All under the impression that I did 3 to Nathan – 2nd January 2000

Sunday 2nd I’m still longing to be in Wick and so’s Abby. Every time I hear anything to do with Scotland I feel like crying! I let Abby send a text message to Laura’s phone today seeing as they didn’t get to speak on New Year’s Eve. She said, “HI LAURA IT’S ABBY. DID U HAVE A GOOD TIME ON FRIDAY? SORRY I COULDN’T TALK 2 U OR KATE. DID U SEE ASHLEY? I REALLY REALLY WANNA B IN WICK. SPEAK SOON LUV A xxx”.

She got one back saying, “HI! WHEN R U NEXT UP? DUNCAN TRIED TO PHONE TESS BUT NO ANSWER! SEE U SOON LUV LAURA + KATE.” I don’t think Duncan did try to ring because my phone never said I’d missed a call. He can’t have tried very hard to get hold of me if he did.


I spoke to Emma this morning on the phone. She says Gavin’s party was good. I don’t know what went on with Nathan but Keira snogged his younger brother and Maz again and apparently it wasn’t a case of who Gethin snogged but more who he didn’t snog! I’m not allowed to say anything to Lizzie though.

Hayley also rang me. She seemed in a better mood than she was on Thursday! She was telling me about this Andy lad who she found at LA Bowl. She didn’t actually snog him but they’re going out tomorrow and she wants me to go too. This could be the beginning of yet more fallings out with her. I’ll end up going places with her to keep the peace until I can’t stand it any longer and then we’ll be back to square one where she thinks I’m ignoring her. I also would rather be in the company of Lizzie but Hayley’s not going to want her to come and I don’t want Lizzie thinking I’m leaving her out coz I’d much rather be out with her than Hayley.

Lizzie, Cat and Sarah are all under the impression that I did 3 [see Snogging Codeto Nathan rather than him managing all by himself, after what I said on Friday. I hope Lizzie or someone doesn’t say anything to anyone else before I can set them straight!


My love life = virtually non-existent!! – 3rd & 4th October 1999

Sunday 3rd Rhian phoned today. Other than telling me stuff like Duncan’s had his hair cut and he’s got obvious sideburns and he’s been off school because he’s had a cold, she told me something quite spooky.

She said she’d just had MADD (music and drama thing) after school one day and she and some mate needed the toilet but the pupil ones were locked up so they had to use the staff ones. She said there were loads of lockers in there and a lot of them were empty. She opened one and something fell out. She picked it up and it was a note from Grandma L about Auntie S. Not only that but if she’d found it a day later, it would’ve been exactly 23 years old! She’s kept it and it’s in her room so it’ll probably be another 23 years before it’s ever found again!!


Monday 4th I have gossip! When I got to school this morning, Lizzie said she had something to tell me but not in front of other people so we went for a walk to the garage. She pretty much came straight out with it – that she’d snogged another lad when she went to this party at LA Bowl on Saturday.

He’s called Brett and he’s only 15 but she was getting on quite well with him and the people they were with were trying to get them together, most not knowing she’s going out with Oscar. She said they got left alone round a corner and it just sort of happened.

She said she’s feeling really guilty because of Oscar but she’s been getting a bit sick of him recently because he’s got really clingy and keeps acting all suspicious of other lads round Lizzie. She said she doesn’t really regret going with [snogging] Brett as much as she might have regretted not going with him because Oscar’s unlikely to find out anyway and she’s also considering dumping him but she’s just not sure how to.

More and more people are beginning to find out because she keeps going on about it and what a slapper she’s turning into. She’s only snogged one other lad! She’s making it into a bigger deal that it really is but I think she just likes the image of having lad trouble.

Personally, I’d rather she didn’t dump Oscar just yet (although it’s tight to keep him hanging on) because that’s really my only link to Aled and if he goes I’ve not got much of a chance.

Another thing that seems to be happening is something between Sarah and Big Paul. I heard there were getting on pretty well at LA Bowl on Friday (it all seems to be happening there!) and then today he took her to McDonald’s for lunch in his car. I know she likes him (I definitely can’t see the attraction!) but he wouldn’t tell me if he liked her. Probably the fact I was pretty much demanding to know if a room full of people didn’t help to get an answer out of him but later on, Zoe told me that he said he wasn’t sure if he liked her because he’d just had sex with his ex-girlfriend last night.

