Puffing and blowing and waving about – 4th March 2001

Sunday 4th
4 weeks + 4 days to go!

I had another driving lesson this morning. My instructor kept saying I was good seeing as I’ve only had 3 lessons and that we got through quite a lot again today. I drove from my house to somewhere in Warrington where there was a housing estate so I could learn how to slow down and turn and stuff. I made a few more mistakes than before cos I’ve had more to concentrate on today and it’s getting more complicated. I thought it went quite well though.

I drove home again but stalled trying to turn up the lane. I got a bit flustered cos there was a big van behind me. My instructor told me afterwards that the men in it had been puffing and blowing and waving about cos they’d been annoyed at having to wait for me to start up again. He told me to ignore people like that and he’s right but it did piss me off a bit.

Then when I got in, Dad started telling me not to be surprised if it all starts to go wrong in the 5th or 6th lesson when it starts getting more complicated. He did say it’d improve again but it put me off a bit cos I don’t want it to go wrong. I ended up getting a bit upset but then got really upset when I got told I was being pathetic and over-reacting to what Dad said. Mum then said I’ve got to stop over-reacting about stuff such as my legs and failing Biology exams when all I really wanted was reassurance.

So, I got even more upset to the point where I couldn’t breathe properly! 😦 I just wanted to explain that I can’t help worrying and when people get annoyed with me it make me worse. I just need to tell people things sometimes. I did calm down eventually and apologised for being ‘pathetic’ and I felt much better after having a good cry!

Mid-upset, I wrote down what was going through my mind, seeing as no-one seemed to be listening! →

04-03-01 List of worries.jpg

I really don’t know what was up with me cos I don’t get into that sort of state very often. I think it’s just cos I’ve had a bit of a horrid week, what with exams and starting to worry about my legs, and Jake being away and not ringing me on time and stuff. Maybe it was cos my period’s due in a couple of days too! I think what Dad said just hit a nerve cos I did bother a bit today that my lesson didn’t go as well as it could’ve done!

Jake phoned at 4:25 pm today. He kept saying he wants to come home. Good! It hadn’t snowed there yet so maybe it’ll all melt! 🙂 We were trying to think of somewhere he could get a job when he gets back, just in case his dad makes him but everywhere I suggested he came up with a reason not to work there. He doesn’t want a job, that’s why! I can’t say I blame him cos I don’t either!

We talked about Barcelona too and he mentioned that even if we have to get up for breakfast, we can always go back to bed for a bit afterwards! 🙂


Today’s emails →

04-03-01 Jake email04-03-01 Tess email

I didn’t zig-zag about or anything – 18th February 2001

Sunday 18th
6 weeks + 4 days to go!

I had my 2nd driving lesson this morning. It was really good again! My instructor told me that we’d covered a lot and that I was very good considering it was only my 2nd lesson 🙂 It took me a few minutes to get going cos he wasn’t guiding me with the basics as much but after I got used to the car again, I was fine.

I did mount the curb while turning a corner but it was either that or risk hitting a van that was parked right on the corner! I stalled a couple of times again too but one was my instructor’s fault cos he changed gear and didn’t warn me! He admitted it wasn’t my fault too.

I drove up Shawhead Lane, through Cat’s village and then around the outskirts of Warrington, I think. I did an emergency stop and I didn’t stall or skid so I was told it was well done!

I’ve decided I don’t like roundabouts though. They’re too complicated!

Ooh! I reversed as well but only in a straight line. My instructor said that was good too cos I didn’t zig-zag about or anything. 🙂 I’ve not got a lesson next week though so in 2 weeks’ time I’ll probably have forgotten everything!

I was just beginning to think Jake wasn’t going to phone tonight when he did at about 5pm. He’d had trouble finding/using a phonecard or something but at least he phoned. It wasn’t a long call, he just told me how Jessie’s very popular!


Today’s emails →

18-02-01 Jake email18-02-01 Tess email