Adam has a ‘new love’ – 30th August 1999

Monday 30th Again, I’ve not really done a lot today. I went on the internet to help Abby with her Art work (that’s how bored I was!) and I had a quick chat with a lad called Barney Greer. I used to talk to his mate Adam loads and we even phoned and wrote to each other. We did arrange to meet up in June at Alton Towers but he couldn’t make it in the end. Pretty soon after that we kind of lost touch. I mailed him a few times but he didn’t reply.

Anyway, I also used to talk to Barney a bit and Adam’s mate Ronan but it was Barney who I usually got Adam-related information out of. Today we were just catching up because we’ve not spoken for ages either. He told me he got 4 As, 5 Bs and 3 Cs (I think) in his exams and that he’d been on holiday to Crete with Ronan.

I managed to turn the conversation round onto my holiday so I could tell him all about Duncan. I told Barney in hope that it’d get back to Adam because he probably thinks I miss talking to him or something. Barney then told me that Adam has a ‘new love’ from Manchester who’s 17 and he met her on holiday and Barney’s been told she’s really nice.

I’m ashamed to say I got a slight hint of jealousy when I was told that piece of information but I keep remembering what an ugly creep he really is! Anyhow, I’ve got my own lad now, even though I did leave him behind in Scotland so with any luck, Adam’ll get just a little bit jealous too if he gets to hear about it!

I keep on thinking about Scotland and Duncan and everyone else and what they might be doing. I really want Duncan to make some sort of effort to contact me but I don’t think it’s going to happen. I don’t know whether he’s trying to forget me, he fancies someone else, he only ever wanted a bit of experience with a girl and he doesn’t really care I’ve gone, or what.

It’s really annoying because I’ve got no way of finding out. Rhian’s absolutely hopeless when it comes to getting and telling information so she’s no use. I’ve made the effort to keep in touch by writing and e-mailing him but I’ve not had replies from either. I’m pretty fed up to be honest. It’d be better if I just wasn’t bothered but I bloody well am!

Abby’s found out more info on Ashley. She says he plays for a footy team called ‘The Groats’ or something with Cal Brown. That’s all though.


I kept waffling on about him – 28th August 1999

Saturday 29th Not a lot happened during the day, I just played about with my mobile phone. This evening though, Mum and Dad went out to Louise B’s wedding do so Abby had her friends round and Hayley came too. We just talked, went on the internet, played Pictionary and The Game of Life, and at one point decided to ring Rhian. She wasn’t at home, she was at Laura’s so Abby phoned there.

Duncan answered. He told Abby they weren’t there but then I decided I might as well speak to him. I wish I hadn’t now. I was just asking where Rhian was and stuff and he told me they were over the road then Hayley decided she wanted to speak and grabbed the phone off me. She started saying how I kept waffling on about him and how I started whining every time I saw the name Duncan on TV and stuff.

She told me afterwards that he sounded pleased but I tend not to believe much that Hayley tells me. She was probably just trying to avoid trouble with me.

I got the phone back and told him to ignore her and apologised for her and he said something about her being crazy. Then I mentioned I had a mobile phone now and asked if he wanted the number. He said, “Not just now, I’m just in the middle of something actually” or summit. I apologised and we said goodbye.

It really sounded like he was trying to get rid of me. That’s why I regretted speaking. He didn’t actually ask to speak to me either. Oh, but I still really like him and miss him so much.

I suppose h e could’ve been doing homework or something because he said he’d been busy with it when I said how I hadn’t heard from him for a while. Fair enough. I should’ve asked him what he was doing really, just to keep my mind at ease.

Rhian never phoned back either. I could’ve found out off her what he was doing otherwise.


I’ve probably failed them all – 25th August 1999

Wednesday 25th I met up with Keira, Emma, Patrick Campbell, Dougie and Stuart Hobbs at Warrington Bus Station this morning ready to go on a ‘mystery tour’ because we didn’t know where we were going to go. We were just going to jump on a train and go somewhere. I was actually late because I got the 10:10 bus instead of the 9:40 bus and, when Emma didn’t get on in her village, I got off, found a phone box and tried to phone Emma to see where she was but it was engaged so I stated walking home.

Mum drove past, stopped, picked me up and said they’d phoned saying they were waiting for me so she gave me a lift there. I ran to the bus station and eventually found them all, apologised, they laughed at me and we made our way to Warrington Central station. We looked down the list of places to go and chose Liverpool. We got on a train and went.

