I should’ve kept my gob shut – 6th November 2001

Tuesday 6th  I felt very rough this morning and I was even sick which doesn’t happen to me very often. It must’ve been all that mingin’ vodka. Urrgghh!!

I missed my Ecology lecture first thing and just went to the Maths test instead. If I completely fail it, I won’t be surprised!

Jen managed to make it in too. She said that bloke was still in the room this morning but she can’t really remember what happened. She reckons she was too pissed to do much. Probably!

Kevin got all confused after what I said last night and thought I wanted to get back together. I knew I should’ve kept my gob shut! I explained to him that I don’t want to get back together yet because I don’t want to be tied down to a boyfriend when I haven’t settled in properly yet. I still want to make friends and stuff but that’s less likely to happen if he’s always around. I feel like I should go out with him even though I’d rather go out with my flatmates. When I was with Jake, there was a point when my mates got a bit pissed off cos I was always with him. I don’t want that to happen here cos I don’t want to annoy people before they even know me properly.

What I didn’t mention to Kevin was that I also quite like Ben. All of what I said was true but I could hardly tell him that bit. Kevin also irritates me quite often when he thinks he knows everything, constantly talks about himself and tries to help me but actually makes me feel stupid and gives me the impression that he doesn’t think I’m capable of sorting myself out. I know he doesn’t mean to be like that but I really can’t stand it sometimes.

On the phone he mentioned he knew a few people who like me. I eventually managed to get him to tell me. He reckons Archie fancies me cos he told Kevin that if he wasn’t with me then he’d go for me himself. Ben also apparently told Rick (who told Kevin) that he still likes me. I don’t know how long ago that was but it was after Freshers’ Week anyway. Quite pleased about that but Ben doesn’t act like he’s interested so what can I do? It’d be cruel to Kevin anyway. Even though I’ve dumped him, it’s not like I can do much with other lads anyway. Well, not without feeling (and being) like a complete bitch!

Bye!

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