 12th I received a text message from Lizzie last night which has put me in yet another awkward position. The message said, “TESS, GETHIN JUST SENT ME THE FOLLOWING MESSAGE. WHAT’S GOING ON?… MY LIFE BELONGS WITH YOU. SEE YOU SOON, LOVE GETHIN XXX”

This is a problem because I had just reassured Sarah that it is not Gethin that fancies Lizzie because Emma had been saying on Friday that someone did but wouldn’t say who. Sarah really likes Gethin so I promised to find out if it was him. Emma told me it wasn’t but going by that message and the way he’s been flirting with Lizzie, I think Emma must be lying.

Now I have to make the decision of either keeping quiet and letting Sarah find out herself in a possibly bad way or telling her myself and breaking it to her gently. I think I might just leave it as it is not definitely true.

I had a phone call from Zoe this evening. She told me that this weekend she’d phoned Brett and asked him if he wanted to go bowling with her, Rochelle and Chloe because she “felt sorry for him”. Did she bollocks feel sorry for him! She asked him because she fancies him and also because she doesn’t like Lizzie so she thought it might be a good way to hurt her feelings.

The next confession was pretty much what I expected her to have done because she’s such a slapper. She snogged him and is now “sort of seeing him”. Not only did she begin to slag off Lizzie to me but she then had the nerve to say, “Will you stick up for me if anyone starts slagging me off tomorrow?” Well, I came straight out and said very simply, “No”.

How can she seriously expect me to stick up for her when she is in the wrong after she’s spent weeks doing exactly the opposite in the Hayley situation for me when I’m not totally at fault? That really pissed me off!

While I was at it, I told her to stop slagging off Lizzie to me too because I’m mates with her and it’s unfair to say things at all, never mind to me. I know her intention is that I go back and repeat it all to Lizzie but I won’t because there’s no need for her to know really. It’d only upset Lizzie.

So much for it taking Brett 18 months to get over Lizzie! Leon, Reevesy and Chris (Leon’s nephew) also went bowling. The fact that Leon went made me feel really jealous, although I don’t know why because as far as I know he didn’t do anything with anyone.

BYE!

I’d rather be single over Xmas and the Millennium – 6th December 1999

Monday 6th I was right about Hayley. All she wanted to tell me was about this lad who fancied her at LA Bowl. Her version was that, just as she was going to do something about it, he left. Zoe’s version was that Hayley was being soft and scared about it even after he left. I think Zoe’s story’s more believable.

Those 2 have spent all day slagging each other off too. They’re not getting on well. Hayley thinks Zoe’s a slapper (I think it’s jealousy because Zoe has the guts to go for lads) and Zoe thinks Hayley’s just generally annoying (this is true but she probably also knows Hayley’s opinion of her and doesn’t like it).

Lizzie told me this morning that, she’s not sure, but Leon and Becki might be going out again. I’m not too bothered if they are because I think I’d rather be single over Xmas and the Millennium instead of tied down to one lad!

The story is that at swimming yesterday, Becki was whining on about how she really liked Leon but she told Lizzie that she just wanted to meet [snog] him (no commitment, just snogging every so often). Lizzie, having rather a large gob on her, let this slip to Damon who went and told Leon. Becki is now not very pleased with Lizzie. Apparently though, Brett and Damon were trying to put Leon off going back out with Becki. We’re not sure if they succeeded though.

Mrs C’s making each of us stand up in class tomorrow and teach everyone else parts of a Geography question. I hate doing things like that. I was seriously considering skiving until I remember it’s parents’ evening tomorrow night! Bugger!

BYE!

 

Really soft with stupid Elvis hair – 1st-4th December 1999

Wednesday 1st There was quite a bad car accident on the way home from kickboxing tonight. One car was on its side and another was upside-down in a field. The scary thing was that we were first there after the police. If we’d have left a few minutes earlier we could’ve been involved. I hate to see accidents like that, it really upsets me.