Yuk! I just don’t understand. Not only does he claim to have had a girlfriend but Sarah fancies him along with Georgia Dean and Grainne Maguire. He’s totally minging – tall, fat, greasy, freckly, horrid glasses – and he’s a complete creep!

The lads who fancied Hayley are apparently going bowling again on Friday. She says she won’t chicken out of doing anything this time.

So, Lizzie’s going out with one lad and is seeing another. Sarah is likely to get into a relationship type thing with Big Creepy Paul. If Hayley ends up being brave or drunk on Friday she could get an 18 year old called Michael who has a car.

Then there’s my love life = virtually non-existent!! There is Duncan I suppose and I’m meant to be going out with him but he’s not even going to be in Wick after Thursday because he’s going to Florida for a while. Never mind!


Watching me watching him – 13th & 15th September 1999

Monday 13th On the way to school this morning, Zoe told me that she rang Craig at some point yesterday. He told her that he’s going to the cinema with his mates again on Saturday and wanted to know if she and her mates could go too. Normally it’d all be fine but it just so happens that there is a problem with this weekend which is bound to result in Hayley not speaking to me again if I don’t go about this situation carefully.

You see, there’s this 70s night on at the Sports Club also on Saturday which Hayley’s been going on about for ages. I’ve never wanted to go to it because dressing up in old clothes and having to listen to ancient music that I wasn’t around to hear the first time round with a bunch of middle-ages parents of people who I know is just not my thing. Hayley’s managed to round up a couple of people who are up for it and maybe it could be a good laugh but now there’s another offer of a night out which I’d really rather go to, I’m in a bit of an awkward situation.

If I don’t go to the cinema with Craig and those gorgeous mates of his, I could really miss out there and also if we don’t go, we could lose them to another group of girls and we couldn’t have that. But then if I don’t go to this 70s thing then Hayley’s bound to sulk a bit anyway but if she found out I was going to the cinema with them she’d be absolutely fuming! I really do not want to go to this 70s night and I’ve told her that but now I’ve got to get round to telling her where I’m going instead. Whatever I say, she won’t be happy.

Rhian phoned me on my mobile at lunch. She was with Laura and I spoke to them both. They told me to phone Duncan tonight but I haven’t done. Rhian spoke to Graham briefly and he was asking her about that letter to Dougie. She says he has a nice voice. She really wanted to speak tot Dougie but he wasn’t there.

She phoned back about 10 minutes later to tell me she’d seen Duncan. She didn’t talk to him though. That’s probably a good thing really. She phoned here at home tonight too and told me Duncan must be lying about going to Florida in October because she’s sure they’re not.


Wednesday 15th Lizzie saw Oscar’s mum today. Quite a few of us went (me, Aled, Julien Olsen, Cat and Hayley) because Lizzie didn’t want to go on her own. She was in there about 10 seconds and then we went to the bakery.

I found out that Aled either wants to do interior design or architecture when he leaves school and for his A Levels he’s going Geography (in my group), Design Technology (I think it’s called) and Art. I still think I like him but only a bit.

I think Ewan Swann still thinks I fancy him. I keep catching him looking in my direction in Biology and then his eyes flick elsewhere when he realises I’ve noticed. I think he’s watching to see if I look at him. I do though to see if he’s watching me watching him.

There’s a very nice joiner working on the computer rooms in college. Actually, there are 2 quite nice ones. One’s short and blonde but the nicest one is tall, thin, tanned, brown-haired and reminds me a lot of Chin from Wick.

Zoe phoned Craig again last night. He said they’re still going on Saturday and another mate called Andy’s going too. Something’s bound to go wrong. We told Hayley and she didn’t seem pleased that we were going without her but she’s still speaking to us.

I went on the internet tonight and Laura was on. She didn’t say much and was going to get Duncan to chat to me but he had “hills of homework” apparently. She asked me if we were going up in October and when I said I didn’t know she said, “Please come up.” I don’t know why.

I want to do kickboxing. I need to do something to keep me active and Abby and Jacqueline Robson’d do it too. Emma went last night with Maisie Jones and if she can do it, so can I.


