You just fall in love with him  – 1st & 2nd February 1998

Sunday 1st Sorry, it’s late. This will only be short.

The film I went to see, Titanic = brilliant, sad, moving music. Tell you more another time.

[Let my obsession with Titanic (well, Leo DiCaprio) commence!]


Monday 2nd Mr H, an I.T. teacher at school, died yesterday. He’s had stomach cancer since, well, a while but he found out in December. Mrs K was telling us how ill he was on the way to Runcorn so I was half expecting him to die but not so soon. All the teachers, especially Mrs N who was his mate, were really upset.

Titanic yesterday was absolutely brilliant. I can’t describe it. It was just so realistic which I think is why it was so sad because it makes you think about what all those people must have been going through. Plus Leo DiCaprio was in it and he is just so gorgeous.

Near the end, he dies and he sinks under the water coz the girl, Rose (Kate Winslet) lets go of him. It’s so sad. You just fall in love with him, especially as Jack in this film coz he was lovely.

Uh, you’ll have to see it, I just can’t find the words.

February 1998 - Titanic J&R

Also, when all the poorer people are partying, there’s a tune, like a jig, that my Uncle R plays with his band. I’m gonna have to borrow the soundtrack off Freda coz there’s this lovely but sad music that keeps playing.

According to Becky the Year 9, Dougie and his girlfriend might have fallen out. Becky even thought they might have split up. [Hallelujah!] Becky also said it was his birthday today but I’m not so sure.

Hold on, I’ll check in my previous diary. [Where I kept all my stalker notes.]

Oh, I can’t find it, never mind.

Dougie’s got a new coat. It’s bright red and I can’t get used to it!

I’m starting to like Ferny now. I wonder how long that’ll last.


Lizzie bleated like a sheep – 29th – 31st January 1998

Thursday 29th Apparently Ralph got thumped in the gob this morning by Jez and has now got 2 wobbly front teeth. Ralph did call him a Yorkshire sheep though. I dunno if it’s true though coz Ralph told Emma and she told me.

I went skiing in Runcorn again tonight. None of Ralph and Freddie’s lot went. I went on the big slope and went right to the top twice. I fell over one time on the ski lift and nearly for a 2nd time when one of the instructors was trying to push me over.

It was the 2nd night for Parents Evening and Business was a good report from Mrs R, Food was a good report from Mrs K and Maths was ok but it shocked Mum and Dad when (for once) they got told I talked too much to Hayley!


Friday 30th I found out today that Ralph hit Jez back 3 times. I didn’t think he had it in him. I wanted to see that coz I’m not sure I can believe it otherwise!

Lizzie got asked out by Howard Johnson today. She really does attract pricks. For once though so said no.

Hayley said Ralph’s ignoring her now. She thinks it’s because Lena Hall told him that Hayley doesn’t like him. He’s probably embarrassed and disappointed. Hayley feels awful now coz before he always said hi to her.

Lizzie was tight to Jez as well today. Emma, Lizzie and I walked past him at lunch and as he went past, Lizzie bleated like a sheep. Hopefully he didn’t hear her.

Whenever we walk past that lot of lads, Dougie seems to be the only one who actually speaks to us. At lunch, Ralph and Freddie all ignored us but Dougie stopped and talked. Then they all went off and left him. He was only saying about that letter yesterday, sorry Wednesday, but at least he says summit, not like the other miserable gits. Mind you, we don’t’ stop and talk to them either so we can’t really complain.

Emma reckons Dougie’s just polite. I think he’s just got more to talk about with us than the rest of ‘em.

By the way, whenever I say “that lot” I usually mean Ralph, Freddie, Dougie, Jez, Ferny etc and when I say “us lot” or “we” I usually mean me, Emma and our mates. That’s just for future reference.

I found out today that Ferny’s dad has the same name as my dad. Just thought I’d mention it.


Saturday 31st It’s all footy results I’m writing about today and bloody bad ones at that.

To start with, Man Utd lost 1-0 to Leicester City. How? Why? They can win against all these great European teams but can’t beat the likes of teams like Leicester bleeding City! I’ve got nothing more to say on that match except we were lucky that it was 0-0 to Liverpool and Blackburn coz they’re the biggest threats at the moment. That leave us 4 points clear at the top.

