Tuesday 23^rd I knew things between Leon and me wouldn’t last the way they were. It was all too good to be true.

The latest news from Brett isn’t good if you’re me. Lizzie’s message which she sent to Leon last night said something like, “DO YOU LIKE TESS? SHE REALLY LIKES YOU + WANTS YOU TO ASK HER OUT AGAIN (SHE’D SAY YES!)”. I was waiting all day for him to reply but he didn’t.

Towards the end of the day, I’d pretty much concluded that he was either ignoring the message because I’d ignored Brett’s one asking me out for Leon or he still liked Becky so he didn’t know how to break it to me.

Lizzie also wanted answers so she told Brett to get some. Brett sent a message back saying, “MY FOOD TECH COOKING’S FUCKED!! LEON SAID HE DOESN’T KNOW. I THINK HE STILL LIKES BECKY.”

This is not good. I’m totally gutted! As per usual, I got my hopes up only to be greatly disappointed. I should’ve predicted that this’d happen, it just fits with my kind of luck. The only advantage I can come up with is that it didn’t go on for longer before I was told this. Then I may have felt worse, if that’s possible. Why couldn’t it just have gone right for once, hey? I am so pissed off now.

I got another message from Lizzie before. This one said, “MARK SAID LEON DOESN’T KNOW WHAT TO DO. BRETT THINKS U SHOULD ASK LEON OUT + HE WILL PROBABLY SAY YES. HE THINKS LEON’S SLOW SO YOU COULD BE WAITING YEARS FOR HIM TO ASK YOU OUT.”

I don’t want to ask him out. I prefer the lad to do the asking because it’s more likely that he wants to then instead of feeling pressurised into giving an answer. I sent one back saying, “NO!!! IT’D ONLY LEAVE THE POOR LAD EVEN MORE CONFUSED” I’D HATE 2 HAVE 2 CHOOSE. I’LL JUST LEAVE HIM 2 IT. IF HE LIKES BECKY MORE, IT’S JUST TOUGH. 😦 (grrrr!)”

If it gets back to Leon what I said then it might sound like I’m not really bothered so he might go out with Becky again but then I didn’t want to sound too bothered either because I might scare the lad and give him the impression I’m really possessive.

God! I like Leon so much! I can’t stand this, it’s horrible. If he’s rejected by either Becky or me, he’s got the other one to fall back on but if he chooses Becky over me, I’m back on my own again.

I don’t even think Aled’s interested anymore and I couldn’t be less interested in Reevesy if I tried!!

BYE!