I had various offers of a snog – 11th & 12th September 1999

Saturday 11th I went to the cinema tonight with Karen, Hayley, Cat, Freda and Zoe to see ‘Never Been Kissed’. The film was alright but after the film was even better. We were all just heading out of the cinema towards McDonald’s when I looked over at a table and saw this really fit lad craning his neck to look at us and I lip read, “They’re fucking fine!” or something to his mates. These lads ended up following us outside and asked us if we wanted to go into a film with them. We told them we were going to McD’s and they were going to come with us but changed their minds and started chatting up someone else instead.

Then Zoe, Hayley and I decided we wanted to hang round the cinema instead but the other 3 went off to McD’s anyway. The lads came over to us again and started talking to us. They are from Rainhill and are all nice looking. We found out they’re called:

  • Rob – the one who said we were fine
  • Ste – who looked like a chubbier version of Ollie Bramwell
  • Craig – who looked like a short, hunched over Charlie Wilson
  • Matthew and another one that I can’t remember the name of.

They said they were 16 I think. I had various offers of a snog. One was from Matthew then Craig told me he fancied me and asked me if I’d get off with him (but he ended up getting off with Zoe) then Ste. Ste and Matthew didn’t actually ask, someone else did it for them.

I was considering it but didn’t in the end, partly because I was all shy because I wasn’t drinking (I think they had been) and partly because I had a phone call right in the middle of them asking me. It was a message from Rhian saying something about Duncan and his mobile. I couldn’t quite make out what she was saying and all the times she could’ve mentioned Duncan it was right in the middle of my considering going with [snogging] some other lad!

I actually regret not doing it now because I’ve got nothing to talk about and they were quite fit. Zoe’s got Craig’s number and says she’ll arrange to meet him again but I doubt it’ll happen really.


Sunday 12th I went to the Trafford Centre this morning with the rest of my family in search of a pair of black trousers. I got some eventually. It was really busy because it’s the Trafford Centre’s first birthday or something so there were loads of things going on. I didn’t see anything much though except clown things on stilts which just gave me the creeps!

Rhian phoned this evening. I asked her about the message mentioning Duncan last night and she told me she was just asking if she should give him my mobile number. She said she asked him if he wanted it anyway but he said no. Oh well.

Loads of songs remind me of that holiday in Scotland, such as:

  • Better Off Alone by Alice DJ = Duncan
  • Bailamos by Enrique Iglesias = Rhian (I found out that bailamos means ‘we dance’ or something. Or so Karen says.) because she constantly played it.
  • Synth and Strings by Yomanda = Abby and Rhian because they kept making the high-pitched woofing sound in the background while it was playing.
  • La Vida Loca by Ricky Martin = Minne and Amelia because they danced to it at the talent show we did.
  • If Ya Getting Down by Five = Minnie because she kept singing and dancing to it.
  • Back Here by BB Mak = Duncan. I’m not really sure why but I was singing it all holiday and some of the words could be from his point of view.
  • Everybody but Backstreet Boys = Rhian, Abby and I dancing to it.

There are others but I can’t think right now what they are.

I’ve just been watching that ‘Sex, Chips + Rock n Roll’ on TV. That Joe McFadden’s pretty gorgeous!


I think I like Aled – 9th & 10th September 1999

Thursday 9th I had Geography period 1 and 2 today and then that was my lessons for Thursday done with. It’s great! I could’ve gone home but instead Freda, Rani, Lena and I got the bus to the drive through McDonald’s in Warrington. We had to come back for 1:15pm because Lena had a Food Tech lesson.

For the rest of the afternoon I just sat about upstairs in the college. In period 4 there were quite a few others who were on free periods like Emma who was telling me that Robert Osborne likes her and Dominic Walters likes Suzanna.

Period 5 was a bit quieter. There was me, Georgia, Lena, Freda and Rani, some caretaker type bloke called Wayne and Aled. Aled was being nice to me again but without holding my hand!

Rhian phoned tonight. She’s fallen out with Laura Morgan who sounds like she’s being a right 2-faced bitch. (Hayley was still being a bit off with me today.) Laura’s having a birthday sleepover on Saturday but Rhian’s got something on with her drama group but she could go later but Laura doesn’t seem to want her to for some reason. She’s also threatening to tell Gillian L that Rhian’s been slagging her off. If she does, that’ll be the end of Rhian’s face. Best friends shouldn’t do that. I thought Hayley was being bad enough too.