The other match which affected our family was the Bolton v Coventry one. Bolton lost 5-1. My dad wasn’t pleased at all and keeps saying that should sack Colin Todd. He’s probably right. Dad ended up leaving the Reebok Stadium 10 mins before the end coz he was that embarrassed. Mind you, it wasn’t quite as bad as he thought coz he thought it was 6-1 until he checked on Teletext.


I’m trying not to let myself like Jez – 28th January 1998

Wednesday 28th Freda was telling me and Emma at lunch about some letter on the wall of their French room that Dougie had written and signed off with Emma’s name. We didn’t believe her so we thought we’d go up and see.

They were the same letters that we had to make up for a homework once. You had to pretend that you worked for a company called Microscene and you had to write to somebody called Mr Vincent. Dougie’s letter was summit like this:-

January 1998 - French letter

It was signed ‘La secrataire du M. Douglas, Mme E. Thornley’. She wasn’t very pleased at all.

I had Geography after lunch and I was under strict instructions from Mme. E. Thornley to find out why he’d used her name. I asked him and he said, “It just seemed like a good idea at the time. It’s been up there for ages.”

Emma thought he’d done it coz it was to Mr Vincent [The surname of a boy she’d fancied once.] as though he was trying to make it look like she was writing letters to him but I don’t think that was the reason.

Emma said Ralph got into a bit of a fight with Jim Brackenhurst in Food. I think they were just pushing each other about a bit, nothing serious.

I’m trying not to let myself like Jez now. He keeps smiling at me and, in Geography, Mrs C laughed at summit he’d written and he was smiling at me in an embarrassed sort of way. I don’t think he fancies me coz he keeps calling other people Tess. Like Sarah and Rachael Hollins. Cheers Jez! NOT!


I wanna know if I’ve got competition! – 21th January 1998

Wednesday 21st I think Ralph fancies Hayley coz at last break I went up to the Home Ec. rooms coz they’d been cooking and I asked him if he fancied Hayley coz she thinks he does. [Coz I totally cared coz I massively fancied him myself.]

He didn’t actually say a straight yes or no, he said, “I think she’s nice. Whadda you think?” How am I supposed to bloody well know whether he fancies Hayley or not?

I said some stupid things whilst I was there which I’m beginning to regret now. I think he asked me why I wanted to know or summit coz I found myself saying, “Coz I wanna know if I’ve got competition!”

That was stupid. Very stupid. I dunno if he took me seriously or not though. Emma reckons he’s probably gone off trying to decide whether or not I was being serious or taking the piss. To be honest, I’m not sure he can think that hard! As far as I know, he’s only really good at cooking and riding his bike. Poor lad, I s’pose it’s not his fault!

Lizzie and I both went into a really daft mood in Geography and Dougie permanently thought we were talking and giggling at him. Paranoid, that’s what he is! We were (most of the time) talking about him and taking the mick out of Lizzie’s sisters thinking he’s posh and the way he rubs his forehead when he thinks. I wonder if he still thinks I’m quiet!

Oh yeah, I also asked Ralph who Freddie fancies. It’s not Hayley or Emma according to him. Not that Freddie would ever tell Ralph anyway.

Hmmm, I’ve never actually thought about who Freddie fancies. [I hoped it was me.] I’ll have to find that out somehow. I have my ways!

January 1998 - Heartbreak bye

Dougie asked where I was. Twice. – 17th January 1998

Saturday 17th I phoned Emma this morning. I wasn’t as bothered about it as I was last night so I thought I’d give her a chance to explain. Plus I was bored! She said she thought I knew she was going. She told me what had happened and said I hadn’t missed much except they all nearly got twatted in McDonald’s by these lads causing trouble.

She also said Dougie asked where I was. Twice. The 1st time, he said, “Why hasn’t Tess come?” Emma told him I couldn’t be bothered and the 2nd time he said, “Where’s Tess again?”

She then told me he said I was “quite quiet really” and that Ed agreed with him. Bastards! [I don’t know why I was always so offended at being called quiet. I was.] She said to them that I wasn’t and they just didn’t know me properly. She said I got off lightly and said they were slagging Hayley off and saying she was annoying. They can’t talk! Especially Ed and Dougie’s just boring usually.

