Wednesday 31st I tried to dump Kevin tonight but failed. When I got back from the Arbar I mentioned to him that I wasn’t sure it was a good idea being together when we’re on the same course. I chickened out of doing it though when he started being all nice and he managed to talk me round saying how he doesn’t intend on us splitting up but if we did, he wouldn’t make it a problem. I had quite a lot to drink tonight anyway so I wasn’t exactly in the best frame of mind when it came to making decisions like that.
I think I decided to do it cos various lad stuff happened or was said and I kind of felt like I was missing chances with other people cos I’m with Kevin. If I hadn’t been going out with Jake for a year and a half before I got here then I’d probably love having a proper boyfriend but I was quite enjoying being single for a bit. The thing is though, I’m worried that if I do break up with Kevin then I won’t get another chance with a nice lad and I’ll just end up with bastards, mingers or no-one at all.
Ugh! I don’t know what to do. The other problem tonight was that while I was with Kevin, my flatmates etc. were off having fun and I felt a bit left out cos I think they’re kind of forgetting about me cos they assume I’m always out with Kevin and stuff. I’ll just have to see what happens, I suppose.
Anyway, I still had a good night. It was a Halloween thing on the Arbar so there were loads of people dressed up.
I had a bottle of red nail varnish in my bag so I went round attacking various lads with it. I got so many of them! A lot refused to let me paint their nails at first but I managed to persuade most of them in the end.
The lad stuff that happened/was said was as follows:
- Archie said Kevin’s “one lucky son of a bitch” to have me.
- Kevin said he knows!
- Kevin said Ben and Rick were decided in Freshers’ Week which girls were nicest off our course and Ben picked me. That’s why he was asking if Abby looked like me cos he hoped she would do.
- When I’d finished painting Gavin’s (a chef [so he says] from Boothroyd Block C) nails, I turned round and saw him pulling a sad face to his mate when I stopped talking to him and left. However that could just have been cos he was sat on his own pretty much. It looked promising though.
- Some bloke said to put lipstick on his mate as well as nail varnish. I didn’t understand at first until he explained he meant “snog him”. I didn’t.
I bet I sound really big headed now. I’m just not used to this, that’s all. I never really got noticed before except by the odd lad who was usually a bit strange. Then when I was with Jake, everyone know so nobody tried anything. It’s weird!