Friday 10th When I got in from school today I saw this on my desk. ↓


I’m so pleased he’s finally got round to writing! I pretty much guessed what it was when I saw the envelope, other than the fact there’s a Scottish stamp on the front. I don’t really know anyone else who’d write to me and I didn’t recognise the writing. It’s only a short letter but it’s better than nothing.

I forgot about Duncan’s DJ-ing. I remembered he’d told me once that he did it for the hospital radio or something. I wish I could read his e-mail address. I’ve worked out what most of it is but I don’t know what that 2nd number or letter is. Never mind, I’ll just have to write back again.

I’m a bit disappointed, actually, really disappointed that I might not get to see him in October unless he thinks my hols are at the same time as his. It’d be okay if he’s back from Florida for school because that’s when I’ll be going up. Although, there’s no guarantee I’ll be able to anyway.

I got my exam scripts back from school today because they’re using our school to trial it on. I worked out what percentages I got:

Science (paper 4) = 70/120 = 58%
Science (paper 5) = 77/120 = 64% (I think these are right.)
Geography = 101/124 = 81%
Business Studies = 80/127 = 63% (I’ve not got one Business paper back.)
Food Tech = 99/130 = 76%
French reading = 31/45 = 69%
French writing = 17/42 = 40%
French listening = 21/40 = 52%
P.E. = 74/120 = 62%
Maths (paper 3) = 71/100 = 71%
Maths (paper 4) = 74/100 = 74%

Some of them look pretty crap as a percentage but stuff like coursework must have improved the overall mark.

I think I like Aled. Well, actually I’m not sure but every time he’s talking to another girl or is complementing one, I get ever so slightly jealous. I keep seeing him on his bike in the morning too before school but he’s always gone past it so I don’t know where he’s going. I’ll have to find out somehow.


Assault and abduction of the pig – 5th September 1999

Sunday 5th I went to Freda’s party last night. It was quite good apart from the fact that Hayley went in a total mood with me… again!

Somebody’s birthday present to Hayley was this walking, grunting toy pig from Boots and at one point she gave it to me to look after. Everyone in the room was telling me to put it on the floor and switch it on so I did but then Aled Brownlee whacked it one with a Lambrusco bottle. The compartment for the batteries broke and came flying out so he picked it up and ran off with it.

Nobody had a clue what he’d done with it and as soon as Hayley found out it was missing, she decided it must be my fault. So, she kept ignoring and making nasty little comments, like when I asked her if she was going to open her champagne she replied, “Well, I won’t be sharing it with you if I do.” Also, when I was sprawled across a whole sofa and I was jokingly not letting Cat sit down, she said loudly, “See Cat, as selfish as ever.” Bitch! I’m getting sick of her doing this at parties.

Cat told me, after Hayley’d found the pig and pissed of home at about 11:00pm, that she’d also been annoyed with me because I always say before parties that I’ll stick with her but once I get there I never do. Well, to start with I didn’t say I’d stick with her and, anyway, can you blame me for not doing?! She’s no fun whatsoever. All she does is moan and whinge and sulk or sit in front of the computer trying to get cybersex! I just went and found people who were being less miserable and much livelier.

Even after Bridget Linehan (who’d been witness to the assault and abduction of the pig) told her it wasn’t my fault it’d gone missing, I didn’t hear an apology. In fact, she still wouldn’t speak to me. It’ll be like this for ages now.

After I’d decided to sod Hayley, I just hung about with Lizzie, Oscar Price and Aled. Aled was being really nice to me and he kept getting me drinks and letting me sit down where he’d been sat and stuff. When he’d gone out of the room after sitting on the arm of the chair I was on and talking to me, Oscar told me that he’d been trying to chat me up.

I hadn’t thought about it until then but I realise that, as far as I knew, I was just about the only one he hadn’t been taking the piss out of. Then when he came back, he started touching my hand while he was talking to me and we ended up holding hands.

But then Freda’s dad started clearing the lads out and giving them lifts home but Aled and Oscar didn’t want to leave so they got out of the window and were over the fence before Freda’s dad piled them into the car.

When we began clearing up, Lizzie and I sneaked out to try and find them. We did and just hung around for a while until about 1:00am when we thought her dad’d be in bed. We were just sat on a bench outside The Smithy pub, Lizzie + Oscar holding hands and me + Aled holding hands until we decided to go back.