Emma said Dougie’s girlfriend and her mates were being bitches and were off fagging it [smoking] most of the time.

That’s really put me off Dougie now. I never liked Ed to start with though so there’s not much difference there! [Ed is one of the few school people that I’ve told about If Destroyed Still True. Soz Ed! If you’re reading this, I like you nowadays, I promise!]

I’ll have to concentrate on Ralph and Freddie now!


Here’s the order of fitness that I think they go in – 14th January 1998

Wednesday 14th WOAH! That assembly was so funny. It started off with Blind Date. There was Carly Jennings as Cilla Black, Schoey as the bloke who had to pick a girl and the girls were Gemma Crowther being a posh snob from Cambridge, Pamela Rhodes being a slapper from Essex and Grace Langley being a hardcore from Manchester. It was good but I really wanted the stripper lads to come on.

Mr P then came on and introduced The Full Monty by telling us about how stereotyping isn’t always correct and then he told is about the film and said that there were all different types of blokes in it, “a fat one, a thin one and a tall lanky one”. For the last description, everyone laughed coz we all thought of Ralph so he added “with red hair” then looked behind the curtain and said, “Ralph?!”

Finally it started and Hot Chocolate (I Believe In Miracles) came on and the five of ‘em started dancing. Dougie looked dead serious but the rest were enjoying it, I think. They stripped to their boxers which was further than we thought we’d go! [It seems strange even that was allowed!]

It surprised me how fit they all actually were. Here’s the order of fitness that I think they go in:-

1 – Dougie – Absolutely gorgeous! Shame about the dancing!

7 Dougie

2 – Ferny – Skinny but with a six-pack!

8 Will

3 – Ralph – Not bad. Bit of a six-pack but very white!

9 Ralph

4 – Freddie – Not quite as thin. Chubbier but tanned!

10 Freddie

5 – Graham – Couldn’t see him. Too small!

11 Graham

As we walked out of the Drama Studio they were all stood by the door. I said, “Very good” and Freddie and Dougie thanked me. I wanted to comment on their boxers but there were teachers about!

Throughout the day people kept yelling, “Oi, get your kit off!” to ‘em all. They’re never gonna hear the end of it!

In the Home Ec. Room at lunch, I was stood staring at a bag of flour coz I was knackered after running up and down the wing in hockey. They Ralph said, “You’re imagining me naked, aren’t you?!” I just said a sarky yes.

Dougie’s getting full of himself now coz everyone keeps telling him how fit he is. It doesn’t suit him being too big-headed. He even flashed me and Lizzie his boxers in Geography to show us that they were blue with white stars on. We know already. We were paying very careful attention in assembly!


[If you’re reading this and know me, PLEASE don’t tell these lads that I not only ranked them in order of fitness but also drew them. In detail. 

At least I drew them clothed.]

We’ll slash his tyres – 7th & 9th January 1998

Wednesday 7th Mrs C’s shifted the desks about so Lizzie and I aren’t sitting in front of Dougie and Neil K. We’re still near them but it’s not as easy to turn round and talk to them. Dougie sounded quite disappointed actually.  He said, “Ah, we can’t talk to you anymore.”

Emma and Sarah tried to get my £1 back off Ralph but the 1st time they mentioned it he started singing Gala ‘Free From Desire’. The 2nd time he told them he only had 20p.


P.S. Hockey was good actually. We did it indoors too and I didn’t bother cleaning my trainers last night so I was squelching and dropping mud all round the sports hall!

January 1998 - Hockey

Friday 9th I tried to get my quid back today. I caught him scrambling round looking for his bag amongst a load that had been dumped on the floor. It was said like this:-

T: Ralph, you owe me a quid.
R: No I don’t.
T: Yeah you do. Just think, you could have been left at Warrington Bus Station but I…
R: Yeah ok. I’ll give it you back sometime, like next year.
T: No, you’ll give it me on Monday or I’ll have your bike.

January 1998 - Money

It’s a bit daft of him to get on the wrong side of people when everyone know which is his bike. Emma’s gonna tell him we’ll slash his tyres if I don’t get my money back! [Ha! Yeah right.]


January 1998 - Drip