All we really did all day was wander round the Albert Dock, wander round the main shopping area and sit in McDonald’s, flicking a carton of tomato ketchup across the table to each other until it burst all over Stuart and Dougie.

We got this photo taken in a booth: (I am on it but very blurred!)


When we got bored of Liverpool, we came back to Warrington and went in McDonald’s. Then Dougie left because he had to go to work at that tennis centre thing so the rest of us went back to the bus station. The lads went home but Emma and I went back to Keira’s house for a bit.

The other 2 discussed Robert a lot and what Keira should find out for Emma (such as if he likes her) and I kind of groaned when ‘Better Off Alone’ came on the radio. They asked me why so I told them about Duncan although I didn’t go into too much details on what happened because I could feel myself going red.

I got in this evening and phoned Rhian to tell her that I gave the letter to Dougie today. (She wasn’t in but she rang back later.) I gave it to him at the bus station when I arrived and he took his time reading it. He wouldn’t show us so I think he took it seriously! He kept getting it out and reading it again all day. Then he started asking me questions about Rhian such as, “How old is she?” and “What does she look like?” I think I’ll have to show him a photo sometime.

Just before he went to work, I asked him if he had any messages for her and he said something like, “Tell her that as you’re giving her this message, I’m on my way up to Scotland so she’d better brace herself!” I think I’ve made his head enlarge rather considerably!

I get my GCSE exam results back tomorrow. I’m worried now. I was okay until about 9:00pm and then I got bored and began worrying. These are my predictions for how I’ve done:

English – C (if I’m lucky!)
Maths – D
Science – Fail
French – Fail
Geography – D
Food Tech and Business – Fail
P.E. – D
Art – C (if I’m lucky!)

I think that’s all the subjects. I might be pushing my luck a bit by saying I’ve got Cs and Ds. In reality, I’ve probably failed them all. Oh well, looks like I’ll be seeking employment as a bag packer in Tesco or something.

I’m really nervous now. I can see myself tomorrow finding out my results and being so bloody annoyed with myself because I know now I could’ve done better than I have. All the people around me will be satisfied at least because all my friends are clever. I’m not thick but when it came to the exams, I knew I’d not got a chance of getting the grades I should. I’d be happy if I got one A but I won’t have done. I don’t want to fail or get any Ds either but I’m bound to. I don’t think I’ll be getting too much sleep tonight.

These are my train tickets from today. I thought I may as well just stick them in. ↓


(I lied and said I was 15 to get half fare!)

I almost forgot, Rhian told me on the phone that she’d told Duncan he had to write to me and he said “Alright then” or something. I hope he does write back, I still really miss him. Rhian also said she’d got photos of Chin, Sanders (but he was hiding) and Ashley Ewart’s back so she’ll send them when she’s done more I think.

I’ll go away and panic now! AAARRGGHHH!!!


He really is a babe! – 24th August 1999

Tuesday 24th I saw John Baker from just down the road at 5:05pm today. He is so gorgeous. I was sat in the front room watching TV and he walked by on the pavement right outside. I got a really good look because his dog stopped and weed by our drive. He was wearing a black t-shirt, jeans and brown boots and looked lovely. He’s quite tall, quite thin with gelled forward black hair and glasses. He really is a babe!

He might be going to 6th Form college with us because he was at the open evening and put his name down for some courses. Part of me hopes he does go but part of me hopes he doesn’t. If he did then he might realise I exist and I’d probably see him loads on the way home but then again, some other girl’s bound to end up going out with him because he’s so good looking and I’d have no chance then.

Lena used to work with him in the bakery (he still does work there) and she said he’s really geeky but people he’s never met before won’t know that until maybe later on but he’ll already have a queue formed by then! Never mind, I’m taken for the moment anyway, even if my boyfriend is 100s of miles away and not keeping in touch.

Emma phoned this evening asking if I wanted to go out with the ‘Swing Band lot’ tomorrow. She was telling me about Saturday. Keira had been trying to phone because of the party and it ended up with her and Emma being the only two girls. I’m not too bothered about not going really because it seems that the only highlight for Emma was snogging Robert Osborne. She’s not sure what’s happening between them now though.

She also told me that Dominic Walters was there. That interested me because I’ve met him once before a while back when I was at the cinema watching Romeo and Juliet and he came with Robert (who he knows from climbing I think) and a couple of other lads. Hayley decided she liked him and was feeding him M+Ms all night. He was quite nice looking then and Emma said he still is but when he had had quite a bit to drink, he started going on about how he could tell which lads were good looking or something. I’ll have to tell Hayley that one!