While we were walking, Aled had his arm round my waist instead so I tried not to be left alone with him because I didn’t want to snog him

  1. because of Duncan so I didn’t want him to end up asking me out.
  2. because I might have regretted it when people were taking the piss on Monday.
  3. because most people think he’s a knob and I don’t want everyone asking “Why?” all the time.

I didn’t end up having to but probably if the Duncan factor didn’t exist I would’ve done, although I’m not sure I’d feel guilty anymore because he’s not keeping in touch and he probably wouldn’t find out anyway.

We arrived back at Freda’s but they’d locked the door and were all upstairs so I had to climb through a window to let the others in. For the rest of the night we hardly slept other than about 10 minutes and just watched TV. I was sat on a sofa with Aled and he either held my hand, had his hand on my leg or was rubbing my arm. It was quite nice actually and he was constantly making me laugh with his piss taking and sarcastic comments. He was kissing my hand a bit at one point but that was it thank goodness.

I hope he doesn’t decide he really does like me and ask me out or something because I don’t like saying no. I’d have to because too many people here know about Duncan and, anyway, even though I like Aled, I don’t like him enough. It’d be too embarrassing and all because of other people’s opinions about him. That shouldn’t matter but it does!

My mum ended up giving Aled and Oscar a lift back to their village and when I got in I went to bed.

I’ve not heard from Hayley today which is a bad sign because I can’t be doing with the hassle of falling out with her. Rhian phoned though. Duncan’s apparently told Laura that he’s written to me, e-mailed me and he tried to phone on Saturday but couldn’t get through. I think he’s lying because the e-mail at least would’ve reached here by now and there isn’t one from him. Laura also thinks he only said “no” when she asked if he was going to write just because he was showing off or something.

Rhian said that Melanie has beaten up Leanne and Frances really badly and she might get expelled from school and get send to some sort of home in Inverness. Rhian thinks it’s funny. Could be!


“I don’t do geeks!” – 31st August & 1st September 1999

Tuesday 31st I went to Warrington with Hayley today just to get a few more bits for school. I bought a Bang on the Door pencil tin with ‘Students’ on the front and load of other little pictures inside, some of which I’ve labelled. I also got a notepad with a flowery hologram thing for the cover, more pens, rubbers and a blue cardigan thing from Topshop.

My pencil tin and it’s drawings inside is likely to get scratched and scribbled on so I’ll just write down what I put by some pictures.



That’s it for now. I’ve actually scratched in the 1st 5 but the other 3 I’m only considering so I just pencilled them in. There are loads of other ones I could put names to but I’ve not got round to doing it yet. The little pictures are so cool and I could be really insulting to people with some of them!

  • I put me and Duncan with the ‘kiss’ picture for obvious reasons.
  • Greg to the ‘cutie’ one because he’s small and Rhian says he’s cute (I can see what she means).
  • Abby and Ashley are ‘love’ but only because she made me put that and she says she doesn’t care that he has a small ponytail. (I added the sparkle to the shoes to make them look more like his shining white trainers!)
  • I put Stitch to ‘away with the fairies’ because he’s a bit like that. I think his real name is Stephen McDonald but I could be wrong and getting him confused with the Coronation Street character!
  • I put Ben McFarlane as the ‘fit’ picture because, well, he’s fit!
  • I’ll probably put David T with ‘anorak’ because the picture has ears that stick out like his and he’s a bit sad, I reckon.
  • Hayley with ‘stressed out’ because that’s what she usually is about something.
  • My cousin Tom with ‘rascal’ because he can be one but a sweet one!


Wednesday 1st Mum went back to work today and we go back to school/college tomorrow.

Auntie G called round briefly on her way to Grandma S’s from London. She’s staying for about a week I think.

Rhian phoned tonight. She had no news from Duncan and when I asked her if she’d even spoken to him, she replied, “I don’t do geeks!” I commented on Greg being a geek and she hung up! I think she was joking and expected me to ring back but I couldn’t be bothered. She did say she’d asked Duncan if he was going to write to me and he said no but she could just be saying that to shut me up, he could’ve just been saying that to shut her up or he could’ve said it and meant it.

Abby got loads of info about Ashley though because Rhian’s mate is a friend of his family and used to fancy him too.

