I ended up lying through my teeth – 3rd & 4th November 1998

Tuesday 3rd I got questioned by Adrian Ford in Art today. He’s one of Ewan’s mates and was bound to say summit sooner or later coz he’s got a big gob on him. He was just sat there grinning at me and when I caught him he said, “Hello Tess. You alright?” I just nodded, gave him a funny look and carried on working.

A few minutes later, he came over and said, “What do you like being called? Tessa, Tez, Tess, Tezza? What?” I told him I didn’t really care so he asked what Emma usually called me. I dunno where that was leading. Then he asked what I was expecting him to ask. He said, “Do you like” then he mouthed “Ewan”.

At least he didn’t yell it but I still wouldn’t have admitted it to Adrian. I panicked again really and took the easy way out and said, “No, I don’t” then started asking who told him that. He wouldn’t say. He started saying the Ewan was a top bloke and stuff before asking me who it was that I did fancy. Ed then chipped in and told him I fancied Ferny and Adrian said, “Tallboy! Ah, you don’t?!”

Taking the hint that it was likely that he’d take the piss if I admitted to that, I denied it and told Ed (loudly so Adrian could hear) that it was Hayley who liked Ferny, not me. Then, to my relief, I managed to turn the conversation round onto Emma and Davis and Neil Kennedy.

I’d planned beforehand what I would say if the Adrian situation came up with anyone. But when I was finally asked if I fancied Ewan, instead of giving a fairly neutral answer of “he’s alright” like I wanted to, I ended up lying through my teeth.

Adrian’s probably told Ewan all that now so he’s either going to think I really don’t like him or that I’m shy or summit. Maybe if it hadn’t have been Adrian that asked and nobody else had’ve been listening then I might have said what I meant to say instead of complete bollocks just coz I was feeling intimidated.

Emma also decided to let Ewan’s brother Rick know who I like. He seemed to find it quite interesting. I did a similar thing there too. When Emma went, I said to Rach loudly so Rick could hear, “I wish Emma’d stop saying that. It’s not even true.” But then she came back and pissed it all up so he knew I was lying, I think.

I’ve got bloody Geography tomorrow again too. ARGH! [Ewan was in the same class.] This isn’t good. Some people think I like him, others think I don’t. I’m going to have to make up my mind which to tell people from now on. I want to say “he’s alright” but my mind tends to go blank in pressurising situations.


Wednesday 4th There’s not really much to write tonight. Rick Swann gave Emma a message to give to me though. He said that Ewan wanted me to talk to him so he could get to know me better.

Emma’s also found out that Ewan’s not coming with the Swing Band to Belgium coz he’s going to Barcelona and he may not be at the garden centre Xmas party.

I also had to nearly site with him in assembly this morning coz he and Adrian sort of pushed in the line just behind me and my mates. I managed to get further forward though somehow.


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