I still can’t stand Hayley. This morning, I think she was quite pleased to hear that Leon and Jodie were a potential item and then she started saying how Leon was really soft with stupid Elvis hair and that he reminded her of Richard Willers (who I wouldn’t exactly call good looking) deliberately loudly in front of everyone, I reckon to try and humiliate me. Bitch!

Then I had to put up with her all afternoon coz she tagged along with Rachael and I when we were delivering invitations to old people about the Xmas party at school. Rach doesn’t like Hayley either so neither of us were pleased.

BYE!

Thursday 2nd Not much happened today. Lizzie said that Jodie doesn’t fancy Leon and that she’s happy with the boyfriend she’s got. Good!

Later, Gethin told me and Lizzie that we were 2 of his favourite girls along with Emma and Suzanna. Aaah, sweet!

BYE!

Saturday 4th I went to see the new James Bond film ‘The World Is Not Enough’ last night with Cat, Lizzie and Poppy. It was quite a good film but it ended really late. Before out film, we had an hour or so to waste so Lizzie phoned Brett and he and that lad from bonfire night came to meet us there for a bit. There wasn’t much mention of Leon, only Brett asking if I still liked him but I lied and said no.

When we got into the film, Cat ended up with Charlie Wilson sat behind her (she snogged him in Belgium). He and the lad he was with kept whispering and saying, “Chris Kelly-Banks” very loudly every so often!

I had a great dream last night! Hayley was yelling stuff at me so I started doing some kickboxing on her and she shut up so I started saying all the things that really need to be said and she then pissed off with no friends and left me alone. I don’t know what would’ve happened next coz my mum woke me up. I was quite disappointed to find out that it hasn’t all been real!

Sarah and Freda both went round to Hayley’s last night. No doubt they had a good bitch about me and possibly Lizzie.

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that during my free period yesterday some of my mates were trying to lift people up in a sitting position with only 4 people using 2 fingers. One person had to sit on a chair and the other 4 people stood around them and put their hands one over the other (but not touching) over the sitting person’s head. They counted to 10 and then they put 2 fingers under each arm and knee and lifted. It worked. Sarah went right up to the ceiling. I don’t know how it works though.

My sister’s going to the Coach Horse pub with her mates, May’s boyfriend and Ewan Swann coz they’re mates. I found myself feeling really pissed off coz Ewan was going. I don’t want to start fancying him again but I think I’m heading that way. The person I really want is Leon but he’s obviously just not interested.

BYE!

I don’t do honeymonsters! – 30th November 1999

Tuesday 30th I had a slightly better school day today. Zoe’s speaking to me again and by 3rd lesson so was Hayley but I still can’t stand the girl so when I got home I drew this: ↓

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It made me feel much better!

She was still being a bitch 1st thing, for example I tried to talk to her but she gave the childish comment of, “I think I just heard some sort of murmur.” Oh, grow up!

Freda also informed me after school that I was being discussed in their R.E. lesson this afternoon but that might just have been Freda trying to stir things.

I had a message on my phone from Lizzie this evening containing bad news. It said, “JUST SPOKE TO BRETT + HE SAID THAT JODIE HAD TOLD LEON SHE STILL LIKES HIM. DON’T GET IT. SHE HAS A BOYFRIEND ALREADY.”

Yet again I got my hopes up that I might be back in with a chance with Leon, only to hear this. Just my bloody luck!

Zoe phoned before and told me she’d spoken to Reevesy. He says he still likes me. Yuk, yuk, yuk!!! I don’t do honeymonsters! Lads cause way too much trouble!

BYE!

She shoved her nose high in the air – 29th November 1999

Monday 29th I had more trouble with Zoe and guess who else joined in? Yes, that’s right, Twisted Bitch Hayley. Zoe was absolutely fine with me on the way to school this morning and we were discussing the Reevesy situation quite openly. That all changed after the 1st lesson when she’d spent an hour with Hayley.