  • His full name is Ashley Hugh Ewart.
  • He’s 15 (born in 1984).
  • He lives at on Wells Street in Wick.
  • He buys his trainers from Sports Connection.
  • He likes footy and fighting films.
  • He uses Imperial Leather and Adidas deodorant.
  • He wears Hugo Boss and Tommy Hilfiger.
  • He’s got a Playstation.
  • He plays for Wick Groats.
  • He trains with Aberdeen and Ross County.
  • He’s got blue wallpaper in his room.
  • He supports Rangers.
  • He hangs round with Tartan Hat Boy, 2 Davids, Dunny and Pip (a.k.a. Greg! Ha, ha, ha!!!)
  • He wears all the big names e.g. Nike, Adidas, Reebok.
  • His mum has a red Mercedes with registration B18 EWT.
  • He’s got a sister who’s 11 and likes footy too.
  • He coaches the Wick High School footy team.
  • He used to go to the Baptist church when he was little.

That’s about it. [Not really sure why I would write all that down unless a) my sister asked me to or b) I actually fancied him a bit myself. Probably b).) Why can’t somebody tell me that much about bloody Duncan and then reassure me that he still likes me?!


P.S. I don’t want to go to school tomorrow.

P.P.S. P.T.O. to see 2 more cards that I got. →



Adam has a ‘new love’ – 30th August 1999

Monday 30th Again, I’ve not really done a lot today. I went on the internet to help Abby with her Art work (that’s how bored I was!) and I had a quick chat with a lad called Barney Greer. I used to talk to his mate Adam loads and we even phoned and wrote to each other. We did arrange to meet up in June at Alton Towers but he couldn’t make it in the end. Pretty soon after that we kind of lost touch. I mailed him a few times but he didn’t reply.

Anyway, I also used to talk to Barney a bit and Adam’s mate Ronan but it was Barney who I usually got Adam-related information out of. Today we were just catching up because we’ve not spoken for ages either. He told me he got 4 As, 5 Bs and 3 Cs (I think) in his exams and that he’d been on holiday to Crete with Ronan.

I managed to turn the conversation round onto my holiday so I could tell him all about Duncan. I told Barney in hope that it’d get back to Adam because he probably thinks I miss talking to him or something. Barney then told me that Adam has a ‘new love’ from Manchester who’s 17 and he met her on holiday and Barney’s been told she’s really nice.

I’m ashamed to say I got a slight hint of jealousy when I was told that piece of information but I keep remembering what an ugly creep he really is! Anyhow, I’ve got my own lad now, even though I did leave him behind in Scotland so with any luck, Adam’ll get just a little bit jealous too if he gets to hear about it!

I keep on thinking about Scotland and Duncan and everyone else and what they might be doing. I really want Duncan to make some sort of effort to contact me but I don’t think it’s going to happen. I don’t know whether he’s trying to forget me, he fancies someone else, he only ever wanted a bit of experience with a girl and he doesn’t really care I’ve gone, or what.

It’s really annoying because I’ve got no way of finding out. Rhian’s absolutely hopeless when it comes to getting and telling information so she’s no use. I’ve made the effort to keep in touch by writing and e-mailing him but I’ve not had replies from either. I’m pretty fed up to be honest. It’d be better if I just wasn’t bothered but I bloody well am!

Abby’s found out more info on Ashley. She says he plays for a footy team called ‘The Groats’ or something with Cal Brown. That’s all though.


I kept waffling on about him – 28th August 1999

Saturday 29th Not a lot happened during the day, I just played about with my mobile phone. This evening though, Mum and Dad went out to Louise B’s wedding do so Abby had her friends round and Hayley came too. We just talked, went on the internet, played Pictionary and The Game of Life, and at one point decided to ring Rhian. She wasn’t at home, she was at Laura’s so Abby phoned there.

Duncan answered. He told Abby they weren’t there but then I decided I might as well speak to him. I wish I hadn’t now. I was just asking where Rhian was and stuff and he told me they were over the road then Hayley decided she wanted to speak and grabbed the phone off me. She started saying how I kept waffling on about him and how I started whining every time I saw the name Duncan on TV and stuff.

She told me afterwards that he sounded pleased but I tend not to believe much that Hayley tells me. She was probably just trying to avoid trouble with me.