I ♥ Duncan


P.S. Abby was on the internet earlier and Laura’s screen name came up on the Buddy List (it’s Laurm1) but nobody said anything to Abby and if it had’ve been Laura, she probably would have chatted so we think it might have been Duncan.

Whoever it was said “Hi” but then went offline. I hope it wasn’t Duncan because he might not have realised it was Abby online so he may have thought I was ignoring him. I hope not. I still miss him, you know.

I don’t think my mum knows – 22nd August 1999

Sunday 22nd Mum took Abby and I to Manchester today to get more stuff ready for going back to school. I ended up getting cheap stuff and not bothering with a pair of expensive shoes but this evening my mum’s decided to call me selfish.

She said it was because I made her carry my bags but, when I pointed out about the clothes and shoes, she’s now decided I’m selfish because I don’t want to go on the ski trip with school in February. The other day I said how annoying Cat had been with her moods in Belgium and how I didn’t really know if I could put up with her but I also feel really guilty that my parents have to pay about £1000 so Abby and I can go. Mum and Dad have already paid my £180 deposit and they can’t get it back I don’t think so I can’t not go now. Also, I’d be letting Cat down badly and she’d probably never speak to me again.

I do want to go though, I just can’t see it being as good as Austria but that doesn’t mean I won’t enjoy it. Mum just doesn’t believe me that I want to go. I just feel so guilty about it, that’s all.

We phoned Rhian this evening. Not a lot’s been happening up there either by the sounds of it. I started writing a letter to Duncan earlier on so I just asked her if I should send it. She said I should and that she’d make him write back. This is a copy of the letter:



She said she’s seen Duncan putting up a shelf… badly. But that’s it. Abby said that when she was speaking to Rhian, she heard Uncle G shouting something like, “Have Tess and Duncan spoken yet?” She also asked how Rhian’s mum knew. Rhian said she’d been talking to Laura and Duncan’s mum, I think, and then asked Rhian what she knew. Rhian said she didn’t know but I don’t believe her.

I don’t think my mum knows (but I’m not sure) because when she was talking to Auntie S before, she said something like, “They keep going on about what a wonderful holiday they’ve had but I’m not sure what was so good. I won’t ask, I don’t think.” Then they moved on to talk about Rhian’s, Abby’s and my plan to see each other in October. I don’t know if it’ll happen.


Monday 23rd Mum, Abby and I went to the Trafford Centre today for more shopping because we didn’t get it all done. I got fixed up with a pair of Pod boots and I also got a metally, flowery necklace, a new watch and a pack with an ankle/wrist bracelet, choker and ring in it. [Like these which are back in the shops at the moment. I’m old enough for fashions to come round again. Boooo!]

This evening I went to the Sports Club because Hayley wanted to watch Liverpool play Leeds on Sky. I didn’t want to watch it really but I was bored so I went anyway. It was weird because Hayley predicted before that Liverpool would win 2-1 and their scorers would be Camara and Fowler. She was right!

There were these 2 lads in there, one who we know because he works there and his mate. They were both nice but this tarty woman ended up chatting them up and taking them off to The Plough. But it was funny because on her way out, she tried to push the door open from the wrong side and walked head first into it, making a complete fool of herself! We weren’t the only ones she’d been annoying because Jack Eddison and Tunde S out of our year commented on her and laughed at her too.

I posted Duncan’s letter tonight. I also spoke to Rhian too who told me that he’s been busy because Kate’s apparently rather fit cousin who’s just turned 16 and who’s from Orkney is in Wick. He’s been going to their school while he’s there and has been hanging round with Duncan. He’s called Jamie. Rhian said she’d tell Duncan that a letter was on the way and that he has to write back. I hope he does and soon.


I saw one of the fittest lads I have ever seen! – 21st August 1999

Saturday 21st Mum, Abby and I went to Liverpool this morning. The reason behind us going was for Abby to do some Art research for school so we went in the Tate and Walker galleries.

In the Walker, I saw one of the fittest lads I have ever seen! He was tallish, tanned with gelled forward, darkish-blonde hair. I think he was called Daniel because some old woman was calling him over to her, although I’m not sure if that’s right.

After we left, I had a look round the shops for ages and I bought a pair of dark grey bootleg trousers and a light blue and white flowery top from Miss Selfridge. We were there for quite a long time in the end.

I think we got home at about 5:00 and Dad told me that Keira had phoned. I didn’t ring her back because I wanted to see what Hayley was doing first about this evening. I forgot about it in the end and took Mollie for a walk with Mum and Abby.