I got the hint 1st thing this morning that Hayley wasn’t best pleased with me because she stormed in and went into a corner with Emma, Freda, Georgia Dean, Lena and a couple of others and started flapping her arms wildly about in my direction whilst talking deliberately loudly, although all I heard was, “blah, blah, blah… I’m meant to be her best mate… blah blah”.

Best mate? She’s not been my ‘best mate’ for ages! I can’t stand the girl! She still thinks she has the right to have some sort of hold over me. A best mate is meant to be someone who you can relax around without having to watch what you say all the time. That does not describe Hayley. In fact, she’s completely the opposite!

Anyway, at break, Freda came up to me and warned me that I’d better watch myself coz Zoe and Hayley were really pissed off with me and were going to have a go. I was sat in a room with a few others when they arrived. They stood and talked to Freda for a while and then Hayley nudged Zoe, they whispered and laughed and then Zoe said, “Why didn’t you tell me about those messages from Reevesy last week?”

I began saying that I’d already explained why but the Twisted Bitch jumped in and started yelling, “Why did you show her the message that’d hurt her most and not all the nice ones which you thought were for you?!” It took me a few seconds to try and make sense of what she’d just said but then I realised I couldn’t so I just said, “You what?”

She began again saying the same thing so I told her, “That’s why I didn’t tell her about those messages to start with and I didn’t tell her about those messages to start with and I did show her all the others I got.” Then she yelled back at me, “Exactly!” and repeated what she’d already said twice.

It’s obvious that she doesn’t know what the fuck she’s talking about and, anyway, it’s got fuck all to do with her, she’s only got involved coz she’s got no real reason of her own to have a go at me. That girl needs a good bloody kicking!! I’d like to be the one to do it. Short term I’d feel much better for it but long term it probably wouldn’t do me any good coz she’d keep using it as a real excuse in the future. Bitch!

At lunch, Rachael Hollins made me feel a bit better by telling me that she’d told Zoe she was being really childish and pathetic. Then Emma, as usual, made me feel better by telling me that, 1st thing this morning, Hayley was making a complete fool of herself coz people were either sniggering (or trying really hard not to) as she ranted on about how I’d completely ignored her when she walked in. I had my back to the door, for fuck’s sake! Plus, I smiled at her when I did see her but she shoved her nose high in the air and turned away.

While Hayley wasn’t around, Zoe had spoken to me a bit but then in Geography she started writing notes to me about:

  • why I hadn’t told her about the messages
  • whether I’d do anything at Brett’s party with Reevesy (fuck off!!)
  • how I’d already done it to Sarah with Aled (obvious attempt to get Sarah on her side seeing as she was sat next to me and reading the notes)
  • why had I left her and Hayley out

and stuff like that. I answered as best I could, with much attempt to restrain myself from whacking her round the back of the head with something extremely hard, but what I said was only repeated what was said on Saturday, which she was fine about then.

I know it’s Hayley who’s cast all these doubts in her mind because now she’s actually found someone who has a genuine reason (kind of) to be pissed off with me.

So, as you can imagine, when I got home I was extremely pissed off. I decided to try and make myself feel better so I turned dance music up really loud and danced really hard and then I kickboxed and pretended I was aiming at Hayley and Zoe. And then, I did this: ↓

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I think it has quite a good resemblance. I’ve yet to do one of Twisted Bitch coz my tea was ready but I will. It’s good therapy!

Later on this evening, Zoe phoned and asked if I had any text messages from Reevesy. Then she decided she was speaking to me coz there was stuff she wanted to tell me (she snogged Big Paul. Yuk!!!). Then we got today’s argument sorted out and she said how she was torn between me and Hayley coz she’s rather be mates with me but she didn’t want to get on the wrong side of Hayley. I told her to just pretend she wasn’t speaking to me around Hayley if it made things easier.

She also told me that Hayley scared her a bit when she said that Zoe and Freda were her best mates at the moment. I seriously can sympathise with them, poor girls!

Apparently Lee’s ill coz he was sat on the hot poolside on Saturday and didn’t drink anything so he got dehydrated. I hope he’s okay soon.

