Saturday 29th As I always seem to do when I’m stuck at home and bored, I’ve been thinking. And as I have nothing to do, I’m writing in here.
I’ve just been listening to my Aqua album and (especially the song Lollipop) it reminds me of Austria because Rani was playing it all the time and we liked it.
It’s been about 6 months now since we went skiing and I still get this weird feeling in me when I remember the holiday. It’s a nice but sad feeling coz that was the best holiday I’ve ever been on (despite the injury to my knee) and I didn’t want it to end.
Then when I remember Austria, I think of Ferny coz I was getting on so well with him there, especially towards the end of the holiday. I keep remembering things he said and did which suggested he liked me but, according to his mates, he was obsessed with bloody Petra. [She was his ski instructor. He loved her so I hated her.]
There are 2 other times too when I thought it was possible Ferny could’ve liked me. When we went to see Jackie Brown and on Sports Day. It’s confusing though coz Ralph and Freddie reckon he only likes older women and Petra.
Oh, I dunno. He probably doesn’t like me coz in school he usually ignores me. I’d be better off not fancying him but I really can’t help it. I’ve got no chance with him so I may as well just forget him. I’m not going to, I’m just saying I may as well coz it’s totally pointless liking him coz it’s very unlikely I’ll ever get anywhere.
I’m sure he was flirting with me and being really nice in Austria etc. but it could’ve been my imagination and him being polite.
I’ve got my rollerblades… finally. They’re pretty good but I’m not really.
I’ve got to go to this stupid 25th wedding anniversary party thing of Emma’s parents tonight. I don’t really want to go. I know I’m boring but the rest of my family’ll be there and Abby’s gonna be following me round all the time and Emma’s got all these out-of-school friends like Suzanna that I don’t know very well. Plus Ralph’s gonna be there and everyone’ll get pissed.
I don’t wanna go AT ALL!