When I got home, Dad said Keira had phoned again and should be ringing around the time I got back. She didn’t and Abby wanted to use the internet so I rang her in the end. Robert answered and asked who I was (which is a bit embarrassing because he’s in (or was in) my form at school) but Keira wasn’t in. He said she’s gone out somewhere and that he’d give me the mobile number but he’d nicked it off her earlier. I just told him to let her know I phoned and we left it at that.

She probably went out with Emma which was probably why she was trying to get hold of me. It didn’t sound like there was a party going on when I was speaking to Robert either, although I could’ve been wrong. Anyway, I’d already decided I was going with Hayley.

So, this evening I ended up in The Plough. It’s a bit livelier than the Sports Club, I have to say! We saw this bossy cow, Amber Watson, out of our year in there but that’s it and I don’t think she saw us. I wasn’t there long coz we went in quite late but I quite enjoyed it. There’s a lot of rather nice looking lads who go in there too!

I kept forgetting that I’m not actually single, until I see couples together and I keep being reminded and thinking that it should be me and Duncan. That’s another reason why I might have felt guilty about going to the party, if there’d been some lad there and something had happened. Not that it’d be likely that Duncan’d find out but I can’t see him doing that to me so I’d feel guilty, especially seeing as it’s only a week since he asked me out. Maybe in a month or 2 when I’m bored of not having a lad and an opportunity comes along then maybe I won’t feel so awful. Actually, I probably would!

I think I’ll write to Duncan soon seeing as he seems to be making no effort to keep in touch. A letter’d probably be best because phoning’s way too expensive and e-mails would only be read by other people. I’m just worried he’d think it was sad to write letters, although he said he’d write to me. It doesn’t look like he’s going to so I’ll have to make the first move with this one. If I do, he’d better reply to me!


They’d probably find amusement in making me squirm! – 18th & 19th August 1999

Wednesday 18th I couldn’t stop crying last night because I was missing everyone so much in Wick. It’s horrible knowing it’s ages before I’ll see them all again. I just want Duncan to give my hand a comforting squeeze like he did when Melanie came over on Sunday night but I’m not going to get anything like that off him for a good few months.

I’m also worried that he won’t keep in touch. Abby was online tonight and Laura came on too but all they really chatted about was Ashley Ewart. We mailed Laura and told her to get Duncan to mail me but I’m not sure that he will and phoning’s too expensive and writing a letter takes time. We’ll see I suppose.

I went to see Hayley this afternoon. I told myself I wouldn’t go on and on about Scotland because she might have got jealous and gone all moody but I did… constantly. Surprisingly though, she didn’t seem to mind. I thought she might get on my nerves too because she was doing a bit before I went away but I actually found that I was quite glad to see her after all.


Thursday 19th I went round to Hayley’s this afternoon to help her babysit her nieces. All we did was play Monopoly and we all lost to Hayley… badly! She bought Park Lane and Mayfair, put 3 houses on Park Lane and a hotel on Mayfair and we all landed on one of them on nearly every time round.

I also picked up my photographs while I was in the village. Some of them are from Belgium and some are from Wick. There are about 5 with Duncan on and he doesn’t look particularly nice on any of them.


That doesn’t bother me because I know he looks a bit better in real life but I only showed Hayley a couple because she might not have been quite as jealous about me having a boyfriend if she’d seen what he looked like on some of the photos! Now I couldn’t have that, could I?!

Rhian phoned this evening. She said she’d not seen much of Duncan but she seemed to think I’d phoned him already because that’s what her mum told her. Great, so Auntie S knows. It’s going to be so embarrassing if she’s told my parents and then they ask me about it. I’ve actually got no idea how they’d react though. I suspect they’d probably find amusement in making me squirm!

I hope Duncan’s not getting too teased about it. He has my sympathy, having to live up there with half of Wick knowing about us. Most of them wouldn’t go out of their way not to embarrass him either!

I went to Keria’s tonight. Emma phoned me up and said she was already there and that Gethin Turner and Anthony Wiley were on their way and did I want to come. Nothing much interesting happened. We just sat there talking. By the sounds of it, nothing much interesting happened in their lives (unless they weren’t telling me some things) while I was away.

Oh, except that Maz P dumped Keira, he said because he was going on holiday but really he’s just gone off her. Gavin’s apparently madly in love with some girl called Ali but she fancies Maz. I think Nathan is still single. Oh yeah, but I’m not!

A Level results came out today. Only a week to go until I get my GCSE results. Ooh yey, can’t wait… NOT!!!