BYE!

Serves him right for being a total tosspot! – 27th November 1999

Saturday 27th I went to Warrington with Cat today in search of Saturday jobs. The trip was unsuccessful because all the shops either had no vacancies or wanted CVs which we didn’t have.

I phoned Lizzie today while she was at Sheffield for swimming. I had previously had text conversations with Becki starting with a message from her saying, “I’VE JUST BEEN TOLD LEON LIKES JODIE. HE HAS NO CHANCE WITH HER COS SHE’S WITH SOMEONE. HE’S BEING A TOTAL NOBHEAD (AS USUAL!) LUV BEC.”

I sent one to her saying, “HI! SOD LEON. I DON’T CARE ANYMORE. I’M SICK OF BEING MESSED ABOUT. DO ME A FAVOUR + DROWN HIM OR SOMETHING!! LUV TESS.”

A few minutes later, Becki sent me another message saying, “GO GIRL! I HAD A GO ON WEDNESDAY + IT CARRIED ON TILL THURS. I CAN’T B ARSED WITH HIM BEING LIKE THAT. HE’S STARING LOOKING INTO SPACE. HE DESERVES IT! BEC.”

My next message to her said, “NICE ONE! WHAT DID YOU ACTUALLY SAY TO LEON WHEN U HAD A GO? HAVE YOU HELD HIS HEAD UNDER THE WATER YET?!”

Then she said, “UM NO Y? LEON’S PISSED OFF COS I’M WRITING 2 U! I TOLD HIM HE WAS PLAYING WITH EMOTIONS. HE WAS GOING 2 LOSE EVERYONE, HE HAS!”

That was the last message because when I was speaking to Lizzie she told me that Becki wanted to speak. She came on the phone and said hi and she started telling me how he was sitting on the poolside looking rejected! We just started saying how he’d lost out now coz he’s blown his chances with us both because he’s messed us about too much. That was about it really and I spoke to Lizzie for a while.

Leon hasn’t completely blown his chances with me because I can’t help but still like him. Although now I’ve spoken to Becki, I’d feel guilty doing anything with him.

I phoned Zoe this evening but she wasn’t in. She eventually rang back and asked what the hell was going on because she’d just been on the phone to Reevesy and he’d been jabbering on about something. I just told her and she hung up. I didn’t realise she had coz the woman came on saying, “Please hold the line” but then Zoe picked up the phone again and told me to go away.

I was worried that she’d never forgive me but then I realised I had done nothing to be forgiven for so I was then just pissed off that she’d reacted like that.

A while later she rang me back again. She said that she’d hung up before she shouted at me on the last phone call but that she’d now calmed down a bit. She asked me if I’d told Reevesy that she wasn’t really seeing Jav again (she’d told him she was to try and make him jealous) but I hadn’t and I told her that. It was actually Lizzie that told him but Zoe hates her enough as it is so I didn’t say that.

Zoe then asked if I’d just been on the phone to Reevesy myself because he’d told her that Leon, Lizzie and I had all phoned him today. I don’t know about the other two but he’s lying about me. I ended up telling Zoe that he’d phoned me earlier in the week too and she wasn’t very pleased about the fact I hadn’t told her sooner.

Eventually she accepted that all this isn’t actually my fault and she even ended up laughing about the whole situation. I’m still going to have to tread carefully round her for a while though I think.

She also spoke to Brett tonight so she could get his side of things. Reevesy denied everything but Brett backed me up with my side of it all. Apparently Reevesy was totally pissed off or something when I said no last night. Ha ha!! Serves him right for being a total tosspot!

I’ve just remembered something else Becki said when I spoke to her. She told me she’d showed Leon the message beginning “SOD LEON…” and he began to stare into space again I think. I feel mean now. He might not have messed us about deliberately. He could have been genuinely confused about it all and now he’ll think I don’t like him and I’m nasty and he’ll go off me. That’s if he ever liked me in the first place, mind you. I’m not entirely sure that he did.

BYE!