I got the phone back and told him to ignore her and apologised for her and he said something about her being crazy. Then I mentioned I had a mobile phone now and asked if he wanted the number. He said, “Not just now, I’m just in the middle of something actually” or summit. I apologised and we said goodbye.

It really sounded like he was trying to get rid of me. That’s why I regretted speaking. He didn’t actually ask to speak to me either. Oh, but I still really like him and miss him so much.

I suppose h e could’ve been doing homework or something because he said he’d been busy with it when I said how I hadn’t heard from him for a while. Fair enough. I should’ve asked him what he was doing really, just to keep my mind at ease.

Rhian never phoned back either. I could’ve found out off her what he was doing otherwise.


I’ve probably failed them all – 25th August 1999

Wednesday 25th I met up with Keira, Emma, Patrick Campbell, Dougie and Stuart Hobbs at Warrington Bus Station this morning ready to go on a ‘mystery tour’ because we didn’t know where we were going to go. We were just going to jump on a train and go somewhere. I was actually late because I got the 10:10 bus instead of the 9:40 bus and, when Emma didn’t get on in her village, I got off, found a phone box and tried to phone Emma to see where she was but it was engaged so I stated walking home.

Mum drove past, stopped, picked me up and said they’d phoned saying they were waiting for me so she gave me a lift there. I ran to the bus station and eventually found them all, apologised, they laughed at me and we made our way to Warrington Central station. We looked down the list of places to go and chose Liverpool. We got on a train and went.

All we really did all day was wander round the Albert Dock, wander round the main shopping area and sit in McDonald’s, flicking a carton of tomato ketchup across the table to each other until it burst all over Stuart and Dougie.

We got this photo taken in a booth: (I am on it but very blurred!)


When we got bored of Liverpool, we came back to Warrington and went in McDonald’s. Then Dougie left because he had to go to work at that tennis centre thing so the rest of us went back to the bus station. The lads went home but Emma and I went back to Keira’s house for a bit.

The other 2 discussed Robert a lot and what Keira should find out for Emma (such as if he likes her) and I kind of groaned when ‘Better Off Alone’ came on the radio. They asked me why so I told them about Duncan although I didn’t go into too much details on what happened because I could feel myself going red.

I got in this evening and phoned Rhian to tell her that I gave the letter to Dougie today. (She wasn’t in but she rang back later.) I gave it to him at the bus station when I arrived and he took his time reading it. He wouldn’t show us so I think he took it seriously! He kept getting it out and reading it again all day. Then he started asking me questions about Rhian such as, “How old is she?” and “What does she look like?” I think I’ll have to show him a photo sometime.

Just before he went to work, I asked him if he had any messages for her and he said something like, “Tell her that as you’re giving her this message, I’m on my way up to Scotland so she’d better brace herself!” I think I’ve made his head enlarge rather considerably!

I get my GCSE exam results back tomorrow. I’m worried now. I was okay until about 9:00pm and then I got bored and began worrying. These are my predictions for how I’ve done:

English – C (if I’m lucky!)
Maths – D
Science – Fail
French – Fail
Geography – D
Food Tech and Business – Fail
P.E. – D
Art – C (if I’m lucky!)

I think that’s all the subjects. I might be pushing my luck a bit by saying I’ve got Cs and Ds. In reality, I’ve probably failed them all. Oh well, looks like I’ll be seeking employment as a bag packer in Tesco or something.

I’m really nervous now. I can see myself tomorrow finding out my results and being so bloody annoyed with myself because I know now I could’ve done better than I have. All the people around me will be satisfied at least because all my friends are clever. I’m not thick but when it came to the exams, I knew I’d not got a chance of getting the grades I should. I’d be happy if I got one A but I won’t have done. I don’t want to fail or get any Ds either but I’m bound to. I don’t think I’ll be getting too much sleep tonight.

These are my train tickets from today. I thought I may as well just stick them in. ↓


(I lied and said I was 15 to get half fare!)

I almost forgot, Rhian told me on the phone that she’d told Duncan he had to write to me and he said “Alright then” or something. I hope he does write back, I still really miss him. Rhian also said she’d got photos of Chin, Sanders (but he was hiding) and Ashley Ewart’s back so she’ll send them when she’s done more I think.

I’ll go away and panic now! AAARRGGHHH!!!